In this day and age, especially in this culture, where success and happiness tend to be measured in terms of material accumulation, it makes sense that gifting follows the same pattern.
The holidays have become so commercialized that their true meaning is completely lost on most. Children are waiting for the toys and might not even know what the holidays are about… People are stressed over who to spend the holidays with, what to buy for loved ones, and managing all the added work that comes with all the merry-making.
But, are people celebrating the true meaning? Are people enjoying the Season? Are people more spiritually grounded, enjoying peace and love? I’m sure the answer is NO for most…
Take a moment to ponder how you celebrate the meaning of your Holidays? What does your Season look like? How do you bring the message of the Season into your merriment and gift giving? How do you share this with your Partner?
I’m not going to go as far as to suggest you don’t buy each other a gift… That would just be outrageous! (sarcasm). I’m going to suggest though, that you think about how to bring the meaning of the Season into your relating through the rest of the year, and into the New Year.
I celebrate Christmas. To me the message is that of extending forgiveness, acceptance, understanding and compassion. Love. So the Holidays are about giving from the heart to meet another’s need, and giving to the less fortunate. It’s not about accumulating material stuff, or out doing the Joneses. It’s about giving the Gift of Our Self, our presence, and of being in communion and connected.
Make the rest of this Holiday Season meaningful in your Relationship(s):
1) Have realistic expectations – some people have a lesser capacity for “Giving.”
2) Don’t worry about what you are getting, focus on what you are “Giving.”
3) Share with your Partner what you love about them, what you appreciate they do, what you understand they struggle with or don’t like.
4) Get your Partner’s world and accept it. You don’t have to like it, but it’s not your job to change it. Have compassion for their perspective and experience. Be their shoulder to lean on.
5) Show up to your interactions. Be with your Partner. Let your Authentic Self create a positive ritual that promotes intimacy and connection.
Let the true Spirit of the Holidays be present in your Relationship. Allow Joy, Peace, Harmony and Abundance to permeate your Season and the New Year together. Rejoice!
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Copyright (c) 2016 Emma K. Viglucci. All rights reserved.
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Emma K. Viglucci, LMFT is the Founder and Director of Metropolitan Marriage & Family Therapy, PLLC, a private practice that specializes in working with couples, she is the creator of the MetroRelationship™ philosophy and a variety of Successful Couple™ content that assist couples succeed at their relationship and their life. Stay Connected™ with Emma and receive weekly Connection Notes in your inbox with Personal Growth and Relationship Enrichment insights and strategies, visit: www.metrorelationship.com.