Do you find that your relationship and life appear to be on pause? Do you feel like you’ve been in a hamster’s wheel? Does it feel like you are always back to square one, like you can’t get ahead, like life is passing you by? Does it feel like your relationship is not going anywhere? This is a very common feeling in some people’s lives and their relationship. This is experiencing Inertia.
Inertia is stuck energy that results from built-up resentment and anger, unspoken truths and unaddressed shame. This is the black hole that sucks up all your energy and resources – your very life. This is the antithesis of growth and healing. It behooves us to have the guts to open up and share our fears and vulnerabilities.
It behooves us to share our secrets. It behooves us to speak our mind, address our concerns, and get our needs met for if we don’t we are throwing our life away.
It takes courage to identify the source of our discomfort, discontent and pain. It takes greater courage to hold it, share it and address it. This is no easy feat. The challenge is that the status quo, as dissatisfying as it might be, is actually easier to deal with.
Changing patterns, growing and healing require work, consistent and dedicated work. The situation could be likened to a rubber band – you can stretch it but it always goes back. Only until it passes a critical point, where it gives, does it stay stretched.
The hint of the day is to keep at it and not to be discouraged when old patterns show up. Rome was not built in a day. The consistent effort will ensure that the changes sought happen and stick – for once placed in their new framework they will remain.
In the midst of all this work lurks ambivalence, uncertainty, fear, and pain; but if you are one of the lucky ones that can see the big picture, for you there is also elation, strength, and hope for you see the possibilities.
The transition from being stuck to living your authentic life is laborious, treacherous and full of snares. Transcend this and experience the promise of what is to come. Focus on the possibilities. Envision what you deserve and so it shall be.
Happy Stretching & Growing!
~ Your MetroRelationship™ Assignment
As you start owning your Self and your life, and start holding your own and addressing concerns with loved ones, you will encounter resistance from your Self and others. This is the time to be gentle and caring to your Self, and responsively and lovingly hold your ground. Put a lot of self care in place for your Self and your relationship.
Copyright (c) 2016 Emma K. Viglucci. All rights reserved.
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Emma K. Viglucci, LMFT is the Founder and Director of Metropolitan Marriage & Family Therapy, PLLC, a private practice that specializes in working with couples, she is the creator of the MetroRelationship™ philosophy and a variety of Successful Couple™ content that assist couples succeed at their relationship and their life. Stay Connected™ with Emma and receive weekly Connection Notes in your inbox with Personal Growth and Relationship Enrichment insights and strategies, visit: www.metrorelationship.com.
