It is not uncommon for partners to feel bored, stale, empty, disconnected and cranky. When this is not attended to it festers and creates more difficulties in the relationship. Partner’s start to wonder about the solidity of the relationship, their commitment to it and how much they want to actually be with their partner.
I want to give a warning here that temporary or superficial disconnects, boredom and funk can feel like true dissatisfaction with the relationship and the partner. The whole thing doesn’t have to be chucked until real and appropriate attempts at reconnecting have been tried. Most of these relationships could have made it only if enough appropriate attention had been given to it at the right time.
I hate to see couples try too little too late. If something doesn’t feel right do something about it right away! Relationships are very delicate and can’t afford to stay in a yucky place for very long the damage might be irreversible. Getting connected and staying connected with our partner is the first step in beating the funk. The second step is keeping things interesting, alluring and fun. And, don’t forget light. Some partners are just too serious and gloomy.
There is nothing to be ashamed of in identifying that things need a bit of spiffing up. Routine, demands and the power struggle have a way of corroding the liveliness and energy out of relationships. An open and honest (this doesn’t mean brutal or mean) discussion about how the partner’s are experiencing each other and what each other’s needs are in relation to one another is one way to get rolling on this venture to charging things up again.
This discussion in and of itself, although sometimes painful, can be a reconnecting experience. The discussion should include brainstorming about ways to get and stay connected and seduced. A little willingness, openness and risking can go a long way. From this new place anything is possible. I invite you to take a chance and have trust in your ability to create what you both crave feeling loved and satisfied in your relating.
Happy Seducing!!!
~ Your MetroRelationship™ Assignment Invite your partner to create a joint fun wish list and make the commitment to do one item off the list a week (or at any other agreed upon time interval). Have fun!!
Copyright (c) 2016 Emma K. Viglucci. All rights reserved.
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Emma K. Viglucci, LMFT is the Founder and Director of Metropolitan Marriage & Family Therapy, PLLC, a private practice that specializes in working with couples, she is the creator of the MetroRelationship™ philosophy and a variety of Successful Couple™ content that assist couples succeed at their relationship and their life. Stay Connected™ with Emma and receive weekly Connection Notes in your inbox with Personal Growth and Relationship Enrichment insights and strategies, visit: www.metrorelationship.com.
