Springtime is a time for renewal and New Beginnings… It is an opportunity to start fresh again. It is a time to refresh, course correct and reset. All changes in season and any new start, provide the opportunity for New Beginnings… Spring is special in this endeavor as the newness is so obvious with nature springing back to life… There is momentum in this… This is your chance to spring to a new level in your relationship and life…
Does that sound scary, or empowering and motivating to you? Taking full ownership and being fully accountable for what we create in our life can be scary. It might seem easier to stick our head in the sand, to blame others or circumstances, and to settle than to play full out.
The truth is that when we live our life with lack of full ownership, our life is actually more challenging and more painful…
It is not easy to:
- Constantly be blown with the wind and with the whim of others
- Let others dictate our fate and live an unfulfilled life
- Live inauthentically for fear of judgement, criticism and rejection
- Commit, show up and engage only 99%, allowing for waffling
- Own our voice, our truth, our desires and our potential
- Express all of ourselves
- Shine our Radiance
I invite you to play full out! But to do that you need to know yourself, own yourself and apply yourself. Are you ready for that?
You might even be scared to say Yes… If this is you, no worries we are here to support you. We’ll go nice and easy, yet powerfully, so you can stick with us and honor your Journey…
The first thing to do is to start getting in touch with what you want your life to be like, truly… No hedging, no lip service, no settling, no excuses. If nothing mattered but to create the life you desired, what would it look like?
What would your life look like, if your life depended on it…?
This means really exploring your desires for the whole of your life… This means being curious, thinking deeply, visualizing and meditating on what is really in your heart and soul…
Make some time to be with yourself and to really play, explore and dream about these. We are taking this concept beyond identifying your Ideal Day and accumulating Ideal Days to create your Best Life. That is a hack to get you going and to get you on your right path…
Now, we are going for creating our Best Life 2.0!
The 8 Robust Life Areas™
Break down your life into specific Life Areas and flesh out what you desire in each.
- Spiritual – Spirituality/religion, mindfulness, Purpose, creativity
- Physical – Health including brain health, vitality, fitness
- Emotional – Resilience, self/co-regulation, managing states of being
- Mental – Mental health, mindset, intellect, character/virtues
- Relational – Love and romantic relationship, parenting, family
- Social – Friendships, community and networks
- Financial – Wealth, profession, business, contribution/legacy
- LifeStyle – Environments, routines, life engagement
The 3 Life Areas Hack™
I usually address the above in a condensed 3 Life Areas format with an overarching Self-care and Relationship Enrichment Lifestyle theme…
- Wellness – Spiritual, Physical, Emotional, Mental
- Connection – Relational, Social
- Success – Financial, Lifestyle
Regardless of where you are in your Journey, the approach you choose to play with, and your relationship status, it behooves us to prioritize our relationship/s as this is indicated for our Best Life…
If we are not ok as a couple, everything in our life suffers… If we create a radiant and successful relationship then everything else in our life is easier… Everything in our life depends on it…
Visioning Your Best Relationship…
The relationship with our partner is one of the most important relationships in our life. Unfortunately, we usually don’t view it and treat it as such.
Our partner is our Life Partner… They are a Gift to our Journey…
Together we are better than alone. Together we are better than one. Together we create something bigger than ourselves and can make a larger Impact… There is Synergy in our togetherness and what a waste not to tap into it…
To create your Best Relationship, you first have to know what your Best Relationship would look like… Then you can go about creating it.
Below is a guide for things to consider when envisioning and designing your Best Relationship. They are of course presented as the 5 Elements of the Successful Couple Strategy™ developed to assist couples create the relationship they desire…
Element1 – Context & Mindset
Here is where you explore what you believe about attracting your mate, being in a romantic relationship, the purpose of the relationship, commitment, trust, devotion and loyalty, priorities, partnership, expectations, interdependence, synergy, contribution, impact and anything else important to you.
What would a Relationship Enrichment Lifestyle look like for you? What would prioritizing your partner look like for you? What would being all in look like for you…?
Element2 – Communication & Alignment
Here is where you explore what being on the same page with your partner would look and feel like. You’d explore beliefs and preferences about communication and being aligned. And, on what topics you would want to get on the same page.
How would communication take place? How would you safeguard your bond and eliminate communication roadblocks? What communication skills and tools would you acquire?
Element3 – Clarity & Dynamics
Here is where you explore what you believe and understand about relationship dynamics, repeating patterns, and getting stuck. And what kind of relationship dynamics you’d prefer. You’d also explore your beliefs about feelings, emotions, and needs. Including thoughts about worthiness and self-esteem, vulnerability and shame, sympathy and compassion.
How would you build resilience and increase self-esteem? How would you increase your EQ? How would you meet your own and each other’s needs?
Element4 – Connection & Intimacy
Here is where you explore what you believe about and your preferences for togetherness vs separateness, connection, love, bond, masculinity and femininity, romance, sensuality, attraction, desire, passion, intimacy, sexuality, stimulation, play, fun, adventure, and friendship.
How would you increase your connection, intimacy and fun? How would you need to Be to experience a deep, synergistic long-lasting love? How do you need to stretch to allow the love you want?
Element5 – Collaboration & Partnership
Here is where you explore what Life Partnership, creating a Strong Partnership, and collaborating mean to you. You’ll explore what kind of family and life you want to create. How you’d want to be a strong partnership. How you want to design and approach creating the life you desire.
How do you want to run your business of life? What kind of parents do you want to be? How do you want to live your life? What kind of lifestyle do you want to have? What kind of legacy you want to leave?
By reading the above, you are already ahead of the game… You can’t unread it and unearth the seeds planted… Your brain already has the instructions to take stock of your life, and your relationship; and, to strive for more…
You’ll start picking up momentum and getting massive traction in your transformation by:
- Exploring what’s informing your current experience in your relationship
- Exploring what kind of relationship you desire
- Consciously and intentionally choosing how to create your Best Relationship
It all starts with a Vision. That’s what you are doing today. You are fleshing out and owning how you truly want your relationship to be. This is the first step in making it happen…
ASSIGNMENT: Choose the approach that best resonates for you at this time, playing with:
- The 8 Robust Life Areas™
- The 3 Life Areas Hack™
- Visioning Your Best Relationship™ using the 5 Elements of the Successful Couple Strategy™
The mere exercise of bringing light to these will start you on your transformation…
As with anything, when you bring consciousness, focus and attention to something, Awesomeness happens. I wish this for you in your life and your relationship.
Wishing you much joy, connection and love today and always…
With Much Love & Light!
PS – Related Posts:
Is your partner always late?
Are you controlling?
When your partner baits you
When do you get on your partner’s nerves?
How much do you get your partner?
Can you change your partner?
Can’t get your partner to do what you want?
How do you show your commitment?
What about compassion?
Are you tapping into your partnership synergy?
The 5 Elements of the Successful Couple Strategy™
Embrace a life-changing mindset
Enhance your life with better boundaries!
Step up your communication skills!
Change your repeating patterns and stuckness!
Are you mastering how to connect?
Create your strongest partnership possible
Copyright (c) 2021 Emma K. Viglucci. All rights reserved.
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Emma K. Viglucci, LMFT is the Founder and Director of Metropolitan Marriage & Family Therapy, PLLC, a private practice that specializes in working with couples, she is the creator of the MetroRelationship™ philosophy and the Successful Couple Strategy™ that assist couples succeed at their relationship and their life. Stay Connected™ with Emma and receive weekly connection notes in your inbox with Personal Development and Relationship Enrichment insights and strategies, visit: www.metrorelationship.com