What are we to do when we feel we tried it all to create change in our relationship, but nothing is working? I wager that there is actually a ton more that you can still do, without much effort…
I know that when we are frustrated and tired of the same arguments and conflicts that we are likely to feel hopeless and like giving up. It seems that everything we tried hasn’t worked and therefore like there is nothing left to do… But I promise that is just not the case…
It usually feels like there is nothing else we can do because we keep looking at our situation with the same lens on and the same filters. Which usually flow from an ego pattern and are negative. How are you supposed to see possibilities by looking at things in the same old way, and a negative way at that?
The way out of this conundrum is to realize how much power we actually have… We have tremendous power to impact and influence our partner and our relationship… Both positively and negatively…
But we are intentional about how we yield this power both partners can stand to reap amazing benefits.
This Month’s Theme is IMPACT, helping partners take their power back, fully own, and properly yield it.
If we want to create change in our relationship and in our life, it is time we take charge of creating what we desire. And we do it by fully owning our impact…
In today’s video I cover, how to: ~ Mind your Effect ~ Own your Shape ~ Optimize your Influence
So you have a positive impact on your relationship to create the relationship and life you want…
PSS: Do you need support taking yourself, your relationship, and your life to the next level- actually living a healthy, happy, harmonious and overall abundant life?
Copyright (c) 2023 Emma K. Viglucci. All rights reserved.
Want to Use this Article in Your Own Website or Publication? Be our guest! Here is how, you MUST include: Emma K. Viglucci, LMFT is the Founder and Director of Metropolitan Marriage & Family Therapy, PLLC, a private practice that specializes in working with couples, she is the creator of the MetroRelationship™ philosophy and the Successful Couple Strategy™ that assist couples succeed at their relationship and their life. Stay Connected™ with Emma and receive weekly connection notes in your inbox with Personal Development and Relationship Enrichment insights and strategies, visit: www.metrorelationship.com.
Who says being in a committed relationship is hard? Though relationships can be challenging they don’t have to be if we are intentional about how we go about creating our successful relationship.
There are some key ingredients that we need to bring to our relationship for it to be gratifying and successful.
Research shows that successful couples demonstrate some key ingredients that we’d be remiss not to emulate. And, according to John Gottman, renowned relationship researcher, the opposite is also true. There are key characteristics that when found in a relationship are strong predictors of break-up or divorce.
Committed relationships, marriage, are special, delicate, and very important to our overall wellbeing. They are the pillar of our society as they stabilize the family unit, and are the strongest influence on our children.
Embracing a Relationship Enrichment Lifestyle is an easy way to invest in our relationship without being put out or getting stressed out about it. Showing our partner love and care shouldn’t feel like a chore. When we go about it the right way, it is actually a pleasure…
In this episode I interview a longtime friend and colleague, Carole Cullen who is also a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist. Together we geek out about a few secret ingredients that make for a successful relationship.
We talk about 4 key ingredients: 1~ Emotional Intimacy 2~ Communication 3~ Quality Time 4~ Shared Goals & Values
I love the conversation with Carole about the ingredients for a Successful Relationship. For more on them check out the Elements of our Successful Relationship Strategy™. I’m so pleased with having had her as our first guest.
PSS: Do you need support taking yourself, your relationship, and your life to the next level- actually living a healthy, happy, harmonious and overall abundant life?
Copyright (c) 2023 Emma K. Viglucci. All rights reserved.
Want to Use this Article in Your Own Website or Publication? Be our guest! Here is how, you MUST include: Emma K. Viglucci, LMFT is the Founder and Director of Metropolitan Marriage & Family Therapy, PLLC, a private practice that specializes in working with couples, she is the creator of the MetroRelationship™ philosophy and the Successful Couple Strategy™ that assist couples succeed at their relationship and their life. Stay Connected™ with Emma and receive weekly connection notes in your inbox with Personal Development and Relationship Enrichment insights and strategies, visit: www.metrorelationship.com.
A key element of a successful relationship is having good communication skills and tools. When we don’t, that’s when our relationship is riddled with misunderstanding, conflict, and fighting. This in turn leads to creating friction between the partners that only manifests into issues and disconnection in the relationship.
But it is optimal for creating our successful relationship to have a wider range of skills and tools. When partners improve their communication skills they can:
~ More easily get on the same page ~ Be better able to understand each other ~ Address their needs ~ Deepen their connection ~ Uplevel their collaboration
Improving communication skills is a must have to make all other facets of the relationship go smooth. When we can properly communicate with our partner we can address anything and create anything.
Things that usually don’t get addressed because the partners are afraid the conversation will turn into a fight include things like:
Expectations and thoughts about things
Broken promises and other disappointments
Feelings, needs and preferences
Wishes, dreams and goals
Desires for intimate life
Issues in the home
Challenges different areas of life
And more…
Gaining greater communication skills doesn’t have to be difficult.
In today’s video, I show you 3 levels of communication to start addressing any difficulties you might be having getting along with your partner.
I talk about, how to: ~ Improve Communication ~ Deepen Communication ~ Enhance Communication
Focus on improving your communication and you’ll create immediate ease and joy in your relationship…
PSS: Do you need support taking yourself, your relationship, and your life to the next level- actually living a healthy, happy, harmonious and overall abundant life?
Copyright (c) 2023 Emma K. Viglucci. All rights reserved.
Want to Use this Article in Your Own Website or Publication? Be our guest! Here is how, you MUST include: Emma K. Viglucci, LMFT is the Founder and Director of Metropolitan Marriage & Family Therapy, PLLC, a private practice that specializes in working with couples, she is the creator of the MetroRelationship™ philosophy and the Successful Couple Strategy™ that assist couples succeed at their relationship and their life. Stay Connected™ with Emma and receive weekly connection notes in your inbox with Personal Development and Relationship Enrichment insights and strategies, visit: www.metrorelationship.com.
One of the main reasons couples argue is because they are not on the same page. It’s not so much because they might disagree on something, but it has more to do with knowing and understanding where each partner is coming from. Partners usually make assumptions about what is going on, what their partner wants, and that they both want the same thing… Partners don’t always share what’s on their mind, their wishes, and desires and expect their partner to somehow know… Not sharing expectations with your partner is a sure way to not be on the same page, to have disagreements, conflicts, arguments, and fights.
There are many reasons that partners might not share their expectations with each other, some include that:
~ They might not realize that it’s easier to get on the same page when the parties involved know what’s on the table
~ They might be afraid to share for fear of being misunderstood, judged, and rejected
~ They might be worried that their partner knowing what they want might cause disagreements, conflicts, arguments, and fights
What they don’t realize is that as they each operate from their own set of beliefs, opinions, expectations, and wishes that they are more likely than not to run into trouble. Can’t be on the same team, collaborate and work towards achieving a common goal if the partners are focused on different things and doing things in different ways.
When the partners are not aligned, they are each going in their own direction making it impossible to make progress creating the home life, family, lifestyle, and life they want. Not to mention that there is friction and conflict at every step of the way, making it challenging to get along, feel good about the relationship, and cultivate connection and embrace their love.
It is important for partners to get on the same page about their expectations so they can align and better collaborate, creating a strong partnership and successful relationship…
Clarifying Expectations
The first order of business is to own for oneself what our beliefs are about all areas of life and relationship to make sure we have a clean mindset to draw expectations from… If we have limiting beliefs, a lack mentality, and just overall poor mental hygiene, we are likely to have faulty expectations out of the gate.
Then not only would we not have communicated our expectations to our partner, but they are unrealistic and potentially out there as well. Talk about setting up our relationship to be a struggle…
So, back to the first order of business, review all the areas for yourself first. Scrutinizing your beliefs about them as to:
~ How realistic they are ~ Do they make sense ~ How did you come to believe them ~ Did you choose these or were they passed down to you ~ Do you want to keep them ~ Do they need to be upgraded ~ And so on
Clean up what you believe about each area to be really representative of where you stand with things. Fully own what you believe in its cleanest form.
The areas, topics, and concepts to review include things like:
Dating
Intimacy
Connection
Affection
Touch
Sex
Sexuality
Body
Gender
Gender Roles
Relationship
Commitment
Marriage
In-laws
Husband
Wife
Spouse
Partner
Partnership
Pregnancy
Nursing
Children
Parenting
Discipline
Education
Health
Illness
Death
Weight
Priorities
Goals
Collaboration
Support
Chores
House Keeping
Leisure
Vacation
Career
Success
Finances
Debt
Money
Spirituality
Religion
Politics
Social Systems
Social Institutions
And so on…
Explore as much or a little as makes sense for where you are in your relationship and add other things that are important to you that might not be captured on the list. Then you are ready to share with your partner…
As you can probably see, these are big things that we have all sorts of ideas, preferences, and expectations about that we might not be fully aware ourselves and that are impacting our relationship and our life.
And, as you can probably see, these can wreak some havoc in our interactions and our relationship if we are not proactive about what we belief and expect and about making that known…
Just remember when you have your sharing session with your partner, to be gentle, open, understanding, accepting and mindful. Both your sides are equally as valid, and you might find that you diverge on things.
That’s ok. That’s the point of this exercise. To find the differences so you can work on getting on the same page for improving your collaboration, partnership and overall relationship and life.
PSS: Do you need support taking yourself, your relationship, and your life to the next level- actually living a healthy, happy, harmonious and overall abundant life?
Copyright (c) 2023 Emma K. Viglucci. All rights reserved.
Want to Use this Article in Your Own Website or Publication? Be our guest! Here is how, you MUST include: Emma K. Viglucci, LMFT is the Founder and Director of Metropolitan Marriage & Family Therapy, PLLC, a private practice that specializes in working with couples, she is the creator of the MetroRelationship™ philosophy and the Successful Couple Strategy™ that assist couples succeed at their relationship and their life. Stay Connected™ with Emma and receive weekly connection notes in your inbox with Personal Development and Relationship Enrichment insights and strategies, visit: www.metrorelationship.com.
It takes intentionality to become our best self, create our successful relationship, and live a meaningful life… Too often though we go about life putting out fires, banging around, and living by default. We do the grind and if we are lucky, we plan and enjoy time off.
But is this all there is to life at the end of the day? Is this the life we want to live? Have you given thought to what kind of life you want to live, what kind of relationship you want to be in? Have you given any thought about how to create these? For they don’t just happen…
To run a smooth household and create the life you want requires getting on the same page with your partner. About what you want to create and how to go about creating it. How to easily work together and collaborate in your marriage or committed relationship.
As we get back from the Summer and vacation mode, it’s time to assess how we go about our relationship and our life to ensure we set ourselves up to rock the rest of the year. Now is the time to realign with our life vision and get on the same page with our partner about our goals and the lifestyle we want to create. To make any adjustments to stay on the right track.
Consider how you’d like the rest of the year to go, what codes you still want to crack, and how you want to uplevel your relationship and your life…
In today’s video, I show how to identify what you want to create and how to go about creating it with your partner.
I talk about how to: ~ Have a Joint Vision ~ Divide and Conquer Responsibilities ~ Operate from the Same Page
Here is coming back from Summer strong!
Watch other Monthly Theme videos on our YouTube channel
PSS: Do you need support taking yourself, your relationship, and your life to the next level- actually living a healthy, happy, harmonious and overall abundant life?
Copyright (c) 2023 Emma K. Viglucci. All rights reserved.
Want to Use this Article in Your Own Website or Publication? Be our guest! Here is how, you MUST include: Emma K. Viglucci, LMFT is the Founder and Director of Metropolitan Marriage & Family Therapy, PLLC, a private practice that specializes in working with couples, she is the creator of the MetroRelationship™ philosophy and the Successful Couple Strategy™ that assist couples succeed at their relationship and their life. Stay Connected™ with Emma and receive weekly connection notes in your inbox with Personal Development and Relationship Enrichment insights and strategies, visit: www.metrorelationship.com.
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Emma K. Viglucci, LMFT has been in the mental health profession in varying capacities for the past 20+ years. She is the Founder and Director of metrorelationship.com a psychotherapy and coaching practice specializing in working with busy professional and entrepreneurial couples who are struggling getting on the same page and feeling connected. The work helps couples create a radiant and successful relationship and meaningful life by becoming a strong partnership and increasing their connection, intimacy, and fun. Emma is the creator of the MetroRelationship™ philosophy and the Successful Relationship Strategy™.
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