Your mental health issues make you unique and special

Your mental health issues make you unique and special

We might feel stuck as in not progressing or going in circles in our relationship or in our life in general. Having repeating patterns, having the same old arguments, issues, or negative situations. Feeling at a loss or at an impasse. Feeling behind our peers or where we think we should be in life. We are not satisfied with the status quo but have no idea how to go about creating the change we desire. We’ve tried different things, but nothing seems to stick… We just can’t get ahead, change things, or make the progress we’d like. We might think there is something wrong with us, or we might think there is something wrong with our partner…  

You might even think one or both of you have mental health issues… One or both of you might be diagnosable and might already have a mental health diagnosis… You might be experiencing challenges managing your life and you might be showing up to your relationship with a host of symptoms… You might be experiencing stunted growth or personal development, and lack of achievement in some or most areas of your life. The pain of this can feel unbearable and your situation feel completely hopeless.

Just know that having mental health challenges is more common than you might think… 

And, having mental health challenges doesn’t make one less of a person, a bad person, or unworthy… Having mental health challenges impacts our overall wellbeing and health, our relationships, and our life in general… 

Some signs of mental health issues include:

  • Feeling stressed, overwhelmed, worried, fearful, guilt, anxious
  • Feeling unmotivated, hopeless, sad, unhappy, worthless, depressed
  • Having confused thinking and reduced ability to concentrate
  • Having sudden or dramatic changes in mood and emotional outbursts
  • Having sleep problems like insomnia or sleeping too much, feeling tiredness, low energy
  • Having rapid weight gain or loss, or appetite changes
  • Having sex drive changes
  • Isolating or withdrawing from loved ones and activities 
  • Substance abuse
  • Feeling excessively highs and lows, engaging in high-risk behaviors, having bizarre or strange thoughts, difficulty understanding and relating to situations or to people
  • Neglecting hygiene and performance
  • Having suicidal thoughts [call 988]

As you can see a lot of the above symptoms are very common for a lot of people in everyday life… Mental health issues do not just manifest as extreme cases we might see on T.V. where people are walking around naked in the streets talking to themselves and believing they are God. 

Mental health issues can manifest in the simplest of forms in our day… And this doesn’t take away from who we are at the end of the day. We generally don’t judge ourselves or people for having other conditions or situations. Why should any mental health concerns be any different?

Our mental health is one of our greatest possessions, tools, benefits, gifts that we have in our life. It literally creates our reality… It behooves us to take good care of our mental health so that we can create the relationship and life we desire…

Ways to invest in our mental health include:

  • Eating nutritious foods and properly hydrating
  • Getting plenty of sleep
  • Setting proper boundaries and reducing stress
  • Reducing screen time and exposure to social media and the news
  • Practicing mindfulness
  • Practicing embodiment
  • Being in nature and living a slower life
  • Pursuing interests and cultivating joy
  • Engaging in authentic and purposeful living

Understanding that we all glitch out (not intending to minimize serious and debilitating mental illness) and that struggling with our mental health doesn’t lessen us as a person, is a huge first step in having compassion and self-love. And towards investing in our resilience and wellbeing. Giving others affected by mental health concerns this courtesy and love is also paramount for us as a collective…

Any struggle with mental health is part of our journey and human experience. It’s part of our life and what makes us who we are. We are actually unique and special because of it. It gives us the flavor of who we are. Eh? How is that for a reframe on this struggle? 

Let’s embrace the fullness of who we are. We don’t have to let this define us of course but we can definitely own how it contributes to who we are, and not in a negative way!

 

Watch our related videos on our YouTube channel

Get our FREE 1-pg downloadable Codependence Quiz to identify if and how you are impacted by codependence in your relationship- do you love too much?

 

Wishing you all the joy, connection and love today and always…

With Much Love & Light!

 

PS: Related Articles
What about compassion?
Give the Gift of Understanding and Compassion…
5 Insights for your physical and mental health
Addictions impact mental health and success
Reprogram yourself with self-reparenting
Caring is not just for Mothers!
Mothering Vs Fathering
A simple way to change your programming…
Another simple way to change your programming…
Take off the identity mask you chose for your life
The ultimate tool for outsmarting your ego…
Prevent drama with self-regulation and co-regulation
Embrace the art of self-care for increased self-regulation and resilience
Loving practices for self-regulation and relationship enrichment

 

PSS: Do you need support taking yourself, your relationship, and your life to the next level- actually living a healthy, happy, harmonious and overall abundant life?

Interested in Couple Therapy, Marriage Counseling, Relationship Coaching, Individual Therapy or Support Sessions?

We can help with our private and group memberships:
Success Membership

Radiance Membership

 

Look forward to seeing you inside!

 

   Copyright (c) 2024 Emma K. Viglucci. All rights reserved.

 

Want to Use this Article in Your Own Website or Publication?
Be our guest! Here is how, you MUST include:
Emma K. Viglucci, LMFT is the Founder and Director of Metropolitan Marriage & Family Therapy, PLLC, a private practice that specializes in working with couples, she is the creator of the MetroRelationship™ philosophy and the Successful Couple Strategy™ that assist couples succeed at their relationship and their life. Stay Connected™
with Emma and receive weekly connection notes in your inbox with Personal Development and Relationship Enrichment insights and strategies, visit: www.metrorelationship.com

Loving ourselves allows us to better love our partner… [VIDEO]

Loving ourselves allows us to better love our partner… [VIDEO]

You know how when you fly, they say that in case of an emergency to first put on your oxygen mask and then assist others? Well, the same concept applies to the rest of our life… We have to take care of ourselves for us to be in good shape to be in relationship with our partner, and others… 

When we embrace a self-love practice, in which there is a huge component of self-care, then we activate our authentic self, we create flow, we nourish and enliven ourselves. Now this is a Best Self… This self can have amazing energy, insights, patience, compassion, creativity and all the rest to be the best partner and lover. When we are unhealthy, weak, stressed, overwhelmed, tired and such, we don’t make very good company…

~ It is our job to make sure we are healthy and well. 

~ It is our job we show up with our Best Self and we be the Best Partner. 

~ It is our job to make sure we continue to evolve and elevate… 

Upshift…

To this end, how we do everything matters. From the moment we are aware we are awake, and we choose our first thoughts of the day, to how we wrap up our day and settle down for a good night sleep, all have an impact on our health and wellness. On how resourced we are to be able to show up with our Best Self… 

When we bang around life and are noisy and scattered and tapped out, we are not fresh, available, and able to have meaningful, nourishing, and enlivening interactions. We just don’t make good company… And this is when we insist on interacting with our partner and then wonder how come we get prickly, triggered, and sucked into a less than ideal exchange or even a full-blown fight.

To be a loving partner, and create a loving relationship, we first have to give ourselves love… To have a wonderful relationship, we have to clean up our routines and habits so we can properly show up to our relationship. 

How about we slow down a bit and become a lot more intentional about how we take care of ourselves? This is where having more love in our life starts.

Watch the video to learn how to uplevel your relationship with food and step up your self-care!

 

 

Watch our previous Podcast Episodes on our YouTube channel 

Celebrate your Love! Get this FREE Date Your Partner protocol now!

 

Wishing you all the joy, connection and love today and always…

With Much Love & Light!

 

PS: Related Articles
Are You Up for Unconditional Love?
It’s Time for Love!
Sprinkle Your Relationship with Sexiness and Fun this Valentine’s!
Expand Your Consciousness, Expand Your Love [VIDEO]
Connection Habits help enhance or rekindle love … (VIDEO)
Do you know how to have fun together?
Do You Play with Your Partner?
Get back your connection and intimacy
Spice-Up Your Relationship this Year

 

PSS: Do you need support taking yourself, your relationship, and your life to the next level- actually living a healthy, happy, harmonious and overall abundant life?

Interested in Couple Therapy, Marriage Counseling, Relationship Coaching, Individual Therapy or Support Sessions?

We can help with our private and group memberships:
Success Membership

Radiance Membership

 

Look forward to seeing you inside!

 

   Copyright (c) 2024 Emma K. Viglucci. All rights reserved.

 

Want to Use this Article in Your Own Website or Publication?
Be our guest! Here is how, you MUST include:
Emma K. Viglucci, LMFT is the Founder and Director of Metropolitan Marriage & Family Therapy, PLLC, a private practice that specializes in working with couples, she is the creator of the MetroRelationship™ philosophy and the Successful Couple Strategy™ that assist couples succeed at their relationship and their life. Stay Connected™
with Emma and receive weekly connection notes in your inbox with Personal Development and Relationship Enrichment insights and strategies, visit: www.metrorelationship.com

Uplevel your relationship by delighting your partner (VIDEO)

Uplevel your relationship by delighting your partner (VIDEO)

How much do you love Valentine’s Day? That’s a tricky question, posed as an invitation for you to think about Relationship Nurturing… Regardless of how you feel about the holiday, and regardless of the status of your relationship…, I encourage you to use it to earmark a moment to step it up in the love department in your relationship…

For you see any excuse to be nicer, more generous, more nurturing, more wooing should be an automatic, Yes. This is how you uplevel your relationship by delighting your partner…

I obviously agree that this should not just be left for Valentine’s Day… Let me offer my yearly disclaimer and then we can get to delighting your partner. 😉

Part of what makes good relationships great, is the extra mile the partners go to for their partner… This is beyond the business of life… They are willing to put in the time, to give the attention, to create the fun and funny memories, to create traditions, to do special gestures outside of the routine, to create special moments that highlight what is important.

Celebrating birthdays, anniversaries, Valentine’s Day and the rest of the holidays by adding something special for your partner shows your partner they are your person… Your partner should not be treated like everybody else and obviously not worse, which unfortunately happens too often…

So- Valentine’s Day is just another opportunity to do something special for your partner. Ok? Ok.

And hey, I get that figuring out what to do for fun, what to do for Date Night, and how to woo your partner for Valentine’s Day and otherwise can leave most partners at a loss. Delighting your partner can be such a pleasure for them and for you…

Let me show you how to be Delighting…

 

Delighting Your Partner

Delighting your partner has to do with doing gestures that touch their heart. Plain and simple. We can go completely out of our way to do something for our partner but if they don’t want it, like it or appreciate it, we are just wasting our time.

It is very easy for us to think of what is best for our partner and to think we know what they need, according to us. But most of the time when we are coming from this place, we are just in their circle (owning them, crossing boundaries, codependently caretaking) and not really being delighting…

The key to Delighting our partner has to do with giving them what they would like because they’ve told us or from what we know about them (not from a caretaking place). If getting the nuance here is challenging, refer to other boundary setting and ownership work.

Even after that distinction it might still be challenging to think of how, and to keep things fresh and interesting.

Some ways to help you come up with ideas is to use your partner’s:

• Practical Needs
• Emotional Needs
• Love Language
• Interests
• Idiosyncrasies
• Desires
• Dreams

You can generate a list of gifts, gestures, activities, and more for each item listed to prime yourself and get the creative juices going. Don’t limit yourself to what you come up with, let this serve as an inspiration and a tickler to generate additional ideas…

Be always on the lookout for what might tickle your partner’s heart.

You don’t have to torture yourself to be super creative and think outside the box for the most special gift ever and the most romantical outing ever. LOL

The key to Delighting your partner is to know your partner and do the things that pleases them…

 

Other Categories

You can come up with as many other categories as you’d like, and then flesh them out for specific Delighting gestures… For example:

Routine & Sustenance Related – On a recurring basis as a ritual or spontaneously as a treat, do anything from this list or your version of them for your partner

• Breakfast in bed
• Morning coffee
• Workout shake
• Green smoothie or juice
• Cut up or baked vegetables for snacking
• Salad or other healthy lunch
• Healthy midafternoon snack or treat
• Flavored tea
• Favorite dinner
• Decadent dessert

Romancing & Wooing Related – On an ongoing basis, for special occasions, or just because, use these romantical and wooing gestures and activities or your version of them towards your partner (We have a few vendors we like, check them out Here!)

• Fresh flowers bouquets, wreaths, plants
• Perfumes, candles, essential oils
• Handcrafted chocolates or other delicacies, novelty, or decadent treats
• Tickets to events or activities
• Gags and pranks
• Couple classes (i.e., flower arrangements, cooking, chocolate making, dancing)
• Other experiences (i.e., massage and body ritual, food and wine tasting, driving experience)
• Being in nature (i.e., hiking, camping, stargazing, fruit picking)
• Relationship scrapbooking or music playlisting
• Sexy toys, clothing, activities

Delighting your partner doesn’t have to stump you. ­­Just take a moment to don your generous, nurturing and playful vibes and give it a think.  

 

Watch the video for inspiration on embracing Delighting Your Partner… Enjoy!

 

MONTHLY THEME GUIDE: Dating Your Partner

 

APPLICATION: Decide to embrace a Relationship Nurturing Practice that includes Delighting Your Partner

1. Select or identify a Delighting Category you’ll play with this month
2. Flesh out what kind of gestures, activities, and gifting it might include
3. Map out your delivery of this deliciousness throughout the month

Have fun Delighting your partner!

Now think what would happen to your relationship if you did this every month… How is that for a challenge, will you accept it?

 

Remember, that to have an amazing relationship means, we have to create an amazing relationship… Here is to yours!

Wishing you all the joy, connection and love today and always…

With Much Love & Light!

 

PS: Masterclasses

🌟 This month’s Masterclass

Relationship Enrichment Mini Retreat-
Connect More Deeply, Rekindle Your Love
Keeping the love alive is not easy. Relationship slumps are common, but they don’t have to do you in.

Come learn how to recharge your relationship and rekindle your love.
Includes Recording and gorgeous Workbook of transformational processes 
Register HERE

 

🌟 If you missed the embracing a Self-Love Practice Masterclass, you can still get it through our Member Center with a Lifestyle Membership!

A Self-Love Strategy for Creating Your Best Life-
Stop Self-Sabotage, Increase Resilience, and Generate More Joy

Includes Recording and gorgeous Workbook of transformational processes 
Enroll HERE

 

 

Copyright (c) 2022 Emma K. Viglucci. All rights reserved.

 

Want to Use this Article in Your Own Website or Publication?

Be our guest! Here is how, you MUST include:
Emma K. Viglucci, LMFT is the Founder and Director of Metropolitan Marriage & Family Therapy, PLLC, a private practice that specializes in working with couples, she is the creator of the MetroRelationship™ philosophy and the Successful Couple Strategy™ that assist couples succeed at their relationship and their life. Stay Connected™ with Emma and receive weekly connection notes in your inbox with Personal Development and Relationship Enrichment insights and strategies, visit: www.metrorelationship.com

Connection Habits help enhance or rekindle love… (VIDEO)

Connection Habits help enhance or rekindle love… (VIDEO)

Happy Love Month! This is when things can begin to look up. It is up to us to grab the possible new vibe… It is up to us to create a new vibe… Will you continue to feel exhausted, burnt out, unmotivated and blah?

Or will you replenish yourself with a rich Self-Love Practice and set the right tune for the year? Will you generate lovely notes to fill your heart and share it with others? Will you be open to giving and receiving more love in your relationship? Connection Habits help enhance or rekindle love… 

Partners operate as if once they have a commitment from each other that the relationship box can be checked off.

Because we finally found our Soulmate (our best possible match for us now with all the potential in the universe), it doesn’t mean that we can now move on to other projects or life endeavors…

This is the furthest thing from what we should be doing (yes, I’m using the word should– that’s how important this is!). If we don’t make a commitment to be fully invested in our relationship from now till we choose otherwise, we won’t have a choice about it eventually… If we don’t invest in our relationship, if we don’t nurture it, it could get so bad we’d be running for the hills, or living a very unhappy life…

Our relationship is like a garden, if we don’t water it, it withers and dies…

Most partners have no clue how to Nurture their relationship, especially if they are struggling or going through a slump. Nurturing our relationship doesn’t have to be this illusive concept and challenging effort…

The easiest way to strengthen your bond, deepen your connection, and enhance or rekindle your love is through Connection Habits.

 

Connection Habits

When partners think about how to improve or uplevel their relationship, they often find themselves at a loss.

There are many factors at play in our relationship that make it challenging for us to figure out where to start to make things better… A lot of times our efforts are Band-Aids on dirty wounds. Even the best of intentions are taken the wrong way and do more harm than good. But this is not as hopeless as it seems. The key is to first plant a flag to stop spinning, and then go from there.

What is this flag? This has to do with having a Relationship Enrichment Mindset™… If our mindset is messed up about our relationship (or relationships in general!) and about our partner, we are starting off on the wrong foot. Therefore, the best thing to do is to address our mindset… 

With an upgraded relationship mindset, the universe is the limit!

Once we’ve cleaned ourselves up and have donned clean lenses, we are ready to play with the rest of the relationship, including integrating Connection Habits to nurture the relationship and our partner…  

We can build any habits in our life including Connection Habits to Nurture our relationship!

 

I. Connection Habits for Strengthening Your Bond

Your Bond is the Essence of your relationship. This is what makes you feel like you are in a relationship, that you belong, that you are not alone, that somebody has your back, that you are a Partnership.

Connection Habits in this area have to do things like staying in touch, checking-in, sharing, debriefing, doing caring or caretaking activities.

II. Connection Habits for Deepening Your Connection

After a while relationships tend to go south or flat if the partners have not intentionally addressed concerns and patterns and if they haven’t nurtured each other and the relationship. It is very easy to feel disconnected from our partner. We might go through the basic motions of being in a relationship, but if the interactions remain superficial based on the mundane we start to feel less connected…

Connection Habits in this area have to do with having deeper and more meaningful interactions like processing triggers, discussing life, sharing desires, wishes, dreams, developing traditions, having planning sessions

III. Connection Habits for Enhancing or Rekindling Your Love  

If we neglect the relationship and our partner, the love does fade away (sorry, don’t shoot the messenger!)… Love is a verb, it is not a noun… When we are not loving we can’t feel love… For us to feel the love for our partner, we have to cultivate it. The more we cultivate the more we harvest… This is also true for if you are not feeling romantic love for your partner or if you believe you “fell out of love”…

Connection Habits in this area have to do with doing the loving, wooing, and charming gestures that are fun or romantic, spark joy, create memories, have a ritualistic aspect, touches the other’s heart, makes the other feel special and cherished…

 We can easily stay on a path to creating a successful relationship and epic love with our partner by intentionally and systematically being nurturing with Connection Habits…

 

Watch the video for inspiration on establishing Connection Habits… Enjoy!

 

MONTHLY THEME GUIDE: Dating Your Partner

APPLICATION: This Month of Love step up your game nurturing your relationship and your partner.

💗Depending on the current state or feel of your relationship, decide where your relationship could use an infusion of Connection Habits:

• Strengthening Your Bond
• Deepening Your Connection
• Enhancing or Rekindling your Love

You can add one habit per category for a balanced approach, or focus on one of the categories with more habits to really upgrade that area. 

💗Decide what kind of feelings you’d like to feel and what kind of feel you’d like the relationship to have, and design your habit/s with the intention of generating those feelings.

💗Integrate the habit/s into your daily, weekly, monthly routines to automate nurturing your relationship…

Have fun design and integrating habits that tickle your hearts!

It doesn’t have to take work to nurture your relationship and show your partner love. Implementing a Connection Habits Tactic takes all the effort out of creating a loving and joyous relationship!

 

Here is to much connection and love this month and the rest of the year!

Wishing you all the joy, connection and love today and always…

With Much Love & Light!

 

 

PS: If you missed the Self-Love Masterclass, you can still get it through our Member Center with a Lifestyle Membership!

A Self-Love Strategy for Creating Your Best Life
Stop Self-Sabotage, Increase Resilience, and Generate More Joy
Includes Recording and gorgeous Workbook of transformational processes 
Enroll HERE

 

Copyright (c) 2022 Emma K. Viglucci. All rights reserved.

 

Want to Use this Article in Your Own Website or Publication?

Be our guest! Here is how, you MUST include:
Emma K. Viglucci, LMFT is the Founder and Director of Metropolitan Marriage & Family Therapy, PLLC, a private practice that specializes in working with couples, she is the creator of the MetroRelationship™ philosophy and the Successful Couple Strategy™ that assist couples succeed at their relationship and their life. Stay Connected™ with Emma and receive weekly connection notes in your inbox with Personal Development and Relationship Enrichment insights and strategies, visit: www.metrorelationship.com

Embracing Self-Connection and Radiance (VIDEO)

Embracing Self-Connection and Radiance (VIDEO)

As we are wrapping up January and turn towards the month of Love, things begin to look up… The mad pressure to hit the ground running in January and kicking off the year with a bang, is now behind us.

We can now truly embrace more self-compassion and set the right tone for the upcoming year… As we’ve been trying to be gentler with ourselves despite the New Year pressure, today’s Self-Love aspect drives this point home- let’s Embrace Self-Connection and Radiance.

Self-Connection is one of the 4 Aspects of Self-Love we are working on to help us start the New Year right…

Self-Honoring and Being
Self-Management and Flow
Self-Care and Resilience
Self-Connection and Radiance

Self-Connection is about having a strong relationship with ourselves- with fully knowing and accepting all our parts, with having our own back, with being more present, with keeping our own company, with nurturing ourselves.

When we are connected with our Self, we are never alone…
When we are connected with our Self, we are knowing…
When we are connected with our Self, we are purposeful…
When we are connected with our Self, we are inspired…
When we are connected with our Self, we are radiant…

When we are connected with our Self, we are steady, powerful, unstoppable, brilliant…

This is the state we want to cultivate, as this is the Sparkle in our life. This is how our Journey is more than a grind…

 

Self-Connection and Radiance

Being in Connection with our Highest Self is our Soul’s directive if you may… When we are not in connection with our Self, we are banging around grinding through our life in our meat suit, aimlessly and exhaustingly, till we are six feet under. This is not the way to live!

When we are in Connection with our Highest Self, we embody our full Being, pursue our calling, embrace a full Human Experience that includes intentionally evolving… This is how we Radiate our Brilliance…

This is what makes us unique, special, magnificent, extraordinary, and exceptional. This is who we really are… Let’s embrace ourselves once and for all, shall we?

I. Fully knowing and accepting all our parts

We are complex human beings that have many parts that make up who we are. Not only do we have different aspects to our conscious self that make up our personality, but we have all sorts of parts that are subconscious that we are not aware of. These parts make up the bulk of who we are, and are the puppeteers behind the scenes… It behooves us to learn ourselves better in all regards to become more whole and who we truly are…

II. Having our own back

Nobody cares more about ourselves than ourselves… When we don’t love ourselves well enough, or take care of ourselves, that’s what we put out and that’s the kind of relationship/s and life we create… When we are not in touch with our Self and our needs, we don’t have our own back and therefore we feel alone and ravished…

It behooves us to own our needs and take care of them to ensure we are OK and have the opportunity to play full out…

III. Being more present

We are so used to all the noise in our lives that the mere thought of silence freaks us out. And, this is for the external world. The same goes for our internal world. We are SO noisy inside our heads.

We are even noisy in our bodies… How we set up our experience and environments, the information we consume, the thoughts we choose to have, and even the food and other substances we choose to consume all generate different levels of noise… This distracts us from our Self…

It behooves us to quiet down and become more present to authentically show up and be available for our life…

IV. Keeping our own company

 Most people can’t stand it to be alone or to do things alone. And, if we are alone, we are super engaged with busyness and the noise we create in our lives… We don’t know how to keep our own company and savor being with ourselves. We miss out on the opportunity of enjoying our own company and experiencing our Beingness. We squander the opportunity for connecting more deeply with ourselves and truly knowing ourselves…

It behooves us to have experiences by ourselves to fully take them in, savor them and enrich more who we are…

V. Nurturing ourselves

 Nurturing ourselves is how we show ourselves we know we are special. It’s a form of personal validation. When we neglect, or even mistreat ourselves, we sabotage our Human Experience and create a much more challenging life than is necessary…

If we don’t resource ourselves, but are constantly depleting ourselves instead, how are we to have a life full of energy, vitality, health, wellness, and longevity? Most don’t take care of the basic needs, never mind going the extra mile to make the Journey more exquisite…

It behooves us to sprinkle in the luxuries and the treats for a fuller Human Experience…

Self-Connection is the most neglected aspect of our Self-Love Practice and such a detriment to our wellbeing, our ability to create our Best Life and have our Best Human Experience…

 

Watch the video for more on these 5 Tactics to help you more easily embrace Self-Connection… Enjoy!

 

MONTHLY THEME GUIDE: Identifying Core Values

APPLICATION: If Self-Love was a cake, it’d be made of the first 3 Aspects (Self-Honoring, Self-Management, and Self-Care), and it would have Self-Connection as the icing. This is what makes the whole thing. 😋

We all need to have our cake to live a delicious life, a life well lived!

Review which Tactic in this Aspect resonates the most for you and complete the related process below…

I. Fully knowing and accepting all our parts – In your Journal, on a clean page, draw a circle. Divide the circle into 8 equal slices using horizontal, vertical, and diagonal lines, for a pizza effect.

In each slice capture different Parts of yourself, not roles you have but personality-like parts. Try to capture as many sides of yourself as possible, negative and positive, that you can see. Group characteristics as you see fit.

Here is a working example:

1. Ambitious, proactive, conscientious, determined
2. Relator, connector, compassionate, caring
3. Adventurous, courageous, outgoing, friendly
4. Distrusting, controlling, micromanaging, rigid
5. Proud, sensitive, independent, lone-wolf
6. ?
7. ?
8. ?

Then, identify what Parts you would like to have that you don’t already have or don’t recognize in yourself and add them to any available slices.

Finally, create two new Habits: One to counter a negative characteristic you’d like to eliminate, and another to cultivate a positive characteristic you’d like to embrace… This is how we own and evolve ourselves…

II. Having our own back – In your Journal, capture a stream of consciousness about your state- how you are feeling, what’s working, what’s not working, what pleases you, what annoys you and the like… Write for a couple of pages until you feel you have captured your current state (+/- a couple of days…). Go back to what you wrote and identify any themes.

What do they have to do with:

-Your mood, energy, bandwith, stamina? (Wellness)
-Connection, intimacy, love, support, appreciation? (Connection)
-Your productivity, finances, impact? (Success)

Now, select the theme that is torturing you the most and address it with a conversation, new habit, environment tweak, additional support, etc. Make sure you address whatever need is screaming for attention.

III. Being more present – In your Journal, capture a day in the life (your life obviously). Then review it for your level of presence throughout the day…

-Do you have any mindfulness practices
-Do you take intentional breaks?
-Do you protect your focus from distractions?
-Do you make time to connect and attune with loved ones?
-Do you check-in with yourself about how you are doing and what you might need?
-Do you consume inspiring and positive content?
-Do you consume clean and nutritious food?
-Do you minimize the noise in your life?

Rate yourself from 1-10 for how present you are daily, with 10 being super present (quite…).

Commit to increasing your score by a certain amount by a certain time, and identify a change you’ll make to achieve it: Routine tweak, new habit, better boundaries, more support, etc.

IV. Keeping our own company – Unless you are a complete introvert, you most likely have a hard time being alone… And this is true if you are an introvert as well where even if you are alone you are otherwise engaged… You are not keeping your own company…

When we are in constant interaction, with others and otherwise engaged, we don’t get to know, see and honor our Self… We don’t get to Connect with our Self…

Take stock of how often you keep your own company… Where you are engaging with your Self… I bet it’s almost never…

Let’s change that!

-Select a time in your weekly routine where you have Me Time…
-Block off this time, create a recurring event for it, and protect it going forward…
-Make a list of activities, you’d like to do by yourself keeping your own company…
-Ahead of time, pull from this list to do during your Me Time. Complete any planning if your activities requires any scheduling, setting up, etc. This can be part of your Reset for the upcoming week.

Make sure nothing gets in the way of having an amazing time with You!

V. Nurturing ourselves – And this is the Sparklers on our cake! From the first Tactic in the first Aspect to this point, the focus has primarily been on making sure we honor and take care of ourselves well and to the fullest extent to ensure we can do famously in our Journey…

This Tactic is about adding more joy, fun, experiences and indulgences to make the journey more worthwhile!

-Make a list of the little things that give you joy.

Here are a few of mine that I grabbed from just my morning routine…

• Water, supportive water bottles
• Transcendental affirmations
• Meditation, spa eye pillow, infrared heating pad
• Exercising, gym, yoga
• Yerba mate, herbal tea, spiced warm lemon water, ACV (apple cider vinegar)
• Learning and consuming inspiring content
• Tibetan flute and nature sounds playlist, Tibetan bowl, gong
• Diffuser with aromatherapy oils, aromatherapy candles, incense, sage, palo santo
• Journaling, visioning, planning
• Fresh flowers

-Then, make a list of experiences you want to have, Bucket List like.

-Finally, make a list of indulgences, little and big luxuries, you want to add to your life.

Depending on your lifestyle and Practice, choose a good place to start for you:

-Adding little touches to your daily routine and life 
-Scheduling monthly experiences during your monthly resets
-Planning the integration of more little and big luxuries into your life    

Use these Tactics to keep things fresh and recharged in your life!

 

Voila! This brings us to the conclusion of our Self-Love Practice. We have covered a lot of ground in the past few weeks. You now have 20 Targeted Tactics to help you embrace a Self-Love Practice and help you upgrade your life!

A Self-Love Practice allows us to have better relationships with others…. More about creating amazing relationships next month!

Wishing you much joy, connection and love today and always…

With Much Love & Light!

 

PS: WEBINAR MASTERCLASS!

A Self-Love Strategy for Creating Your Best Life-

Stop Self-Sabotage, Increase Resilience, and Generate More Joy

Includes Recording and gorgeous Workbook of transformational processes!

Register Here

 

 

 

Copyright (c) 2022 Emma K. Viglucci. All rights reserved.

 

Want to Use this Article in Your Own Website or Publication?

Be our guest! Here is how, you MUST include:
Emma K. Viglucci, LMFT is the Founder and Director of Metropolitan Marriage & Family Therapy, PLLC, a private practice that specializes in working with couples, she is the creator of the MetroRelationship™ philosophy and the Successful Couple Strategy™ that assist couples succeed at their relationship and their life. Stay Connected™ with Emma and receive weekly connection notes in your inbox with Personal Development and Relationship Enrichment insights and strategies, visit: www.metrorelationship.com

Pin It on Pinterest