Did you know that the better you feel, the easier and more joyful your life becomes? Whether you look at this in terms of having high vibrations and attracting other high vibration experiences in your life.
Or, if you look at this as when you feel well, you have more energy, you have more patience, you have more bandwidth and such to apply to your life. Or just as, feeling well is all that matters. The important point is that we want to feel well, happy. The better we feel, the better. Here is to feeling better by Embracing Gratitude (Thanksgiving Series Pt2).
There are a multitude of ways to make ourselves feel better, but what better way this Season than with: Grace, Gratitude, and Generosity…
Not only are these amazing character strengths to embrace and rejoice with during the Holidays Season, but they are great character strengths to develop and embrace all year around. These are great characteristics to cultivate through our personal development work for increased wellbeing…
Today in Part2, we’ll focus on Embracing Gratitude. 🙏
Embracing Gratitude is a wonderful antidote for dispelling fear, anxiety, anger and the like. Our brain can’t be in a triggered state and in a gratitude state at the same time…
This is one of the reasons we start all our sessions with Appreciations. Where the partners get to share what they appreciate about the other and what the other has done or how they’ve been since the prior session.
Focusing on the yummy stuff also invites more yummy stuff. It reinforces that what the other is doing or how they are showing up is appreciated, which serves as a reward and incentive…
It sets a different tone to the session. There is a shift to a pro relationship mindset…
It curves the negativity bias and helps reprogram it…
And, other goodies…
All these benefits are just within the context of a therapy session, and within its first few minutes. Imagine what an impact appreciation and gratitude can have in your life as an ongoing practice…
For now, let’s Embrace Gratitude for the next few weeks by expanding your Gratitude Practice, and reap 3 coveted benefits in the process….
Watch the video to learn how to expand your Gratitude Practice and about the benefits you get as a result…
APPLICATION: The feeling of Gratitude is one of those super feelings that is easy to generate and has a wonderful impact on our wellbeing, our life, and the world at large… Embracing Gratitude with a Gratitude Practice built into our lifestyle is key to really integrate this potent elixir into our life.
Select one or more tactics below to really play with in the coming weeks:
Appreciation Habit – We tend to have negativity bias in how we view everything, especially our partner and our relationship… This is the worst thing to allow to flourish in your relationship if you are interested in creating a Radiant and Successful Relationship…
✨ Create a time in your daily routine where you get to spend a few minutes with your partner sharing appreciations about each other and acknowledging their investment in making your relationship, home and life more awesome.
Thankfulness Lens – First thing upon waking put on a Thankfulness Lens:
✨ Set the intention to notice the beauty in your life and world, see the positive and opportunities in situations, recognize the good intention behind your partner’s actions
✨ Be thankful for all these treasures
Honoring Differences – We live in a world where homogeneousness is valued, or rather where differences are not really tolerated… How about deciding not to contribute to polarizing views, believes, perspectives, actions and general approach to life?
✨ Notice where you are intolerant, prejudice, inflexible, judgmental and the like and decide now to widen your views and approach.
✨ Choose 3 behaviors you can integrate into your life to loosen the usual limiting grip and Transmute this wasted energy. This applies to political views, friendships, in-laws, children, and most importantly your partner… For example, stop begrudging your partner their wish for more separateness… Build-in more personal time into your lifestyle.
Embracing Gratitude is a wonderful sentiment to add to our Holidays Season and merriment. Additionally, being Grateful is a potent character strength that when harnessed within a Gratitude Practice it becomes a powerful tool for creating an amazing relationship and gorgeous life…
This one is a keeper!
Wishing you much joy, connection and love today and always…
With Much Love & Light!
PS –Check out past Holidays posts to help you Start Your Season Right!
Copyright (c) 2021 Emma K. Viglucci. All rights reserved.
Want to Use this Article in Your Own Website or Publication?
Be our guest! Here is how, you MUST include: Emma K. Viglucci, LMFT is the Founder and Director of Metropolitan Marriage & Family Therapy, PLLC, a private practice that specializes in working with couples, she is the creator of the MetroRelationship™ philosophy and the Successful Couple Strategy™ that assist couples succeed at their relationship and their life. Stay Connected™ with Emma and receive weekly connection notes in your inbox with Personal Development and Relationship Enrichment insights and strategies, visit: www.metrorelationship.com
Whoa, it’s that time of year again! As we start November, we are entering the Holidays Season and with them the inevitability of being stretched thin, overwhelmed, and stressed out. Unless of course, we are intentional and proactive about having a Zen Holidays and year-end… To help us cultivate our Zen this month, I’ll be doing a 3-part series covering Grace, Gratitude, and Generosity. Let’s start with: Giving Grace (Thanksgiving Series Pt1).
First off, why Grace, Gratitude and Generosity? Because I wanted to write on the theme of Thanksgiving and those three characteristics capture the essence of this holiday so nicely. Plus, they are a pretty set of Gs. 🤓 LOL
All kidding aside, these characteristics came to me for myself as I’m getting ready for my Holidays Season. I’ve been setting intentions and being proactive about my holidays for years now, and every year I’m inspired to add more simplicity, beauty, and Zen. My goal is to really be present and enjoy the simple pleasures bestowed by the magic of the season. ✨
🌟 Being easy about things 🌟 Letting go of perfectionism, annoyances, control and the like 🌟 Creating space for authenticity
We can give grace in all areas of our life – from how we treat ourselves, to how we operate in our business, to how we relate to our partner…
Learn how to apply this to your relationship!
Watch the video to learn how to give more grace in your relationship and how it helps create a major shift!
APPLICATION: Identify an area in your relationship where you experience a lot of frustration and pain. Then apply the 3-part lens to deconstruct your experience and embrace Giving Grace instead…
🌟Being easy about things – What do you wish in that area? What are your expectations? How do you communicate them? How do you go about making things happen or getting what you want?
🌟Letting go of perfectionism, annoyances, control – How do you look at what happens in that area? Where are you aiming for perfection? What do you let annoy you? How do you impose your way?
🌟Creating space for authenticity – How do you hold back, squash, your true essence? How do you silence yourself? How do you make yourself small? How do you so the same to your partner?
Now look at your answers and adjust the unrealistic expectations, rigidity, poor boundaries and mindset.
Revise your answers as to how you really want to be and show up…
When we embrace Giving Grace in the experience of our relationship and in our interactions with our partner, we soon notice that the relationship flows more smoothly, that there is less resistance from our partner, and that we feel more on the same page and connected.
Make Giving Grace a Holiday Intention™ this year!
Wishing you much joy, connection and love today and always…
Copyright (c) 2021 Emma K. Viglucci. All rights reserved.
Want to Use this Article in Your Own Website or Publication?
Be our guest! Here is how, you MUST include: Emma K. Viglucci, LMFT is the Founder and Director of Metropolitan Marriage & Family Therapy, PLLC, a private practice that specializes in working with couples, she is the creator of the MetroRelationship™ philosophy and the Successful Couple Strategy™ that assist couples succeed at their relationship and their life. Stay Connected™ with Emma and receive weekly connection notes in your inbox with Personal Development and Relationship Enrichment insights and strategies, visit: www.metrorelationship.com
The Holidays do all kinds of things to people. They provide a year-in-review, showcase our progress and success, spotlight our communion and belongingness, highlight our relationship dynamics, and nudge our very Soul for wakefulness. Add to this all the demands, expectations and hassle and bustle, and it is no wonder that the Holidays are rough for some.
The Holidays create stress, anxiety, depression, paralysis, withdrawal, mania, shame, overindulgence, overwhelm, crashing, loneliness, and other goodies. How do the Holidays affect you? If you generally fair well, still take note however minor the impact.
The Holidays can be treated as an opportunity for growth and healing… This is definitely fertile ground to work with! Why not take advantage of the opportunity available for the taking? When anything is framed as opportunity, its energy, meaning, impact and potential change. Now the situation is a gift and not a nuisance.
There is positivity built-in the reframe bearing optimism, strength, courage, hope, compassion, love, understanding, ownership, authenticity and awesomeness… Let’s shoot for getting more than just presents this Holiday Season!
Let’s go back to how the Holidays highlight our relationship dynamics. Whatever our dynamics they get amplified during this time. It’s as if our dynamics are on steroids. What you see, witness, experience is your usual dynamics to a heightened level.
This gives you an opportunity to better understand what usually bothers you and what doesn’t work that might have been difficult to pinpoint before. Before we knew interactions annoyed or hurt us. We knew are needs were not met. We complained, fought or sucked it up in hopelessness.
But now we have the chance at a magnified experience where we can see the crack. We have the chance to look at the crack up close and personal, and study it. We get the chance to see how it needs mending. The trick is to know what to look for: The theme, the broken record, and your script. What keeps replaying?
What is the lesson you are to learn? What is the code you need to crack? How are you to stretch to grow and heal, to break the impasse? This is the driver behind the dissatisfaction. Your call to action is to do something different for that in and of itself is Change…
It’s time to shake things up. It’s time to take a risk.It’s time to have better expectations. It’s time to raise the bar. It’s time to honor your Self, to Be your Authentic Self, and to bring it to your interactions. It’s time to be courageous and not be afraid of what could be. It’s time to go for it. It’s time for the next book in the series.
What does this look like? How do you go about it? It’s actually quite marvelous and simple. All you have to do is have a different response than your usual in your interaction. And, to do this for your Self without any outcome, expectation or intention of changing your partner in mind… So if you usually complain, call things out, whine or other some such in your interactions, your different response could be not say anything or to focus on the positive.
If your usual way is to suck it up, keep the peace, avoid conflict, and cave in, then your difference response could be standing up for your Self, speaking up, sharing what you are experiencing, or setting a limit or consequence.
The point here is not to go about changing your whole relationship, getting better results, inviting your partner to respond differently, and the rest of our usual intentions. This one is the mother load. This one goes for the jugular. This approach is for Us. Can you imagine? For Us… It is to build the muscle that has been dormant and which upon awakening saves the day…
Give it a try. Be gentle. Be courageous. Bring out the part of your Self that has been screaming to come out. Make space for it. Create safety for it. Nurture it. And take a leap of Faith, use it in your interactions. Go for it. Give it a try. The pay off is unimaginable…
Complete the MetroRelationship™ Assignment below to help you effortlessly implement this, make changes and immediately start experiencing your awesome relationship, and Authentic Life…
Happy Awakening!
~ Your MetroRelationship™Assignment
Take a look at the weeks ahead. What significant events or plans are coming up? How will you be celebrating? What traditions will you follow? What rituals will you enjoy? Sit with the plans and the answers above… Hold them in your heart. Suspend judgment.
Are your plans in alignment with your core beliefs? Does your celebrating honor your Authentic Self? Do your traditions transmit your values? Do your rituals strengthen your identity, sense of Self, connections and bonds. Do they impart love, acceptance and adoration? Do they embrace our Human Experience…?
Connect with what comes up for you as you explore this. Where do you need to show up differently? What concrete change will you make for your next event or plans? Put it in action now… Add this to your Tool Kit…
Copyright (c) 2016 Emma K. Viglucci. All rights reserved.
Want to Use this Article in Your Own Website or Publication?
Be our guest! Here is how, you MUST include: Emma K. Viglucci, LMFT is the Founder and Director of Metropolitan Marriage & Family Therapy, PLLC, a private practice that specializes in working with couples, she is the creator of the MetroRelationship™ philosophy and a variety of Successful Couple™ content that assist couples succeed at their relationship and their life. Stay Connected™ with Emma and receive weekly Connection Notes in your inbox with Personal Growth and Relationship Enrichment insights and strategies, visit: www.metrorelationship.com.
It saddens me to witness people’s struggles, to watch them get in their own way, to drown in a glass of water, to miss the bigger picture. Maybe this is compassion for my Self as I can certainly be in that place… This is one of the lessons I’m still learning.
This is part of my Journey. In its course I grow, heal, learn and further embrace my Calling… It is amazing to step back and take in the machinations, the alignments, and the perfection in how everything plays out, always for a reason… It all adds up…
At the end of the day, this brings me back to the sadness, compassion, for others for at least I can see the hidden gift, the blessing, and the opportunity. I draw strength and inspiration from this. This is what makes me a gifted healer and a leader in healing.
This is part of my Purpose… But for those who are not yet privy to this, all the tumultuousness of life is just pain. I can’t imagine not having the higher perspective. My heart truly goes out to those who struggle.
Having a higher perspective doesn’t exempt us from the happenings of life, and it is not always easy to hang on to it. But being able to see things from a different angle than merely seeing them as things happening to us makes a heck of a difference. This is where our human experience manifests.
Seeing the good in everything around us, even the so called “bad”, is where the opportunities abound, the promises lie, the gifts reside, the blessings are bestowed, the magic happens. This is where the beauty of the mystery of life can be found, if we can only but awaken…
Of course this applies to our relationship. Everything that happens in our relationship happens for a reason. The state of our relationship and everything that we get from our partner we have invited, we’ve co-created. Everything that goes on is a blessing, though sometimes a blessing in disguise.
When things are not to our liking or when we are in pain it is a sign that something different is needed. It is an opportunity to become intentional about our approach and our Being.
It is a call to realign, to stretch, to grow, to become whole and more empowered by adjusting our attitude, thoughts and behaviors. It is an opportunity to let go of Ego and defenses and to more fully embrace our Authentic Self. Thus creating the Awesomeness we wish and deserve.
This is why our Partner is a Gift to us. They provide the fertile playground where we get to play, stretch, develop, grow, heal, create and role model… Our interactions are blessings. They are all opportunities for us to embrace our human experience, and for us to be our Best Self.
In Relationship we have the opportunity to reach, embrace and engage our Authentic Self. Our directive is to look at everything through this lens and see where we need to stretch, grow and learn. It is ALL for us.
Everything happens for a reason. There are opportunities and blessings at every turn. Our job is to recognize them, to awaken to this Mystery and use it in our Journey. When we wake up and open our eyes, when we don the blessings lens on, and when we translate misfortune or aggravations into opportunities we recognize how Graceful and truly Bountiful life is. Go ahead, open your eyes, and be Thankful for all the Blessings in disguise.
Complete the MetroRelationship™ Assignment below to help you effortlessly implement this, make changes and immediately start experiencing your awesome relationship, and Authentic Life…
Happy Thanks Giving!
~ Your MetroRelationship™Assignment
Take the high road. Step away from your (overt or covert…) steadfast position on an impasse with your partner. Put on Your Enlightenment Lenses™. If you were to look at your situation from a transcended perspective, what would you see? How would you say the situation is prodding you to change? What are you being taught? What are you supposed to learn? How are you supposed to grow?
How is this inviting you to become your Best Self? How are you to stretch to get there? Sit with what comes up. Hold off resentment and other Ego driven feelings and thoughts. Hang in there. Weather the uncomfortableness… Hang with the new perspective. Take a moment to design two concrete behaviors that you will implement consistently to honor this call and step into your new reality… Add this to your Tool Kit…
Copyright (c) 2016 Emma K. Viglucci. All rights reserved.
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Want to Use this Article in Your Own Website or Publication?
Be our guest! Here is how, you MUST include: Emma K. Viglucci, LMFT is the Founder and Director of Metropolitan Marriage & Family Therapy, PLLC, a private practice that specializes in working with couples, she is the creator of the MetroRelationship™ philosophy and a variety of Successful Couple™ content that assist couples succeed at their relationship and their life. Stay Connected™ with Emma and receive weekly Connection Notes in your inbox with Personal Growth and Relationship Enrichment insights and strategies, visit: www.metrorelationship.com.
Our relationship and life are a reflection of the choices we make… I find that we make poor choices at almost every turn and then wonder how come our relationship and life are not as we’d prefer them to be… I find that we do not own our Self and our life, that we do not know who we are and what we are meant to do… I find that we do not take the time to design our relationship and our life.
I find that we are not intentional about creating the relationship and life we desire. I find that we do not Live in the moment and create a fabulous relationship, and life, in every moment…
We have a choice every moment on what to think, how to feel, what to focus on, what to work on, how to respond to things, what to do, what to add or remove from our life, how to set things up, etc. We do not intentionally exercise the power of choice. We mechanically and by default go through life… What an awful and unsuccessful way to Live!
It is time to create an Awesome Relationship and Authentic Life! It is time to implement the habits of highly successful people. This means being intentional about EVERYTHING. This means exercising your power to choose. This means owning, honoring, your Self…
Embrace these basic habits of highly successful people (as it relates to life and relationships):
1) Visualize and decide what kind of life and relationship you desire…
2) Have your relationship and life reflect your values
3) Have a plan and work it!
4) Create balance in your life
5) Manage your Self
6) Be open to feedback and act on it!
7) Work through rough stuff, don’t avoid it
8) Be courageous. Feel your fear, but take action anyway!
9) Create win-win situations (compromise)
10) Take educated risks
11) Address problems quickly and effectively, to resolution…
12) Be adaptable and embrace change
13) Be proactive, not reactive…
14) Be generous, compassionate and kind
15) Strive to always improve your communication and other relational skills
16) Be brutal about removing complaining and blaming from your repertoire
17) Focus on positives and strengths, efforts, contributions, gifts
18) Look for the lesson and stretch in everything; be always learning, healing, growing
19) Use your mind as a tool, your body as your home, your feelings as your compass
20) Be your Spiritual Self
It is time to create your Awesome Relationship and Authentic Life – show up to it, own it, design it, create it, live it!
Complete the MetroRelationship™ Assignment below to help you effortlessly implement this, make changes and immediately start experiencing your awesome relationship, and Life… Share your thoughts and progress on our blog page!
Happy Living!
~ Your MetroRelationship™ Assignment
Make a commitment to being the creator of your Awesome Relationship and Authentic Life.
Assert that you will exercise intentionality. That you will consciously choose at every turn.
Pick a Success Habit and implement it this week!
Add this to your Tool Kit…
Copyright (c) 2016 Emma K. Viglucci. All rights reserved.
Want to Use this Article in Your Own Website or Publication?
Be our guest! Here is how, you MUST include: Emma K. Viglucci, LMFT is the Founder and Director of Metropolitan Marriage & Family Therapy, PLLC, a private practice that specializes in working with couples, she is the creator of the MetroRelationship™ philosophy and a variety of Successful Couple™ content that assist couples succeed at their relationship and their life. Stay Connected™ with Emma and receive weekly Connection Notes in your inbox with Personal Growth and Relationship Enrichment insights and strategies, visit: www.metrorelationship.com.
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Emma K. Viglucci, LMFT has been in the mental health profession in varying capacities for the past 20+ years. She is the Founder and Director of metrorelationship.com a psychotherapy and coaching practice specializing in working with busy professional and entrepreneurial couples who are struggling getting on the same page and feeling connected. The work helps couples create a radiant and successful relationship and meaningful life by becoming a strong partnership and increasing their connection, intimacy, and fun. Emma is the creator of the MetroRelationship™ philosophy and the Successful Relationship Strategy™.
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