It is common for couples to be opposites also in their sexual styles! Like it’s not enough for the partners to be opposite in everything else… As we know opposites attract and this is one of the reasons partners appear to be so different from each other… This is not a bad thing, there are actually a host of benefits in being so different (opposite) from our partner… Though this might make couples feel they are not compatible, compatibility has nothing to do with the things the partners like to do… Real comparability goes way beyond that. Having different interests and liking different things is just something to manage, and this includes different sexual styles…
Sexual styles influence the partners’ expectations about their sex life, are the drivers behind their sexuality, and are a part of the filter for their sexual experience.
When the partners don’t identify their sexual styles and don’t intentionally work with them, they find themselves in a misalignment and out of sync. This fuels what we already know areculprits to low intimacy… Leaving the partners further struggling for joint pleasure, connection, and love…
But as with everything relationship, this doesn’t have to break your relationship… There is a way to get on the same page and create a mutually satisfying and terrific sex life with your partner regardless of your differences, and other intimacy concerns…
In today’s podcast episode I’m excited to have a very informative and reassuring conversation with Deborah Fox, Sex Therapist, about how conditioning and other factors affect libido and desire, how partners are usually also opposite in sexuality styles and what to do about it, reasons for difficulties with female orgasms and male erectile dysfunction and how to address them, the truth about sexual satisfaction when couples have been together a long time and in older couples, and how to maintain a healthy sexual relationship to ensure a mutually satisfying sex life… This is an episode not to be missed!
PSS: Do you need support taking yourself, your relationship, and your life to the next level- actually living a healthy, happy, harmonious and overall abundant life?
Copyright (c) 2024 Emma K. Viglucci. All rights reserved.
Want to Use this Article in Your Own Website or Publication? Be our guest! Here is how, you MUST include: Emma K. Viglucci, LMFT is the Founder and Director of Metropolitan Marriage & Family Therapy, PLLC, a private practice that specializes in working with couples, she is the creator of the MetroRelationship™ philosophy and the Successful Couple Strategy™ that assist couples succeed at their relationship and their life. Stay Connected™ with Emma and receive weekly connection notes in your inbox with Personal Development and Relationship Enrichment insights and strategies, visit: www.metrorelationship.com.
Some might believe they love unconditionally, because they believe that’s what’s expected and what’s appropriate in love… But upon further inspection it is obvious that their love is conditional… Is there a right way to love? Should we love unconditionally? Or should we, what some might consider, be smart about it and love conditionally?
In my book, love has nothing to do with conditions…
Now, this doesn’t mean we put up with abusive situations, or situations that don’t honor who we are, or that don’t support our purpose and our life Journey… This also doesn’t mean we are to be doormats and have no expectations in our relationship… All these things could be true, and we could still love the other…
So, when people believe love is conditional on certain things, that doesn’t really add up because we can obviously love no matter what, codependence and other dynamics and conditions aside…
But because we can love no matter what, it doesn’t mean we put up with a less than radiant and successful relationship… One that helps us become our best self… One that enriches us and makes our journey better…
~ We invest in cultivating our love, so it doesn’t get tied up with conditions and eroded by unmet expectations…
~ We invest in creating the best relationship to support and help expand our love…
This means we create the perfect space for our love. And this doesn’t mean a perfect relationship- there is no such thing. But it means a relationship in progress to its fullest potential…
Now this is journey worth investing in- playing in this realm and experiencing the rewards it yields is one of the best feelings… It’s so satisfying and fulfilling to take the interactions to the next level where both partners feel fully heard, understood, and accepted. Where they feel appreciated for who they are and what they contribute to the relationship and the other’s life. Where they feel deeply connected, and nourished and enlivened by their interactions.
Let’s commit to playing in the realm of having a relationship in progress to its fullest potential, where our love can thrive and shine…
PSS: Do you need support taking yourself, your relationship, and your life to the next level- actually living a healthy, happy, harmonious and overall abundant life?
Copyright (c) 2024 Emma K. Viglucci. All rights reserved.
Want to Use this Article in Your Own Website or Publication? Be our guest! Here is how, you MUST include: Emma K. Viglucci, LMFT is the Founder and Director of Metropolitan Marriage & Family Therapy, PLLC, a private practice that specializes in working with couples, she is the creator of the MetroRelationship™ philosophy and the Successful Couple Strategy™ that assist couples succeed at their relationship and their life. Stay Connected™ with Emma and receive weekly connection notes in your inbox with Personal Development and Relationship Enrichment insights and strategies, visit: www.metrorelationship.com.
Fortunately, there is a way to turn our relationship around even if it feels like it’s over and nothing seems to work to change things… I know because I’ve done this in my own relationship and because my work has helped countless couples do the same.
This has to do with investing in our own growth and evolution. It has to do with being openminded, understanding and compassionate. It has to do with being all in and doing what it takes to create what we want.
It is not about staying in our relationship at our own expense, sucking it up and having an ok relationship and mediocre life.
It’s about gently and loving investing in our relationship every day. It’s about showing up. It’s about creating a win-win-win.
It’s not about being right and proving or making our partner wrong… Nobody wins when we do that…
This is the kind of mindset that helps us get unstuck, stay the course, and create awesomeness…
This mindset is expanded in the first Element of our Successful Relationship Strategy™. Where the partners align in being Allies and not adversaries…
The Strategy has 5 Elements that when attended to help get partners- get unstuck in their relationship, improve your communication, change your patterns and relationship dynamics, increase your connection, intimacy and fun, and create a strong partnership and amazing life:
Element1 – Context & Mindset: Break the impasse Element2 – Communication & Alignment: Get on the same page Element3 – Clarity & Dynamics: Change patterns Element4 – Connection & Intimacy: Rekindle love Element5 – Collaboration & Partnership: Support each other
In today’s recording, I share more about Element 1 and embracing a Relationship Enrichment Mindset… In a nutshell, I cover:
A new mindset
Self-empowerment
Enrichment Lifestyle
Hope this information serves you and helps you get on the path to your Successful Relationship.
PSS: Do you need support taking yourself, your relationship, and your life to the next level- actually living a healthy, happy, harmonious and overall abundant life?
Copyright (c) 2023 Emma K. Viglucci. All rights reserved.
Want to Use this Article in Your Own Website or Publication? Be our guest! Here is how, you MUST include: Emma K. Viglucci, LMFT is the Founder and Director of Metropolitan Marriage & Family Therapy, PLLC, a private practice that specializes in working with couples, she is the creator of the MetroRelationship™ philosophy and the Successful Couple Strategy™ that assist couples succeed at their relationship and their life. Stay Connected™ with Emma and receive weekly connection notes in your inbox with Personal Development and Relationship Enrichment insights and strategies, visit: www.metrorelationship.com.
We love summer and all the fun that usually comes with it. But we can make it even better while making our relationship even better. That’s right, we can enhance our lifestyle while enriching our relationship. Yes, you can do all the usual summer activities, time off, and vacations. But you can also create a couple summer fun tradition and end the summer with a bang.
This rich experiences not only create beautiful moments at the time they take place but provide additional opportunities for connection before and after, as well as a host of other benefits that make traditions special… Of course, being intentional about how one shows up and about savoring it makes a big difference for how we experience it, what meaning we give it, and how we remember it.
~Before the actual tradition is to take place there is the forethought, planning and anticipation of it that can be milked in and of themselves… The dreaming, designing and putting it together offer opportunities to connect, learn each other better, and address needs and desires.
~After the experience took place, there are the memories that were created to draw future enjoyment from… Revisiting the moments captured in our minds and digitally for posterity sake, sharing it with others, and recounting the event and experience make this the gift that keeps on giving…
Traditions Are a Great Relationship Building Tool
Traditions are the thread that weave the family / relationship tapestry…
They:
Create identity, unity, and a sense of belonging
Convey, and pass down, values, principles, beliefs, and customs
Provide comfort and connection
Offer meaningful pause and reflection
Help celebrate, honor, and give thanks
Promote fun and good vibes
All these benefits make traditions and important aspect of our lifestyle and family life.
This brings me to using these more specifically to enrich our relationship.
Couple Summer Fun Tradition
Traditions can be used throughout the year in our family life and in our relationship. We usually have them during holidays and other celebrations. But we might not have them so much as part of changing seasons and during other times in our life.
So, for this writing I want to offer to create a couple summer fun tradition as another way to invest in your relationship – to enrich your relationship and to enhance the connection with your partner.
How might you go about building a couple summer fun tradition?
~ Think about as aspect of summer that you love- an activity, a sport, an outing, a type of food, an event, a location, etc…
~ Think about an “event” that can be created around it that can be replicated every summer. For example, I love seafood- so every summer we get all kinds of shellfish and have special meal that we call having our “seafood feast day”. And we add all the trimmings and treats we both enjoy making it as yummy as possible and treating ourselves to that joint enjoyment.
Now it’s your turn! Select something about summer that you’ll turn into a couple summer fun tradition to end the summer with a bang…
PSS: Do you need support taking yourself, your relationship, and your life to the next level- actually living a healthy, happy, harmonious and overall abundant life?
Copyright (c) 2023 Emma K. Viglucci. All rights reserved.
Want to Use this Article in Your Own Website or Publication? Be our guest! Here is how, you MUST include: Emma K. Viglucci, LMFT is the Founder and Director of Metropolitan Marriage & Family Therapy, PLLC, a private practice that specializes in working with couples, she is the creator of the MetroRelationship™ philosophy and the Successful Couple Strategy™ that assist couples succeed at their relationship and their life. Stay Connected™ with Emma and receive weekly connection notes in your inbox with Personal Development and Relationship Enrichment insights and strategies, visit: www.metrorelationship.com.
As the Love Month is coming to an end, our attention is now to focus on carrying on with the love theme… As being kind, loving and romantic for one month out of the year just won’t cut it…
To create an amazing relationship, we must be amazing partners… It is common to get sidetracked with the business of life and to neglect, or lose focus on, our partner and our relationship. Let’s set ourselves up to change this as our relationship is the cornerstone of our life! Follow these 3 powerful steps to take your relationship to the next level.
Of course, I’m assuming you are interested in becoming your Best Self, in being the Best Partner, in creating your Best Relationship, and living your Best Life. If you are satisfied with everything as it is and don’t want to continue to evolve and see how awesome you can make things, then we are not your cup of tea- and that’s ok.
Our content and work are geared for partners and couples who are high achievers and performers and who want to take full advantage of what this life has to offer. They want to crack the codes and win at the game of life… They want to have a radiant and successful relationship…
If you are with us, take these 3 powerful steps to keep the love alive and keep enriching and nurturing your relationship. Let’s take your relationship to the next level…
The 3 Powerful Steps
We can only create the relationship and life we desire when we are intentional and proactive about it. An epic love affair with our partner, keeping the love and spark alive, and creating a meaningful life don’t happen by accident or by default…
The relationship and life we desire need to be designed and then created…
It’s funny to me when people ask, Should having a great relationship require work? The answer is a resounding, YES! But note that I don’t look at it as work though, you see… I look at anything relationship related as relationship enrichment, nurturing, tending, minding, creating and the like- and it’s lovely to do!
You wouldn’t go about building a house without designing it and having a blueprint first, would you? The following steps help with the design and the blueprint…
STEP 1 – The State of the Union…
In this step, the idea is to assess how your joint life and relationship are going. You’d first review the overall quality of your life and relationship, and then specific aspects of them.
You can assess the things that are important to you now. There are seasons in life and in our relationship. Different things are important to us at different times.
You might already have done a tremendous job improving, enriching, and enhancing the quality of your life and relationship so a higher-level assessment would be in order for you. You might already have a great relationship and life, but do you want to have an extraordinary one? How is your lifestyle, your legacy, your impact?
And, if you are struggling in your relationship and your life, you’ve come to the right place. You’d assess personal characteristics, mindset, skills, habits, self-management, resilience, and strategies both at the personal and relational level that affect how you go about creating your relationship and life…
You’d also assess your relationship mindset, communication and alignment, dynamics and patterns, connection and intimacy, collaboration and partnership…
What have you been working on and why?
STEP 2 – How Far You’ve Already Come…
It is common for us to lose sight of the Journey we’ve been on, how much we have already accomplished, how far we’ve already come personally and with our partner…
In this step the focus is on acknowledging all the hurdles, all the challenges, all the difficulties we’ve been through and how we’ve managed to survive them and possibly even thrive because of them…
Here we get to give ourselves and the partnership credit for everything we have already addressed, fixed, resolved, learned, implemented, improved, and everything else. We don’t live in a vacuum, and we don’t live static lives. You have been on a Journey, you are better for it, alone and together. Grab all the yummy stuff that’s already here…
If you are having a difficult time finding the progress, the achievements, the successes – focus on all the attempts, efforts, and things you’ve tried to help you improve your lot. You have done plenty, believe me. Just give yourself and your partner credit for what you’ve already done.
Your efforts might feel like they were in vain, but they were not. They are all a part of you and who you are Becoming… Nothing is a waste… Grab all the investment you’ve put into your relationship and your life already…
Celebrate that you’ve been living your Journey…
STEP 3 – On to What’s Next…
You might have really enjoyed Step1 and Step2 and are really looking forward to this final step. Or, the first 2 steps felt like a 2×2 upside the head. Either way, this step helps you take things to the next level…
Here we get dust off our relationship and life blueprint… If you have been with us for a while, you might have your Life Vision handy… This is your North Star, your guiding mechanism.
Your vision doesn’t have to be written in stone, it can be revised, updated, and even overhauled as you go. But at any given time, you need to be striving towards something… Otherwise you are creating by default- and we don’t want that!
If you don’t have a Vision, now is the time to dream yours up… Make it a stretch, make it fun, make it meaningful… Cover all life areas- what would your Best Life look and feel like? What do you want to create? What’s your Partner’s role, contribution, and impact? How do you Co-Create?
This is what you want to build… This is what you want to create with your partner- Relationship and Life…
Take note of where you’d like to be, and how you’d like to be… What specific things or areas need attention?
Now that you have where you’ve been, where you are, and where you want to go you are ready to take your relationship, and life, to the next level…
APPLICATION: Now that Love Month is over, is time to set up for more Loving throughout the year… Take your relationship to the next level with a plan for working out the kinks and continuing your nurturing…
Set time aside to explore the steps for yourself, process them in your Journal, make a list of specific things that stand out, highlight the things of note:
STEP 1 – The State of the Union…Review the status and state of your relationship and your life. The overall feel and the specific areas. Take note of these as well: Relationship mindset, communication and alignment, dynamics and patterns, connection and intimacy, collaboration and partnership… What is your current area of focus, and why?
STEP 2 – How Far You’ve Already Come…Review and capture all the ups and downs in your relationship and your life. Identify the patterns, the lessons learned and the things you accomplished, addressed, and resolved. Give yourself credit for all the effort invested. Give yourself, and your partner, compassion for the Journey you are on.
STEP 3 – On to What’s Next…Review your Life Vision, or create one…, to serve as your North Star for going forward. Filter everything in your relationship and life against this Vision as you go to help streamline, focus, stay in alignment, and on the right path…
IMPORTANT: Schedule time to meet with your partner to share and get on the same page. Give them a heads-up beforehand so they are not blindsided and so they can do this exercise themselves or at least have given it some thought.
Grab these for your takeaway: ~ Areas of focus to smooth out kinks in the relationship ~ Adding/continuing relationship nurturing activities ~ Corrective measures to your lifestyle and goals/projects to course correct and better align with your vision
When you are intentional about what you are creating, you’ll create what you desire…
Wishing you all the joy, connection and love today and always…
With Much Love & Light!
PS: Masterclasses
If you missed this month’s Masterclass, or any previous ones, you can still get them through our Member Center with a Lifestyle Membership! Enroll HERE
This month’s Masterclass Relationship Enrichment Mini Retreat- Connect More Deeply, Rekindle Your Love Keeping the love alive is not easy. Relationship slumps are common, but they don’t have to do you in. Come learn how to recharge your relationship and rekindle your love. Includes Recording and gorgeous Workbook of transformational processes
Copyright (c) 2022 Emma K. Viglucci. All rights reserved.
Want to Use this Article in Your Own Website or Publication?
Be our guest! Here is how, you MUST include: Emma K. Viglucci, LMFT is the Founder and Director of Metropolitan Marriage & Family Therapy, PLLC, a private practice that specializes in working with couples, she is the creator of the MetroRelationship™ philosophy and the Successful Couple Strategy™ that assist couples succeed at their relationship and their life. Stay Connected™ with Emma and receive weekly connection notes in your inbox with Personal Development and Relationship Enrichment insights and strategies, visit: www.metrorelationship.com
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Emma K. Viglucci, LMFT has been in the mental health profession in varying capacities for the past 20+ years. She is the Founder and Director of metrorelationship.com a psychotherapy and coaching practice specializing in working with busy professional and entrepreneurial couples who are struggling getting on the same page and feeling connected. The work helps couples create a radiant and successful relationship and meaningful life by becoming a strong partnership and increasing their connection, intimacy, and fun. Emma is the creator of the MetroRelationship™ philosophy and the Successful Relationship Strategy™.
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