We have a new season, and Spring at that. With it comes the promise of fresh starts and new beginnings. As nature comes alive we let go of the gloomy, the sedentary, and the stale. Any new season or transitions actually bring with them the opportunity for new beginnings, but Spring is really special as we witness mother nature have its fresh start. This is a perfect moment to ride this wave of momentum for newness.
This is an opportunity to let of things that suffocate us, that unground us, and misalign us…
We can focus our “Spring Cleaning” in 3 main areas:
1~ Environments, routines, calendar, workload, projects, systems and such 2~ Relationship, family, friendships, community, networks 3~ Body, mind and spirit…
When we are cluttered and toxic in these areas we experience:
1~ Overload and exhaustion 2~ Conflict and disconnect 3~ Unwellness and disease
Then it behooves us to declutter, detox, and deprogram these areas to release any stuck energy and create bandwidth and space for the new…
For each area we can do an overhaul or a minor tweak, whatever makes sense for our life at this time.
Here are minor tweaks for immediate results:
1~ Clean out a few little spots in your environments that are cluttered 2~ Change your self-talk or interactions with your loved ones to have a more accepting, compassionate and kind tone 3~ Identity a trigger that still gets you and address it at the core- identify the driving need behind it and meet it yourself and through your relationship… (This is Couples Therapy at its best to change emotional programming…)
Of course, we can do so much in each of the above areas. And, you are welcome to do as much as your heart desires. Everything can stand to be revisited, streamlined, or spruced up… But know that even the littlest “spring cleaning” will create a refresh. Be wise about what you choose, go for what gives the largest impact… That gives the largest release and creates the most spaciousness…
We talked about clearing for your refreshing to allow the newness… But I’d like to go further with this and offer ways to ride the momentum of the freshness that’s in the air and to capitalize on your refresh to actually realize new beginnings…
And that is aligning with the sacredness of life for balance, flow, and aliveness…
The first way to do that is to honor and sync with the cycles of life: ~ nature’s seasons ~ lunar cycle ~ hormonal cycle
The second way is to embrace divine nourishing practices: ~ eat nutritious food, hydrate and sleep well… ~ relate authentically with openness and vulnerability… ~ pray, meditate, reflect…
When you create the spaciousness and infuse it with nourishment, you’ll get the aliveness, connection and upleveling you are seeking. This is how you uplevel your self, your relationship, and your life…
This refresh will quite down all the noise in your life… This quite, stillness, expands and elevates your consciousness, where you become more who you really are, one with Oneness. And this is the access point to accelerate the transformations, creations, manifestations, and realizations in your life… You have access to all you need… Just open up to this new realization and let the newnessflow in…
The only thing left in this process is to be really intentional about what kind of newness you want… And then take a first step towards creating something new… Towards creating a new beginning…
Here is to your refresh and all the newness you desire…
PSS: Do you need support taking yourself, your relationship, and your life to the next level- actually living a healthy, happy, harmonious and overall abundant life?
Copyright (c) 2024 Emma K. Viglucci. All rights reserved.
Want to Use this Article in Your Own Website or Publication? Be our guest! Here is how, you MUST include: Emma K. Viglucci, LMFT is the Founder and Director of Metropolitan Marriage & Family Therapy, PLLC, a private practice that specializes in working with couples, she is the creator of the MetroRelationship™ philosophy and the Successful Couple Strategy™ that assist couples succeed at their relationship and their life. Stay Connected™ with Emma and receive weekly connection notes in your inbox with Personal Development and Relationship Enrichment insights and strategies, visit: www.metrorelationship.com.
When we are looking to create change, uplevel, and make a move in our relationship and our life, we might find that we don’t know where to start. Or that we have tried all the things we know and ran out of ideas and so are feeling hopeless. Or that we feel so stuck we want to give up. Or that we know what we have to do but are too scared to take a first step or an action towards making a change. All this is part of the human experience when we are trying to better our situation, create what we desire and continue to evolve to the best version of ourselves…
But not to fret, even though this is part of the human experience, it doesn’t mean that we have to endure additional suffering. It doesn’t have to be hard at the end of the day.
If we were to actually fully own ourselves and not our partner or others, if we stayed in our circle. If we focused on honoring ourselves, our own evolution and growth, and how we show up to our relationship and our life instead of using excuses, victimizing ourselves and blaming others. We’d truly be empowered and able to create what we desire in all areas of our life…
What if we were to focus on keeping our side of the street clean… On showing up with our best self- resourced, self-regulated and soothed, boundaried, compassionate, attuned and kind and generous. Can you image how fast your interactions would shift? How fast your relationship would uplevel? I can, I see it day in and day out not only in my own relationship but in countless others with the couple therapy work we do.
What is some of the work to do?
~ Declutter your relationship and life perspective- clean up distorted thinking ~ Clear, deconstruct and deprogram patterns- heal and release old wounds and stuck emotions ~ Detox from defensive and reactive mechanisms- upgrade coping mechanisms and self-regulation ~ Reset stories, scripts and narratives- replace the victim with a victor mindset ~ Clean up your approach to your partner and your circumstances- try different tactics, skills and tools
When you let go of the old, the hurts, wounds, patterns, practices, habits, characteristics, and such, you create space to become more who you are- your better version of you, creating a refresh for the new to immerge in all areas of your life…
Here is to a replenishing and shifting refresh and to all the newness!
In today’s podcast episode, I have a lovely and fun conversation with Cinthia Hiett, also a relationship expert, where we discuss toxic interactions in relationship, dealing with an immature spouse or an immature partner, what codependency looks like in relationship and in the world, how to set boundaries, growing ourselves up and dealing with our inner child, and so much more.
PSS: Do you need support taking yourself, your relationship, and your life to the next level- actually living a healthy, happy, harmonious and overall abundant life?
Copyright (c) 2024 Emma K. Viglucci. All rights reserved.
Want to Use this Article in Your Own Website or Publication? Be our guest! Here is how, you MUST include: Emma K. Viglucci, LMFT is the Founder and Director of Metropolitan Marriage & Family Therapy, PLLC, a private practice that specializes in working with couples, she is the creator of the MetroRelationship™ philosophy and the Successful Couple Strategy™ that assist couples succeed at their relationship and their life. Stay Connected™ with Emma and receive weekly connection notes in your inbox with Personal Development and Relationship Enrichment insights and strategies, visit: www.metrorelationship.com.
As we are entering the season of cleaning, decluttering, cleansing, clearing, and detoxing for a refresh and to create space for newness, for a rebirth, we are faced with the choice of how much, if at all, we play with this. It is up to us how we choose to do our Journey. Are we proactive and victors, or are we passive and victims in our relationship and our life… Whatever our usual, we are still faced with a choice. If you are usually passive, here is a chance to step up your game.
And let me tell you, we can play full out or simply select an area to focus on and go about it gently. Whatever our style of doing things, we can honor that if that serves us or we can choose to change even that if we are looking to really uplevel our relationship and our life…
Usually how we do anything is how we do everything…
But we can empower ourselves and start making different choices. We can take more ownership and choose to do things differently, to change habits, to deprogram, to become our best self, the best partner, and the best human we can…
We can choose to stop being who we usually are (a collection of habits and patterns…) or at least relieve the parts that no longer serve us to uplevel ourselves. Things we’d address include our sensitivities, pet-peeves, coping mechanisms, defenses, reactions, and anything else that’s our go to…
Here is our chance to get rid of what we no longer want, what doesn’t work, what gets in our way and holds us back, what numbs, mutes, covers and snuffs us out… Anything that gets in the way of our authenticity, and our ability to be who we truly are…
We might have done a good amount of clearing (deprogramming and healing) already but have a bit more to do, or we might have not even started getting our house in order… This is where we get to choose how much we’ll tackle and where we want to focus.
Areas to focus on include but are not exclusive to:
We might not even know where to start, if we even want to, and never mind choosing how much to do. The whole thing might feel overwhelming.
Which brings me to what I want to offer today, and that is to check-in with yourself about this. Not to impetuously decide on something, as a reaction, from ego, or from the top of your head. Give yourself a chance to really get in touch with what investment would make the most sense for you. Where do you want to place your focus and energy to most move the needle forward.
To that end, a great solution for this is to practice Sitting in Silence…
Sitting in silence promotes:
Relaxation and stress relief
Calm and inner peace
Brain development
Physical healing
Mental health
Processing
Concentration and focus
Productivity
Learning
Self-awareness
Intuition
Creativity
Patience
Mindfulness
Sleep
As you get all these benefits, you’ll have a greater sense of where you need to place your focus and energy. You’ll know what areas need to be addressed first so you can leverage them for better and faster results, and ease…
And most importantly you’ll be doing the resourcing, deprogramming, and healing to begin with. You can’t go wrong! You’ll be already doing what you want to do before you even start doing it. Bam!
To draw the benefits of sitting in silence to support your refresh and help you create space for the new, be proactive about adding this to your daily routine… Put your devise away for a few minutes, and gift yourself this refresh for newness.
PSS: Do you need support taking yourself, your relationship, and your life to the next level- actually living a healthy, happy, harmonious and overall abundant life?
Copyright (c) 2024 Emma K. Viglucci. All rights reserved.
Want to Use this Article in Your Own Website or Publication? Be our guest! Here is how, you MUST include: Emma K. Viglucci, LMFT is the Founder and Director of Metropolitan Marriage & Family Therapy, PLLC, a private practice that specializes in working with couples, she is the creator of the MetroRelationship™ philosophy and the Successful Couple Strategy™ that assist couples succeed at their relationship and their life. Stay Connected™ with Emma and receive weekly connection notes in your inbox with Personal Development and Relationship Enrichment insights and strategies, visit: www.metrorelationship.com.
It is very easy to neglect our relationship and our partner, if we are not intentional about showing love, giving care, and investing in all the enriching ways… We live in a world where work is the priority… We spend more time working than we do taking care of our personal life and sharing time with our loved ones… The grind and the rat race are still very much alive. I had hoped that the pandemic would have made a larger impact in this regard. But old habits, social constructs and a deeply ingrained systems will obviously require a more sustained, compassionate, and cooperative approach to change… In the meantime, it is up to us to safeguard our bond and our relationship from the onslaught of life’s demands…
It is up to us to make a concerted effort, investment, in prioritizing our partner and our relationship. When we are not intentional the tentacles of chaos and other demands have free reign to reach into every crevice with an ounce of energy and snatch it up… Because of our programming and because of the world we live in, we allow this to happen. Other things appear more important in the moment to moment, until we are zapped and have nothing else to give.
But making a conscious and intentional decision to set up our routines, days, weeks, and months in a ways that build in the space, the time, the energy conservation, and mechanisms for having time for each other, for being resourced, for being present and available, and for being conscious and attuned, allows us to really be in relationship and enjoy our connection.
Going about our life and our relationship this way, allows for the Us to not only survive, but also thrive… It allows us to focus on what is important and to have the time and the energy for it. And, most importantly, it doesn’t allow for the rest of life to get in the way and wreak havoc.
When we do this reset and Alignment, we tap into the synergy inherent in our relationshipand are then better able to utilize it as the Life Partnership it is meant to be. It is our rock, our haven, our source of joy and so much more. It elevates it to its rightful place from which we can draw what we need to have our amazing life adventure and best Human Experience…
Embracing this relationship enrichment mindset and approach ensures our love is protected, nurtured, expanded, and everlasting… This is the abundance available to us if we just tune in and choose our partner everyday…
Being aware of how our current reality sets us up for the grind and disconnect, and how our systems reinforce separateness, competition, and lack, allows us to make different choices than if we blindly go along. And being proactive about collaborating in not allowing the machine to win, while being compassionate to those still under its spell, makes for an easier transition into more harmonious and joyful living.
Together we can conquer all…
In today’s episode, I have an enlightening and informative conversation with Dr. Jeffrey Dunne about the concept of interconnectedness, unity consciousness, and implications for a more harmonious and loving relationship and a more sustainable future…
PSS: Do you need support taking yourself, your relationship, and your life to the next level- actually living a healthy, happy, harmonious and overall abundant life?
Copyright (c) 2024 Emma K. Viglucci. All rights reserved.
Want to Use this Article in Your Own Website or Publication? Be our guest! Here is how, you MUST include: Emma K. Viglucci, LMFT is the Founder and Director of Metropolitan Marriage & Family Therapy, PLLC, a private practice that specializes in working with couples, she is the creator of the MetroRelationship™ philosophy and the Successful Couple Strategy™ that assist couples succeed at their relationship and their life. Stay Connected™ with Emma and receive weekly connection notes in your inbox with Personal Development and Relationship Enrichment insights and strategies, visit: www.metrorelationship.com.
It is not uncommon for relationships to experience an intimacy or sex drought. Where the partners are just not being as intimate as they would normally prefer. There is usually one partner that expresses less interest, but it can happen where both are just not into it. The partners might have different reasons for the lack of desire and interest. And they most likely have different libidos, desire levels, and preferences for timing, frequency, and duration of their physically intimate moments as well as what they entail… In other words, what kind of sex they like to have. It is a wonder that we even make babies, but that’s a different topic…
There is much intricacy in each of these factors making each couple unique in their experience and what kind of relationship they create. And even within the couple, the partners have very different experiences and ideas from each other about what is going on… Not for nothing this is a very sensitive, delicate, and complex situation for partners to address and be able to change.
The uniqueness of each partner in-and-of-itself plays a significant role. Two unique individuals coming together to create a joint life is no easy feat. All the differences that made the match of the partners so special in the first place now make an elaborate undertaking to align and synchronize for optimal bliss within the relationship…
The richness and gloriousness of what is a couple, and a relationship, gets lost on most people. There is so much going on that meets the eyes, and even more underneath it all.
Couples are super special. They are the coming together of two people to create a greater whole, a much larger One. This whole, the relationship is the vehicle through which we navigate and live our life. It is imperative that we take care of it so we can have a wonderful Journey…
What does this mean for our connection, intimacy, and sex life?
~ This means that we can’t allow ourselves to get sucked into our negativity bias, into our limiting believes and scripts, into righteousness, into poor communication hygiene and habits, into our reactions and defensive patterns, into complacency and denial, into competition, comparison and tit-for-tat. That we are mindful and intentional about how we do ourselves- who we choose to be and how we choose to show up.
Partners are on the same team! They are allies. Yet they might fall prey to seeing and treating each other as the enemy. This just compounds the difficulties and disconnect they might be experiencing…
~ This means that we choose to address anything that is getting in the way from our most epic relationship and love affair with our partner. That we choose to get medical attention and other services for anything physical or emotional affecting our health, wellbeing, and everything else.
~ This means that we address the circumstances affecting our relationship, our connection, our intimacy, our libido and our passion.
~ This means that we address any relationship issues or concerns, anything we are fighting about or that gets us, any egoic patterns, any relationship patterns, and anything that keeps us from getting along, getting on the same page, connecting deeply and meaningfully, from having the best sex, from really having fun with our partner, from creating the strongest partnership…
~ This means that we give some serious, and some playful, thoughts to our purpose, the meaning of our life, the kind of life we want to live, the type of human we want to be, the kind of legacy we want to impart, the kind of relationship we want to be a part of to help us sort through all this and enjoy the process…
I offer to not get hang up in the weeds of what is going on with your intimacy… I offer to take a larger view of your situation and how everything interconnects… You might be surprised as to what comes up to tweak to help all the dominos fall into place… All the above becomes so much easier and a pleasure to mitigate, address, deconstruct, and even transcend…
PSS: Do you need support taking yourself, your relationship, and your life to the next level- actually living a healthy, happy, harmonious and overall abundant life?
Copyright (c) 2024 Emma K. Viglucci. All rights reserved.
Want to Use this Article in Your Own Website or Publication? Be our guest! Here is how, you MUST include: Emma K. Viglucci, LMFT is the Founder and Director of Metropolitan Marriage & Family Therapy, PLLC, a private practice that specializes in working with couples, she is the creator of the MetroRelationship™ philosophy and the Successful Couple Strategy™ that assist couples succeed at their relationship and their life. Stay Connected™ with Emma and receive weekly connection notes in your inbox with Personal Development and Relationship Enrichment insights and strategies, visit: www.metrorelationship.com.
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Emma K. Viglucci, LMFT has been in the mental health profession in varying capacities for the past 20+ years. She is the Founder and Director of MetroRelationship.com a psychotherapy and coaching practice specializing in working with busy professional and entrepreneurial couples who are struggling getting on the same page and feeling connected. The work helps couples create a radiant and successful relationship and meaningful life by becoming a strong partnership and increasing their connection, intimacy, and fun. Emma is the creator of the MetroRelationship™ philosophy and the Successful Relationship Strategy™.
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