You know how when you fly, they say that in case of an emergency to first put on your oxygen mask and then assist others? Well, the same concept applies to the rest of our life… We have to take care of ourselves for us to be in good shape to be in relationship with our partner, and others…
When we embrace a self-love practice, in which there is a huge component of self-care, then we activate our authentic self, we create flow, we nourish and enliven ourselves. Now this is a Best Self… This self can have amazing energy, insights, patience, compassion, creativity and all the rest to be the best partner and lover. When we are unhealthy, weak, stressed, overwhelmed, tired and such, we don’t make very good company…
~ It is our job to make sure we are healthy and well.
~ It is our job we show up with our Best Self and we be the Best Partner.
~ It is our job to make sure we continue to evolve and elevate…
Upshift…
To this end, how we do everything matters. From the moment we are aware we are awake, and we choose our first thoughts of the day, to how we wrap up our day and settle down for a good night sleep, all have an impact on our health and wellness. On how resourced we are to be able to show up with our Best Self…
When we bang around life and are noisy and scattered and tapped out, we are not fresh, available, and able to have meaningful, nourishing, and enlivening interactions. We just don’t make good company… And this is when we insist on interacting with our partner and then wonder how come we get prickly, triggered, and sucked into a less than ideal exchange or even a full-blown fight.
To be a loving partner, and create a loving relationship, we first have to give ourselves love… To have a wonderful relationship, we have to clean up our routines and habits so we can properly show up to our relationship.
How about we slow down a bit and become a lot more intentional about how we take care of ourselves? This is where having more love in our life starts.
Watch the video to learn how to uplevel your relationship with food and step up your self-care!
PSS: Do you need support taking yourself, your relationship, and your life to the next level- actually living a healthy, happy, harmonious and overall abundant life?
Copyright (c) 2024 Emma K. Viglucci. All rights reserved.
Want to Use this Article in Your Own Website or Publication? Be our guest! Here is how, you MUST include: Emma K. Viglucci, LMFT is the Founder and Director of Metropolitan Marriage & Family Therapy, PLLC, a private practice that specializes in working with couples, she is the creator of the MetroRelationship™ philosophy and the Successful Couple Strategy™ that assist couples succeed at their relationship and their life. Stay Connected™ with Emma and receive weekly connection notes in your inbox with Personal Development and Relationship Enrichment insights and strategies, visit: www.metrorelationship.com.
Are you feeling inspired and motivated yet? Or, are you feeling out of sorts and kind of blue? Are you wanting to get better traction for the New Year? It recently heard that people use January as a breather from the hectic of the prior end-of-year… I’m wondering if this is true. I haven’t found this to be so, as an intentional tactic anyway… I think that most people mean to hit the New Year running but they immediately lose oomph, or they can’t get themselves into high gear.
This ends up affecting their wellbeing, productivity, joy and even connectedness with their partner and other loved ones… Life just isn’t satisfying… It is not fun to feel out of sorts, floundering, unmotivated, overwhelmed, lost and the like…
The key to any New Beginning, reset, or just plain and simple taking charge of our life to mold it into what we desire lies in how we choose to look at life itself… It has to do with how we view ourselves in our life, how we look at our context and situation, how we look at our partner, how we look at the world and everything else that is important to us…
Yes, getting esoteric and philosophical here for a moment – don’t worry, you know I always bring it down to takeaways, practical application, and assignments… I got you!
First, we have to take the bird’s eye view of our Human Experience… Asking ourselves questions as to:
~ What is the meaning of our life? ~ What is our purpose? ~ How does our relationship play into it? ~ How is our partner our Life Partner? ~ How does our connection support our Journey? ~ What kind of life do we want to live? ~ What kind of legacy do we want to leave behind…?
Not for the faint of heart. But without the big questions how do we even know what we want to create and how to go about it? Usually, not only do we not have the answer, or thought-out answers, to these questions, but we also don’t have our back in going about creating the experience we want…
As I mature and become wiser. As I practice what I preach. As I ongoingly seek to uplevel my experience while being deeply grateful and in awe of what it already is. As I learn more and do more research. As I connect with people smarter and more learned than me. I realize how beautiful and magnificent everyone is in our Human Experience.
And, I realize that most everything boils down to Love… Don’t roll your eyes, hang in there. You’ll like this, I promise…
Everything boils down to Love…
~ The way we are treated, is a reflection of how we treat ourselves… If we don’t love ourselves and treat ourselves well (including our ongoing self-talk in our head!), we won’t receive very good treatment… ~ When we don’t feel well it usually has to do with how we’ve neglected ourselves… ~ The happiest moments in our life can be narrowed down to moments of love and connection… ~ Everything we do is primarily out of love and for our loved ones at the end of the day. ~ When we think about what kind of life we would like to have lived, I’m sure very few people would say that they would prefer to have lived it alone.
Therefore, it behooves us to start off by upleveling how we love ourselves… How we do our Self-Love Practice, and how we choose to show up in the world – including how we show up to our relationship. We can choose to be the Best Partner because we are connected with ourself, resourced, and very much brimming with love, and we can create the most amazing relationship in turn…
It all starts with the decision to want to uplevel your relationship and your life…
Watch the video to learn how to start your New Beginning!
Wishing you all the joy, connection and love today and always…
PSS: Do you need support taking yourself, your relationship, and your life to the next level- actually living a healthy, happy, harmonious and overall abundant life?
Copyright (c) 2024 Emma K. Viglucci. All rights reserved.
Want to Use this Article in Your Own Website or Publication? Be our guest! Here is how, you MUST include: Emma K. Viglucci, LMFT is the Founder and Director of Metropolitan Marriage & Family Therapy, PLLC, a private practice that specializes in working with couples, she is the creator of the MetroRelationship™ philosophy and the Successful Couple Strategy™ that assist couples succeed at their relationship and their life. Stay Connected™ with Emma and receive weekly connection notes in your inbox with Personal Development and Relationship Enrichment insights and strategies, visit: www.metrorelationship.com.
As the Love Month is coming to an end, our attention is now to focus on carrying on with the love theme… As being kind, loving and romantic for one month out of the year just won’t cut it…
To create an amazing relationship, we must be amazing partners… It is common to get sidetracked with the business of life and to neglect, or lose focus on, our partner and our relationship. Let’s set ourselves up to change this as our relationship is the cornerstone of our life! Follow these 3 powerful steps to take your relationship to the next level.
Of course, I’m assuming you are interested in becoming your Best Self, in being the Best Partner, in creating your Best Relationship, and living your Best Life. If you are satisfied with everything as it is and don’t want to continue to evolve and see how awesome you can make things, then we are not your cup of tea- and that’s ok.
Our content and work are geared for partners and couples who are high achievers and performers and who want to take full advantage of what this life has to offer. They want to crack the codes and win at the game of life… They want to have a radiant and successful relationship…
If you are with us, take these 3 powerful steps to keep the love alive and keep enriching and nurturing your relationship. Let’s take your relationship to the next level…
The 3 Powerful Steps
We can only create the relationship and life we desire when we are intentional and proactive about it. An epic love affair with our partner, keeping the love and spark alive, and creating a meaningful life don’t happen by accident or by default…
The relationship and life we desire need to be designed and then created…
It’s funny to me when people ask, Should having a great relationship require work? The answer is a resounding, YES! But note that I don’t look at it as work though, you see… I look at anything relationship related as relationship enrichment, nurturing, tending, minding, creating and the like- and it’s lovely to do!
You wouldn’t go about building a house without designing it and having a blueprint first, would you? The following steps help with the design and the blueprint…
STEP 1 – The State of the Union…
In this step, the idea is to assess how your joint life and relationship are going. You’d first review the overall quality of your life and relationship, and then specific aspects of them.
You can assess the things that are important to you now. There are seasons in life and in our relationship. Different things are important to us at different times.
You might already have done a tremendous job improving, enriching, and enhancing the quality of your life and relationship so a higher-level assessment would be in order for you. You might already have a great relationship and life, but do you want to have an extraordinary one? How is your lifestyle, your legacy, your impact?
And, if you are struggling in your relationship and your life, you’ve come to the right place. You’d assess personal characteristics, mindset, skills, habits, self-management, resilience, and strategies both at the personal and relational level that affect how you go about creating your relationship and life…
You’d also assess your relationship mindset, communication and alignment, dynamics and patterns, connection and intimacy, collaboration and partnership…
What have you been working on and why?
STEP 2 – How Far You’ve Already Come…
It is common for us to lose sight of the Journey we’ve been on, how much we have already accomplished, how far we’ve already come personally and with our partner…
In this step the focus is on acknowledging all the hurdles, all the challenges, all the difficulties we’ve been through and how we’ve managed to survive them and possibly even thrive because of them…
Here we get to give ourselves and the partnership credit for everything we have already addressed, fixed, resolved, learned, implemented, improved, and everything else. We don’t live in a vacuum, and we don’t live static lives. You have been on a Journey, you are better for it, alone and together. Grab all the yummy stuff that’s already here…
If you are having a difficult time finding the progress, the achievements, the successes – focus on all the attempts, efforts, and things you’ve tried to help you improve your lot. You have done plenty, believe me. Just give yourself and your partner credit for what you’ve already done.
Your efforts might feel like they were in vain, but they were not. They are all a part of you and who you are Becoming… Nothing is a waste… Grab all the investment you’ve put into your relationship and your life already…
Celebrate that you’ve been living your Journey…
STEP 3 – On to What’s Next…
You might have really enjoyed Step1 and Step2 and are really looking forward to this final step. Or, the first 2 steps felt like a 2×2 upside the head. Either way, this step helps you take things to the next level…
Here we get dust off our relationship and life blueprint… If you have been with us for a while, you might have your Life Vision handy… This is your North Star, your guiding mechanism.
Your vision doesn’t have to be written in stone, it can be revised, updated, and even overhauled as you go. But at any given time, you need to be striving towards something… Otherwise you are creating by default- and we don’t want that!
If you don’t have a Vision, now is the time to dream yours up… Make it a stretch, make it fun, make it meaningful… Cover all life areas- what would your Best Life look and feel like? What do you want to create? What’s your Partner’s role, contribution, and impact? How do you Co-Create?
This is what you want to build… This is what you want to create with your partner- Relationship and Life…
Take note of where you’d like to be, and how you’d like to be… What specific things or areas need attention?
Now that you have where you’ve been, where you are, and where you want to go you are ready to take your relationship, and life, to the next level…
APPLICATION: Now that Love Month is over, is time to set up for more Loving throughout the year… Take your relationship to the next level with a plan for working out the kinks and continuing your nurturing…
Set time aside to explore the steps for yourself, process them in your Journal, make a list of specific things that stand out, highlight the things of note:
STEP 1 – The State of the Union…Review the status and state of your relationship and your life. The overall feel and the specific areas. Take note of these as well: Relationship mindset, communication and alignment, dynamics and patterns, connection and intimacy, collaboration and partnership… What is your current area of focus, and why?
STEP 2 – How Far You’ve Already Come…Review and capture all the ups and downs in your relationship and your life. Identify the patterns, the lessons learned and the things you accomplished, addressed, and resolved. Give yourself credit for all the effort invested. Give yourself, and your partner, compassion for the Journey you are on.
STEP 3 – On to What’s Next…Review your Life Vision, or create one…, to serve as your North Star for going forward. Filter everything in your relationship and life against this Vision as you go to help streamline, focus, stay in alignment, and on the right path…
IMPORTANT: Schedule time to meet with your partner to share and get on the same page. Give them a heads-up beforehand so they are not blindsided and so they can do this exercise themselves or at least have given it some thought.
Grab these for your takeaway: ~ Areas of focus to smooth out kinks in the relationship ~ Adding/continuing relationship nurturing activities ~ Corrective measures to your lifestyle and goals/projects to course correct and better align with your vision
When you are intentional about what you are creating, you’ll create what you desire…
Wishing you all the joy, connection and love today and always…
With Much Love & Light!
PS: Masterclasses
If you missed this month’s Masterclass, or any previous ones, you can still get them through our Member Center with a Lifestyle Membership! Enroll HERE
This month’s Masterclass Relationship Enrichment Mini Retreat- Connect More Deeply, Rekindle Your Love Keeping the love alive is not easy. Relationship slumps are common, but they don’t have to do you in. Come learn how to recharge your relationship and rekindle your love. Includes Recording and gorgeous Workbook of transformational processes
Copyright (c) 2022 Emma K. Viglucci. All rights reserved.
Want to Use this Article in Your Own Website or Publication?
Be our guest! Here is how, you MUST include: Emma K. Viglucci, LMFT is the Founder and Director of Metropolitan Marriage & Family Therapy, PLLC, a private practice that specializes in working with couples, she is the creator of the MetroRelationship™ philosophy and the Successful Couple Strategy™ that assist couples succeed at their relationship and their life. Stay Connected™ with Emma and receive weekly connection notes in your inbox with Personal Development and Relationship Enrichment insights and strategies, visit: www.metrorelationship.com
You know, it’s not enough to desire to have an amazing relationship. For us to have an amazing relationship, we have to want it and create it… This is where partners go wrong. They might just expect it to happen on its own.
They don’t necessarily know how to go about creating their extraordinary relationship. Or, they try but their attempts don’t pan out… Sometimes the relationship might feel like a dry sponge, it needs more than one drop of water for it to work well as a sponge… Embrace nurturing your relationship, use the 5 relationship boosting activities to get you going…
Note though, that any relationship strengthening, enrichment, and nurturing exercises and activities can’t happen in a vacuum. In and of themselves they won’t do much…
The key is to have a Relationship Enrichment Mindset™– to recognize the relationship as the cornerstone of our life, to decide to have a radiant and successful relationship, to choose to be the Best Partner, and to embrace relationship enrichment and nurturing as a lifestyle…
One such great addition to your lifestyle it to Date Your Partner… Aside from doing the Connection Habits, the Delighting Your Partner and other nurturing tactics, it is important to stay romantically engaged to keep the spark alive…
The 5 relationship boosting activities help bring the romance back…
Relationship Boosting Activities
You can add these to your repertoire of activities you integrate into your lifestyle to create your extraordinary relationship…
1 ~ Reminiscing – We have very short-term memories for the good stuff… We tend to forget all the good we’ve been through… During Couple Time, Date Night, special time set aside for this, or on the go, bring back memories of special moments, cute situations, fun experiences, anecdotes, pranks and anything else that sparks joy and connection and brings a smile to your faces.
2 ~ Complimenting – We are great at complaining and pointing out what we don’t like and what’s been done wrong… How about we flip that on its head and focus instead on acknowledging, appreciating, and pointing out all the good things. And, how about making it a point of praising and complimenting our partner daily going forward…
3 ~ Wishing – We are usually too focused on the daily grind to pick up our heads and think and plan for the future. Specially for the fun things… Couples get in a rut as this happens and it becomes harder to think of fun things to do, to plan them and to actually have fun doing them… Invite your partner to create a joint Fun Wish List and/or Bucket List of things to experience together. Enjoy the brainstorm and building the anticipation.
4 ~ Experiencing – It is not enough to live in the same home, raise our children, and go on vacation a couple of times a year. Relationships need meaningful, touching, and fun moments to become memorable and feel special. Partners need to feel each other, enjoy each other, and enjoy life together. Play with your bucket and wish lists to have great experiences and have great fun together, create amazing memories to cherish for a lifetime.
5 ~ Touching – Make it your business to touch your partner… This includes all kinds of touching- putting your hand on their shoulder, arm, or lower back, holding hands, kissing good morning and good night, cuddling, hugging, kissing, caressing, touching more intimately, making out and go from there…
Our relationship is what we make of it… Our relationship is what we make it…
Watch the video on the 5 Relationship Boosting Activities… Enjoy!
APPLICATION: Choose a Relationship Boosting Activity to play with and integrate into your life this coming week:
1 ~ Reminiscing – Set time aside to remember the good times 2 ~ Complimenting – Praise and compliment your partner on something daily 3 ~ Wishing – Create a Fun Wish List or Bucket List together 4 ~ Experiencing – Map out and schedule your fun experiences 5 ~ Touching – Experiment with different ways of touching your partner…
Creating an extraordinary relationship doesn’t have to be challenging. All that is required is the will and being intentional about it… You CAN create the relationship you desire… Keep the spark alive!
Wishing you all the joy, connection and love today and always…
With Much Love & Light!
PS: Masterclasses
❤️This month’s Masterclass Relationship Enrichment Mini Retreat- Connect More Deeply, Rekindle Your Love Keeping the love alive is not easy. Relationship slumps are common, but they don’t have to do you in. Come learn how to recharge your relationship and rekindle your love. Includes Recording and gorgeous Workbook of transformational processes Register HERE
❤️If you missed the embracing a Self-Love Practice Masterclass, you can still get it through our Member Center with a Lifestyle Membership! A Self-Love Strategy for Creating Your Best Life- Stop Self-Sabotage, Increase Resilience, and Generate More Joy Includes Recording and gorgeous Workbook of transformational processes Enroll HERE
Copyright (c) 2022 Emma K. Viglucci. All rights reserved.
Want to Use this Article in Your Own Website or Publication?
Be our guest! Here is how, you MUST include: Emma K. Viglucci, LMFT is the Founder and Director of Metropolitan Marriage & Family Therapy, PLLC, a private practice that specializes in working with couples, she is the creator of the MetroRelationship™ philosophy and the Successful Couple Strategy™ that assist couples succeed at their relationship and their life. Stay Connected™ with Emma and receive weekly connection notes in your inbox with Personal Development and Relationship Enrichment insights and strategies, visit: www.metrorelationship.com
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Emma K. Viglucci, LMFT has been in the mental health profession in varying capacities for the past 20+ years. She is the Founder and Director of metrorelationship.com a psychotherapy and coaching practice specializing in working with busy professional and entrepreneurial couples who are struggling getting on the same page and feeling connected. The work helps couples create a radiant and successful relationship and meaningful life by becoming a strong partnership and increasing their connection, intimacy, and fun. Emma is the creator of the MetroRelationship™ philosophy and the Successful Relationship Strategy™.
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