Some people love managing their money, others dread it. And this is usually the case for couples… One partner is great at doing the accounting and managing the finances, while the other prefers to bury their head in the sand. Sound familiar? There are a lot of reasons for why this happens ranging from subconscious programming around worthiness and deservingness to finding numbers, spreadsheets, and related details just too tedious. The thing is, regardless of our preference, finances still need to be managed and they need to be managed collaboratively if we are in a relationship.
Money is a very important aspect of our adult life that provides security and awesomeness for us now and in our future… And it is up to us to find a way to make the best out of our money management in our relationship.
The key is to have awareness into our own relationship with money and money programming that might affect its management, and to have insight and knowledge into our partner’s as well.
The partners should know about each other’s financial histories, money management styles and strengths, and overall relationship with money. This is especially important information if your relationship is fairly new, and you are increasing levels of commitment…
Full transparency and accountability are a must for the couple’s healthy financial life. Regardless of what financial plans and systems they put in place, the key is to device these respectfully, collaboratively, and intentionally to ensure a secure financial future.
The partners might have different expectations, wishes, preferences, and desires about their finances and their future. But as with anything else in the relationship, this has to do with getting on the same page and working together to achieve shared goals.
When money impasses are encountered, please know this is usually not about the money itself. This has to do with your personal programming and your relationship dynamics. To move forward, focus on addressing the underlying patterns and don’t get stuck on the details of the situation and the circumstances. And mind the meaning you are assigning to what’s happening!
This is why Christine Luken, our Podcast Guest in our latest episode, shares that money is emotional. She offers wonderful insights on how to manage money in your relationship. Check out its video below!
PSS: Do you need support taking yourself, your relationship, and your life to the next level- actually living a healthy, happy, harmonious and overall abundant life?
Copyright (c) 2023 Emma K. Viglucci. All rights reserved.
Want to Use this Article in Your Own Website or Publication? Be our guest! Here is how, you MUST include: Emma K. Viglucci, LMFT is the Founder and Director of Metropolitan Marriage & Family Therapy, PLLC, a private practice that specializes in working with couples, she is the creator of the MetroRelationship™ philosophy and the Successful Couple Strategy™ that assist couples succeed at their relationship and their life. Stay Connected™ with Emma and receive weekly connection notes in your inbox with Personal Development and Relationship Enrichment insights and strategies, visit: www.metrorelationship.com.
Being thankful and grateful are qualities, strengths, and states that go beyond the month of November and Thanksgiving (the US holiday). These make a difference in the experience of our life. People tend to look outside themselves and to external factors to feel good and have a happy life. They believe that happiness is dependent on their circumstances… But time and again researchers, scholars and thought-leaders have shared that happiness is an internal state and a choice. One that can be cultivated and nurtured…
Happiness, life satisfaction, and longevity are all impacted by gratitude, connection, and purpose… These are the ingredients for creating our long, healthy, and happy life… A good life. Our Best Life.
~ Purpose is simply pursuing what is meaningful to us, that keeps us engaged and having a zest for life… We are always in-charge of our own internal world assigning meaning to everything in our external one… We have a choice as to what meaning we assign things and how we choose to look at everything, and what we choose to pursue. As exemplified by the work of Viktor Frankl, a psychiatrist that developed his theory while a concentration camp prisoner during WWII in his book Man’s Search for Meaning.
~ Connection to loved ones give us security and a sense of belonging… It gives our life further meaning and purpose… This is what keeps us going and what we live for… Robert Waldinger explains this in his TED Talk about what makes a good life describing the longest study on happiness.
~ A Gratitude Practice makes a big difference inour overall Happiness– Shawn Achor lists the key ingredients of this practice in his talks. This is what I’m calling embracing a #GratitudeAttitude. Which is looking for the good in things, focusing on the positives, seeing the blessings, appreciating the beauty in others and so on, adding dimension to our experience. It puts us in a different frame of mind. It raises our vibration. It transcends the minutiae and the mundane…
How about we take the pursuit of happiness seriously… And, by this I mean we take it easy in our approach to life and focus on the things that are actually important to creating the life we desire… Pursuing what gives us meaning including creating a successful relationship with our partner and minding our internal world including developing a #gratitudeattitude…
Let’s take being grateful to new heights by increasing our appreciations, acknowledgements and thanks-giving this month and going forward…
PSS: Do you need support taking yourself, your relationship, and your life to the next level- actually living a healthy, happy, harmonious and overall abundant life?
Copyright (c) 2023 Emma K. Viglucci. All rights reserved.
Want to Use this Article in Your Own Website or Publication? Be our guest! Here is how, you MUST include: Emma K. Viglucci, LMFT is the Founder and Director of Metropolitan Marriage & Family Therapy, PLLC, a private practice that specializes in working with couples, she is the creator of the MetroRelationship™ philosophy and the Successful Couple Strategy™ that assist couples succeed at their relationship and their life. Stay Connected™ with Emma and receive weekly connection notes in your inbox with Personal Development and Relationship Enrichment insights and strategies, visit: www.metrorelationship.com.
Thanksgiving is about really appreciating everything in our lives… A grateful heart is like a magic pill… There are so many ways to embrace a Gratitude Practice and being Thankful. When we appreciate our life in its full glory, the challenges and all- as they are for us, then we are abundant…
From an abundant place we can genuinely be generous to enrich the life of others, and in turn our own. Today, let’s focus on Expanding Generosity (Thanksgiving Series Pt3).
No matter how we cut it, there is always someone who has less than us or has it worse than us… And helping alleviate their suffering or making their lives better in some way not only does it help them, but it also helps us…
Being generous is a lovely character strength that add to who we are… It helps us have a fuller human experience. It enriches our lives. And it helps us make the world a better place in the process…
Generosity is a Win-Win affair.
Cultivating being generous is super fun and super rewarding.
Learn 3 unique ways of Expanding Generosity…
Watch the video to learn three unique ways of Expanding Generosity and rock the Season of Giving…
APPLICATION: When we expand how we show our generosity is permeates the fabric of our life. Our generous nature shines through touching other’s hearts and in turn making us feel good.
I – Identify the area where you haven’t been as generous as you’d like: With yourself, with your loved ones, with others at large…
II – Make a commitment to become more generous in that area
III – Embrace Expanding Generosity with GUSTO:
Yourself – It’s easy for us to run ourselves into the ground and forget our basic needs if we are not careful… Recalibrate your calendar (Time Map) so you create a gentler approach to your days… Build in: Buffer Time, Transition Time, Me Time. And use these times as designated… Don’t allow them to get sucked up by other demands…
✔️Make sure you milk Me Time! Add what nurturing activity you’ll do for yourself during that time…
Your Loved Ones – Some tend to be nicer to strangers… How about we are more generous with those we love? Be very intentional about the language you use and use kind and gentler words as much as possible. Make a list of nicer words you’ll use, nurturing gestures you’ll sprinkle into your days, and different ways and times you’ll give more affection…
✔️Make sure you get creative with your words, gestures, and affections- delight your loveys!
Others at Large – When we think of giving, we usually thing of contributions and donations. Which, of course, are absolutely fine and if that’s what you do please continue to do so.
But being generous with others goes beyond specific “giving”, it has to do with showing up with a generous heart the rest of the time as much as possible. How about giving more generous tips, more compliments, and being present with your eye contact and attention?
✔️Make sure you take this on to a degree that the receiving person takes note of the generosity!
Notice how good it feels to be generous and kind to yourself and others…
Generosity is not just about giving money or donations to charities or special causes. Generosity starts with having an open and kind hear with ourselves and those around us…
Expand Generosity with gusto!
Wishing you much joy, connection and love today and always…
With Much Love & Light!
PS –Check out past Holidays posts to help you Start Your Season Right!
Copyright (c) 2021 Emma K. Viglucci. All rights reserved.
Want to Use this Article in Your Own Website or Publication?
Be our guest! Here is how, you MUST include: Emma K. Viglucci, LMFT is the Founder and Director of Metropolitan Marriage & Family Therapy, PLLC, a private practice that specializes in working with couples, she is the creator of the MetroRelationship™ philosophy and the Successful Couple Strategy™ that assist couples succeed at their relationship and their life. Stay Connected™ with Emma and receive weekly connection notes in your inbox with Personal Development and Relationship Enrichment insights and strategies, visit: www.metrorelationship.com
Did you know that the better you feel, the easier and more joyful your life becomes? Whether you look at this in terms of having high vibrations and attracting other high vibration experiences in your life.
Or, if you look at this as when you feel well, you have more energy, you have more patience, you have more bandwidth and such to apply to your life. Or just as, feeling well is all that matters. The important point is that we want to feel well, happy. The better we feel, the better. Here is to feeling better by Embracing Gratitude (Thanksgiving Series Pt2).
There are a multitude of ways to make ourselves feel better, but what better way this Season than with: Grace, Gratitude, and Generosity…
Not only are these amazing character strengths to embrace and rejoice with during the Holidays Season, but they are great character strengths to develop and embrace all year around. These are great characteristics to cultivate through our personal development work for increased wellbeing…
Today in Part2, we’ll focus on Embracing Gratitude. 🙏
Embracing Gratitude is a wonderful antidote for dispelling fear, anxiety, anger and the like. Our brain can’t be in a triggered state and in a gratitude state at the same time…
This is one of the reasons we start all our sessions with Appreciations. Where the partners get to share what they appreciate about the other and what the other has done or how they’ve been since the prior session.
Focusing on the yummy stuff also invites more yummy stuff. It reinforces that what the other is doing or how they are showing up is appreciated, which serves as a reward and incentive…
It sets a different tone to the session. There is a shift to a pro relationship mindset…
It curves the negativity bias and helps reprogram it…
And, other goodies…
All these benefits are just within the context of a therapy session, and within its first few minutes. Imagine what an impact appreciation and gratitude can have in your life as an ongoing practice…
For now, let’s Embrace Gratitude for the next few weeks by expanding your Gratitude Practice, and reap 3 coveted benefits in the process….
Watch the video to learn how to expand your Gratitude Practice and about the benefits you get as a result…
APPLICATION: The feeling of Gratitude is one of those super feelings that is easy to generate and has a wonderful impact on our wellbeing, our life, and the world at large… Embracing Gratitude with a Gratitude Practice built into our lifestyle is key to really integrate this potent elixir into our life.
Select one or more tactics below to really play with in the coming weeks:
Appreciation Habit – We tend to have negativity bias in how we view everything, especially our partner and our relationship… This is the worst thing to allow to flourish in your relationship if you are interested in creating a Radiant and Successful Relationship…
✨ Create a time in your daily routine where you get to spend a few minutes with your partner sharing appreciations about each other and acknowledging their investment in making your relationship, home and life more awesome.
Thankfulness Lens – First thing upon waking put on a Thankfulness Lens:
✨ Set the intention to notice the beauty in your life and world, see the positive and opportunities in situations, recognize the good intention behind your partner’s actions
✨ Be thankful for all these treasures
Honoring Differences – We live in a world where homogeneousness is valued, or rather where differences are not really tolerated… How about deciding not to contribute to polarizing views, believes, perspectives, actions and general approach to life?
✨ Notice where you are intolerant, prejudice, inflexible, judgmental and the like and decide now to widen your views and approach.
✨ Choose 3 behaviors you can integrate into your life to loosen the usual limiting grip and Transmute this wasted energy. This applies to political views, friendships, in-laws, children, and most importantly your partner… For example, stop begrudging your partner their wish for more separateness… Build-in more personal time into your lifestyle.
Embracing Gratitude is a wonderful sentiment to add to our Holidays Season and merriment. Additionally, being Grateful is a potent character strength that when harnessed within a Gratitude Practice it becomes a powerful tool for creating an amazing relationship and gorgeous life…
This one is a keeper!
Wishing you much joy, connection and love today and always…
With Much Love & Light!
PS –Check out past Holidays posts to help you Start Your Season Right!
Copyright (c) 2021 Emma K. Viglucci. All rights reserved.
Want to Use this Article in Your Own Website or Publication?
Be our guest! Here is how, you MUST include: Emma K. Viglucci, LMFT is the Founder and Director of Metropolitan Marriage & Family Therapy, PLLC, a private practice that specializes in working with couples, she is the creator of the MetroRelationship™ philosophy and the Successful Couple Strategy™ that assist couples succeed at their relationship and their life. Stay Connected™ with Emma and receive weekly connection notes in your inbox with Personal Development and Relationship Enrichment insights and strategies, visit: www.metrorelationship.com
Whoa, it’s that time of year again! As we start November, we are entering the Holidays Season and with them the inevitability of being stretched thin, overwhelmed, and stressed out. Unless of course, we are intentional and proactive about having a Zen Holidays and year-end… To help us cultivate our Zen this month, I’ll be doing a 3-part series covering Grace, Gratitude, and Generosity. Let’s start with: Giving Grace (Thanksgiving Series Pt1).
First off, why Grace, Gratitude and Generosity? Because I wanted to write on the theme of Thanksgiving and those three characteristics capture the essence of this holiday so nicely. Plus, they are a pretty set of Gs. 🤓 LOL
All kidding aside, these characteristics came to me for myself as I’m getting ready for my Holidays Season. I’ve been setting intentions and being proactive about my holidays for years now, and every year I’m inspired to add more simplicity, beauty, and Zen. My goal is to really be present and enjoy the simple pleasures bestowed by the magic of the season. ✨
🌟 Being easy about things 🌟 Letting go of perfectionism, annoyances, control and the like 🌟 Creating space for authenticity
We can give grace in all areas of our life – from how we treat ourselves, to how we operate in our business, to how we relate to our partner…
Learn how to apply this to your relationship!
Watch the video to learn how to give more grace in your relationship and how it helps create a major shift!
APPLICATION: Identify an area in your relationship where you experience a lot of frustration and pain. Then apply the 3-part lens to deconstruct your experience and embrace Giving Grace instead…
🌟Being easy about things – What do you wish in that area? What are your expectations? How do you communicate them? How do you go about making things happen or getting what you want?
🌟Letting go of perfectionism, annoyances, control – How do you look at what happens in that area? Where are you aiming for perfection? What do you let annoy you? How do you impose your way?
🌟Creating space for authenticity – How do you hold back, squash, your true essence? How do you silence yourself? How do you make yourself small? How do you so the same to your partner?
Now look at your answers and adjust the unrealistic expectations, rigidity, poor boundaries and mindset.
Revise your answers as to how you really want to be and show up…
When we embrace Giving Grace in the experience of our relationship and in our interactions with our partner, we soon notice that the relationship flows more smoothly, that there is less resistance from our partner, and that we feel more on the same page and connected.
Make Giving Grace a Holiday Intention™ this year!
Wishing you much joy, connection and love today and always…
Copyright (c) 2021 Emma K. Viglucci. All rights reserved.
Want to Use this Article in Your Own Website or Publication?
Be our guest! Here is how, you MUST include: Emma K. Viglucci, LMFT is the Founder and Director of Metropolitan Marriage & Family Therapy, PLLC, a private practice that specializes in working with couples, she is the creator of the MetroRelationship™ philosophy and the Successful Couple Strategy™ that assist couples succeed at their relationship and their life. Stay Connected™ with Emma and receive weekly connection notes in your inbox with Personal Development and Relationship Enrichment insights and strategies, visit: www.metrorelationship.com
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Emma K. Viglucci, LMFT has been in the mental health profession in varying capacities for the past 20+ years. She is the Founder and Director of metrorelationship.com a psychotherapy and coaching practice specializing in working with busy professional and entrepreneurial couples who are struggling getting on the same page and feeling connected. The work helps couples create a radiant and successful relationship and meaningful life by becoming a strong partnership and increasing their connection, intimacy, and fun. Emma is the creator of the MetroRelationship™ philosophy and the Successful Relationship Strategy™.
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