Do you feel like life is a struggle? Are you having a hard time in your relationship? Do you find that you can’t seem to get along with your partner? That no matter how hard you try, you just can’t seem to get on the same page?
That you can’t create and sustain connection? That you can’t make headways in creating the life you want? Do you feel stagnant, stuck, hopeless? If so, you are not alone. Unfortunately, wanting to fix your relationship is a common desire. Things might not be working right now, but they can…
You want to have an amazing life but even thinking of pursuing a Life Vision feels foreign and overwhelming. You have no clue as to where to start. And thinking about living your best life feels ridiculous when your life is a struggle every day.
When you are constantly at odds with your partner. How can you possibly think of a dream life, a dream future? You don’t even know what would be in it- it is so far removed. And if you had an inkling it really just lives in dream land…
You can’t even consider going for it as you are in mostly survival mode. Yes, you have some good days and some fun times, but in all you are just grinding and surviving. You are not alive. You are not living your best life.
You are not on the same page, feeling deeply connected and having a flowing collaboration with your partner. You are not creating your joint Life Vision every day. The concept of manifesting it together is extraterrestrial talk.
When you pause to think about your life and your relationship, it feels like life is passing you by. It feels like you are incompatible with your partner- that they don’t get you and that you don’t care to get their ridiculousness.
You deeply want to fix your relationship because every conversation and interaction ends up in a disagreement, escalation, or at minimum both feel really bad- not heard, understood, gotten, valued or cherished. You keep triggering and annoying each other, you are constantly walking on eggshells, and are running on empty.
You can count on one hand how many times you were intimate in the past couple of months or had real fun together. So then, how can you possibly have bandwidth and energy for collaborating on a joint Life Vision…
I get it – even considering a joint Life Vision is the furthest thing from your mind…
What if I told you that you can come back from this disillusioned grim place? And that the way is actually quite simple, not easy but simple?
Fixing Your Relationship
The reason it’s not easy is because we love to blame our partner for what’s wrong. We focus on who they are, how they are, what they do, and not do, and so on. This is really an epidemic. When the couples we work with are stuck, it is partially because they refuse to not focus on their partner and how they supposedly ruin things…
You see focusing on your partner and how they should change- how they should stop lying, or start apologizing, or stop yelling, or start being nice, or stop being compulsive, or start being more compassionate, and so on- is not the answer.
We can’t make people do anything, we are not inside their brain and body to make them do the things we want. We can’t demand respect, understanding and niceness. This is not how we create our radiant and successful relationship…
But what I can tell you with certainty, is that you do have control over yourself and what you do… And, that when you do something different or show up differently that your partner automatically responds in kind… A different approach invites, inspires, a different response…
This is how you create change- this is how you help your partner change… This is how you create a different relationship that is the cornerstone of creating your best life. From this place you can envision and create your joint Life Vision… Voila!
Hey, I know that this is super hard to do for different reasons. It is especially hard to make our own changes and to show up differently, when our partner is doing what they do that so hurt or annoy us… But if you want to create your best life, it needs to start with you!
You can’t keep waiting for your partner to change or to do something different. You can be waiting a very long time, and that is if you even make is as a couple… You have the power, all the power, to change your relationship for you have control over what you do and what you do creates change…
It’s up to you. Do you want this relationship to work? Do you want to create an epic love affair with your partner? Do you want to create your best life? Do you want to strive for your Life Vison jointly? Well, let’s go- you can do it!
APPLICATION: How can you possibly change your relationship by yourself? The key is in fully owning all of you and showing up with your best self, as much as you can, as often as you can…
When you do this, your awesomeness will inspire your partner (and others!) to show up better themselves– and so in actuality you are both working it at the end of the day…
But when you wait for your partner as supposed to inspiring your partner, that’s when things move super slow and they are more painful than they have to be…
So, where do you start? Start as simply as possible and that is by having awareness of your self- your triggers, your sensitivities, your scripts, your stories, your wounds, your defenses, your shadows, how you show up and what you put out, your patterns, what you love, what you desire, what gives you joy, what’s fun and exciting for you, etc. Become more aware of you and learn yourself better!
How? Start with simple mindfulness practices, journaling, being with yourself, staying open and receptive… Strengthen yourself from within…
If you are at a loss for how to do this and stay the course for better taking care of and learning yourself, and how to inspire your partner- we can help.
Take one action today to get you moving on your new track: Get a meditation app, get a new journal, schedule a Self Date, schedule an appointment with a couples therapist or other professional support, anything towards investing in yourself… Have fun!
You can do it! You can fix your relationship! Become your most radiant self and invite your partner to shine with you…
Wishing you all the joy, connection and love today and always…
With Much Love & Light!
Copyright (c) 2022 Emma K. Viglucci. All rights reserved.
Want to Use this Article in Your Own Website or Publication? Be our guest! Here is how, you MUST include: Emma K. Viglucci, LMFT is the Founder and Director of Metropolitan Marriage & Family Therapy, PLLC, a private practice that specializes in working with couples, she is the creator of the MetroRelationship™ philosophy and the Successful Couple Strategy™ that assist couples succeed at their relationship and their life. Stay Connected™ with Emma and receive weekly connection notes in your inbox with Personal Development and Relationship Enrichment insights and strategies, visit: www.metrorelationship.com.
Unfortunately, the feeling of being stuck and feeling hopeless in one’s relationship is not uncommon. Many partner’s feel they are not compatible, they don’t enjoy each other’s company, and can’t see a future together… A sad state of affairs.
Partners get to this point because they get entrenched in their own perspective losing sight of the other and the relationship, and the gorgeous potential… Once this is recaptured, they get along, get on the same page and get things done… They move forward creating their successful and radiant relationship!
Are you feeling stuck? You don’t have to be!
Here are 3 Tactics to help you start moving forward:
Learn to get along
Getting along doesn’t mean agreeing on everything or denying and swallowing your preference and desires. Getting along means understanding what you each want, why and finding a way of honoring both sides…
Couples usually get this all wrong. Partners dig in their heals on their side and look at their partner as the enemy for not giving up their own preference for them. They become extremely egocentric. Everything that is going on is filtered through the lens of did they got what they wanted. And if they didn’t, they compute a notch against their partner. Yuck!
This is definitely not a relationship enrichment approach, nor an emotionally safe approach of being in relationship. This cuts at the bond between the partners, disrupts their attachment. This breaches boundaries and undermines the other. This erodes self-esteem and confidence. This creates doubt and stuckness in the relationship.
We can be very good at making a federal case against our partner. We can be very good at connecting all the dots to prove ourselves right, for making the case of how we’ve been wronged in some way. We can be very good at presenting the logic behind how our partner let us down, again.
But, when we approach our relationship this way, we are just cheating ourselves out of the synergy and the gift inherent in our relationship… Gone are the days of finding a partner for contractual reasons. Now we choose each other and there is meaning in our choice. We forget to honor and benefit from that…
Getting along has to do with understanding each other, getting our partner and validating what’s true for them (showing them we get them), having their back, having their best interest at heart, approaching them from our heart and not our head (ego). It has to do with honoring that we are different people and working at figuring out how to make our differences work for us instead of against us…
So, for starters – stop looking at yourself as the victim in your relationship. Stop looking at your partner as the villain, the enemy, the bad guy. Stop looking at the relationship as dissatisfying and hopeless.
Instead take a step back and see the gift that is your partner and relationship. See how your partner does contribute, has your back, is committed… See the intentions, attempts, and willingness. However small these might be at this juncture… Remember, your partner is hanging in there as well…
Look at your partner with your heart and with compassion, not with your head and with criticism… See them, see their essence. Look beyond the noise, defenses, and imperfections… Once you shifted, then approach them…
Get on the same page
Being on the same page does not mean agreeing on a topic or situation, looking at an issue the same way, loving your partner’s perspective or approach and the like.
It does mean understanding where you are each coming from, what is significant about their experiences and why, how that fits with who the individuals are and what is going on for them, what’s the purpose and motive behind their actions, what are just defenses and not ill intentioned behaviors, what are attempts at pleasing and connection but just with poor delivery…
Getting a clear understanding of what is happening by giving the partner the benefit of the doubt, some grace, and compassion helps break impasses… Partners get stuck because they refuse to see the other side. They get stuck by trying to be right by making the other wrong… They get stuck because their perspective becomes very cloudy with their own position, circumstance and wishes.
Getting on the same page means finding a common ground, happy medium, or way of agreeing to move forward… It’s ok for your partner to get their way on what is really important to them. It’s ok for you to get your way on what is really important to you. When there is a mutual topic that is really important to both, know that there are usually degrees of how important something is to someone and hardly ever do people feel exactly the same way… Therefore, the discrepancy can be used to break impasses…
Now, don’t be stubborn and find this to be the thing you both agree on 100%! If you find that you are doing this, you are still very much entrenched in your own side… Then, this a YOU problem, not a partner problem… Remember the 80/20 rule. That any situation that is troubling you, is 80% about you, and 20% about what your partner is doing or now doing… Giving your 80% attention should keep you busy enough to have any desire to focus on your partner’s 20…
Getting on the same page is YOUR inside job. It’s is not your partner’s job. Now, if your partner were reading this, the same applies to them… So you see, you both work on your own in-sides…
Please bear in mind that you each have your own style, pace and ability for working on your side. If you are focusing on how much your partner is doing or not doing, how they are doing it, and how fast – again, you are focusing on the wrong side…
Focus on you and you’ll see how fast things actually change! For when we show up differently, we invite (co-create) different stuff…
So for starters – invite your partner into a conversation where the focus in on how you get their side… How you get them, get their point of view, perspective or experience, understand what is happening for them and what they desire and why, etc.
Seriously, keep this ONLY about them… Once your partner feels gotten, they un-dig their heals… Stop the conversation while you are ahead, don’t turn it back to you or try to address any issues at this time. Select another time to come back to the rest… In the meantime, watch the different energy and dynamics that come from your investment…
Get things done
You’ll notice that once you start shifting and showing up differently, agreeing on courses of action and staying synchronized becomes much easier!
A mistake that partners make is trying to control what their partner does, how they do it and when they do it – micromanaging so it gets done on their timetable. Who wants to live like this? Not for nothing the partner is shutting down, not showing up, disappearing or doing a crappy job…
When we control and micromanage, we ensure that the other doesn’t show up with their genius and internal resources. We end up creating a self-fulling prophecy that the other is not there, we are alone and unsupported, and we have to take care of everything… Right? We are just validating our scripts and repeating our patterns…
Now, you might be saying – Yeah, but when I put my partner in charge of such and such, or remove myself from something, or let this go or that go, they are still dropping the ball…
To that I say that the “delegation”, collaboration, wasn’t set up properly… You dumped the task on your partner without buy-in, guidelines, and the like. You gave up a task and your partner has no idea that it’s theirs now. You claim something is no longer a task, but still want the results of having a related task completed. And, a host of other funny business that sets you up to not be properly and genuinely supported…
If you are not getting what you want, what do you need to do differently to get it…? We have no control over what other people do, including our partner. But we do have control over what we do, how we show up and how we set things up…
So for starters – review the things you are not getting enough support on, that are getting on your nerves, that your partner keeps f*g up, and the like… Make a list of all the annoyances, of all the supposed dropped balls…
Now, take a look at how those balls were put into circulation… Hey, you might think you both have done an amazing job at setting up who owns this ball. And, yet it is still dropped. To that I say that it wasn’t really set up amazingly… Dig into why the ball is dropped. The best of intentions could have been in place to pick up this ball, but maybe the picking up wasn’t set up realistically…
You can go two ways here, find the theme of what is happening or identify the ball that is aggravating you the most. Then address this with your partner.
Now, don’t go in with guns blazing… Go into the conversation shifted, getting their side, and addressing it from what’s happening for you around this ball. Don’t go into the conversation by noting how your partner sucks and how they failed you, again…
ASSIGNMENT: Take note which of these three areas is most wobbly for you:
Get along – mindset
Get on the same page – communication
Get things done – collaboration
Then, give that area all your attention. Don’t dabble, be serious about making a change!
When you embrace taking ownership of how you do you in your relationship, you’ll be amazed at how quickly and beautifully you start seeing the changes you want.
Tackling the tactics above helps you make some head way in the implementing 3 of 5 key Elements in the Successful Couple Strategy™: Context/Mindset (1), Communication/Alignment (2), and Collaboration/Partnership (5). Woot!
Start creating changes within you so you can see changes in your relationship!
Copyright (c) 2020 Emma K. Viglucci. All rights reserved.
Want to Use this Article in Your Own Website or Publication?
Be our guest! Here is how, you MUST include: Emma K. Viglucci, LMFT is the Founder and Director of Metropolitan Marriage & Family Therapy, PLLC, a private practice that specializes in working with couples, she is the creator of the MetroRelationship™ philosophy and the Successful Couple Strategy™ that assist couples succeed at their relationship and their life. Stay Connected™ with Emma and receive weekly connection notes in your inbox with Personal Development and Relationship Enrichment insights and strategies, visit: www.metrorelationship.com
I’m operating with a new mantra, Keep clearing. Doing another round of letting go of the old (like possessions, processes, ways of thinking…), and I’m seriously embracing the concept of entering a New Era… Feeling amazing… Yay! How are you doing?
If we want change to happen, we have to change how we do things… We have to change how we look at things… We have to change how we are showing up, how we are choosing to Be. We have to be different to create a new reality… Change doesn’t just happen. And, especially it doesn’t happen by doing more of the same with stronger conviction… We just dig ourselves more and more into our status quo with that approach…
Our best thinking got us this far. But the mindset, capabilities, and tactics that got us here became outdated. It’s time to level-up if we are to create our best year yet, our best relationship yet, our best life yet. It’s time to clear the old if we are to have space for the new… It’s time to truly embrace our potential, our desires, our calling, our purpose, our mission. It’s time to step-it up if we are to play a bigger game.
Now, please do not let your Ego tell you, I’m good, I don’t need a bigger game… This is just your fear talking! Stop fooling yourself that you want a simple life. Now, don’t get me wrong, there is simple and there is Simple. I’m talking about going for the simple that implies mediocracy… Stop settling!
I’ll take simple vs complex as much as my current brain will allow me. Still working on cracking that code, on letting go of making things complicated… LOL But, I’m saying let’s go for an elegantly simply efficient and productive Grand Life…
We usually can’t snap our finger and switch gears. If it was that simple everyone would be living their Grand Life already… It requires owning our why, owning our values, owning our desires, owning our current level of investment into our values, owning our current level of functioning, and fully owning our current status in all areas of our life… It requires complete ownership, a truthful reality check, and full commitment to create our Grand Life…
Hey, you can choose to have your simple mediocre life. That’s always your prerogative, but then maybe I’m not the lid for your pot. And, that’s OK. I’m here to serve those that want to live their life to their full potential, who want to go for it. I’m here to serve those who want to save their marriage, their relationship. Who want to have an amazing relationship with their Partner.
I’m here to serve those that are not afraid to weather the tough times. Who are willing to do what it takes to stay in the game. Who are willing to look at how they contribute to their status quo, and to change how they do their side. Who are willing to stretch out of their comfort zone.
Who are willing to be uncomfortable as they stretch. Who make being uncomfortable their new norm, for as you keep evolving and creating awesomeness you’ll always be stretching and hence uncomfortable a lot…
Do you get that going for your Grand Life requires you fully show up to your life? Really show up… Are you willing to step up your game? Are you willing to be uncomfortable? If not now when…? Don’t wait for the perfect time to start working on things… In all reality, all it takes is a decision… Decide now you are no longer settling. Decide now to go full on for your Grand Life…
If you are struggling in your relationship or simply are going for its next best version, here is a wonderful relationship investment to do this Valentine’s Season:
Love Launch™
During the 4 Weekends leading to Valentine’s Day (or another occasion, or just because!), you are to make a real concerted investment at nurturing your relationship. Do it with gusto and to please your Partner. Put on the “dating lens” – remember you’d do anything for your partner once upon a time…? Go all out to make an impression. And, YOU enjoy the process as you go…
Include this 14 Day Love Challenge! Start on February 1st, or at any time you want to Jump-Start, Spring-to-Life, or Reset your relationship. Simple, yet powerful, Daily Relationship Nurturing Nuggets. Treat your partner right!
Kudos on subscribing to this Newsletter. Kudos on reading this Issue. Kudos on staying open to bringing your relationship and your life to the next level. Now, let’s do it!
ASSIGNMENT: If you are still on the sidelines, a passive bystander, know that you are just killing time and wasting your life. Why postpone your transformation, your results, having your Grand Life? It just doesn’t make sense! Please, PLEASE, make a commitment to get in the game, I’d hate to leave you behind.
You know that when we really want something, we get it… You know that you have made things happen before when you wanted to… Just decide you are going for it, really going for it not dabbling in it… It makes a MASSIVE difference…
Take a look at the Valentine’s Day Love Launch™ and Love Challenge™ and commit to playing full out – embrace the protocols and work it baby!
Make the commitment to invest in your Love Life… Here is to an amazing Love Season!
Can’t wait to delight you with our next goodie to help you properly invest in your relationship! Stay tuned for details!
Complete the Assignment, and share your takeaway, insights, and results with a note in the Comments box at the end! I’d love to hear how you are using this content.
Happy Investing!
Copyright (c) 2020 Emma K. Viglucci. All rights reserved.
Want to Use this Article in Your Own Website or Publication?
Be our guest! Here is how, you MUST include: Emma K. Viglucci, LMFT is the Founder and Director of Metropolitan Marriage & Family Therapy, PLLC, a private practice that specializes in working with couples, she is the creator of the MetroRelationship™ philosophy and a variety of Successful Couple™ content that assist couples succeed at their relationship and their life. Stay Connected™ with Emma and receive weekly Connection Notes in your inbox with Personal Growth and Relationship Enrichment insights and strategies, visit: www.metrorelationship.com.
How are you doing? Hope you are keeping the momentum from the New Year going… As I’m sure you already know, right about now people start floundering with their New Year Resolutions, Intentions and the like… Tomorrow is the 3rd Monday of the New Year and known as Blue Monday…
The end-of-year drive, the holidays merriment and the new year’s excitement all but come crashing down… This is when back to reality hits us like a ton of bricks.
This is when we realize we are not exactly where we want to be, and the New Year’s promises are quickly fading away. This is when we realize real change needs to happen and we don’t necessarily know how to make it happen. We might know what we want to change, we might even know how, but somehow, we can’t get traction…
This is when it becomes obvious that we can’t make changes with just pure willpower and desire… This is when things become bleak and we feel powerless and stuck. If you are rocking the New Year, Congratulations! Just beware that this can still hit you with a delayed impact if you are not proactively preventative…
It is challenging to get traction on the changes we want because unfortunately our brain is working against us – it doesn’t like change. We literally have brain structures to maintain homoeostasis… To keep things in the status quo. We also have our Ego protecting us from growth and change. It perceives these as a threat…
Change in our life is to the brain and ego like viruses are to our body. The defenses come out to attack any intrusion. Hence, we end up sabotaging our very efforts, wishes and desires…
The 3 main areas people usually want changes on are health, relationship and finances. If they use their genius, they might have set goals around these. Never mind mere Resolutions. 25% of people who set resolutions abandon them after 7days! Intentions and Focus Terms are great as icing on the cake, not as substitutes…
We don’t do much better with goals. Only 14% of Americans set goals, only 3% of them write them down, and only 1% of those review them daily when there is a 42% increase in goal achievement by merely setting them… This makes me sad for people’s ability to create what they want in their life…
So, if we go by these stats, it is very likely that you haven’t set goals and most likely that you haven’t written them down. Therefore, if you are serious about creating the life you want, if you are serious about not settling for a mediocre life, if you are serious about having your best human experience, then it is time to take goal setting seriously.
Seriously doesn’t mean this has to be complicated or a major production. Make it as easy as possible. Just go with the basics if you need a starting point: health, relationship and finances… You can tweak this to your heart’s desire of course, but if you make a commitment to embrace creating changes in these 3 areas you will make a significant improvement in your life…
Additionally, if we don’t want to struggle in achieving these goals, we have to make sure we don’t depend on willpower to work on these… Willpower only takes us so far and is limited… It depends on how we feel, our mood, our energy, our time, etc. If we are to achieve what we want, if we are to create the life we desire, we can’t leave it to chance…
How do we make sure we keep our goals forefront and actively work on them?
FIRST, we have to have a strong desire to achieve them. We have to have a strong Why behind them to inspire us and keep us motivated…
SECOND, we have to set ourselves up to achieve them, with structure and systems… This means we have to set up our daily life with routines around achieving these goals. And, we have to set up the routines with related Habits to automate our investment and take the effort out of it… Voila!
What do you say? Are you ready to really create the life you desire, your best life? Are you ready to set yourself up for an amazing decade? Are you ready for your best year yet? What do you say? Don’t be the majority statistic. Don’t let Blue Monday be a reality for you. Don’t let another year pass by without making a dent in creating the life you really want…
ASSIGNMENT: There is plenty of info out there on how. There are plenty of people having a say on all this. Your job is not to get more info and keep postponing your results. There is plenty on this blog anyway, even on this post alone, to help you get started… Your job is to decide you are going for it, commit to it and get started.
Here is your basic Strategy in its simplest form:
Step 1: Create 1 measurable stretch goal for your 3 life areas, with strong Whys for each
Step 2: Add 3 concrete recurring behaviors to each goal
Step 3: Integrate the recurring behaviors into your daily/weekly/monthly routine(s)
Don’t let this significant time pass you by. The sooner you plan and set your goals, the sooner you’ll start working on them, the longer you’ll have a chance to achieve them… You can rock this!
Make a commitment to no longer settle. Make a commitment to live your best life. Set yourself up to create what you desire right now. Seriously, do your Strategy now – start the week right, start the rest of your life right!
And, because we know it’s not easy to make changes on our own, we are creating some new goodies to help you with the Relationship & Connection area… Stay tuned for more details coming soon!
Complete the Assignment, and share your takeaway, insights, and results with a note in the Comments box at the end! I’d love to hear how you are using this content.
Happy Strategizing!
Copyright (c) 2020 Emma K. Viglucci. All rights reserved.
Want to Use this Article in Your Own Website or Publication?
Be our guest! Here is how, you MUST include: Emma K. Viglucci, LMFT is the Founder and Director of Metropolitan Marriage & Family Therapy, PLLC, a private practice that specializes in working with couples, she is the creator of the MetroRelationship™ philosophy and a variety of Successful Couple™ content that assist couples succeed at their relationship and their life. Stay Connected™ with Emma and receive weekly Connection Notes in your inbox with Personal Growth and Relationship Enrichment insights and strategies, visit: www.metrorelationship.com.
I wrote in the last issue about feeling like we are embarking in a New Era. Feels more and more like that every day. I’m so excited thinking on the fact that we are starting a whole new decade. We are at the beginning of a new huge chunk of time. It makes me dizzy to think about what this means.
To step back and think of what I’d like to create in the next 10 years of my Human Experience… Looking at this New Beginning this way is humbling, and so super Inspiring. Have you pondered similarly?
This brings me to today’s writing about Intentionally Co-Creating the life we Desire… As we start a New Year, and a New Decade!, this is the perfect time to Dream, Design, Develop, Display… Before I fully jump into the Topic, if you would allow me to invite you to work with us…
If you feel you would like support making changes, we are here for you! We can help you create the relationship and life you Desire… If you want to go for it, to rock this year and set up a stupendous decade, and are interested in working with us, why wait? You can get started on creating your awesomeness now. Why not?
Waiting for whatever to get started is just postponing what you Desire… Why do that to yourself? Let’s be nicer, kinder and more proactive in beautifully taking care of our Life this year, this decade… Yes? You can still take advantage of our super discounted 10-Session Package and get started right away… Let’s do this!
Today’s topic of Co-Creating the Life we Desire is part of the last element, Element5, in our Sequence for better implementing the Successful Couple Strategy™:
Element1 – Context & Mindset
Element2 – Communication & Alignment
Element3 – Clarity & Dynamics
Element4 – Connection & Intimacy
Element5 – Collaboration & Partnership
The Elements are fundamental and powerful in and of themselves, but this is the one where the changes being made become the most apparent, where they manifest in a variety of ways… Collaboration and Partnership are key for a thriving relationship. A relationship that is not only amazing in its own right, but creates a rippling Impact…
The state of our relationship allows the creation of our magnificent Life… Time and again in Visiting with couples it is obvious that they are stagnant, even struggling, in their life because the partners are getting in their own way and they haven’t figured out how to tap into the inherent synergy of the relationship… This is addressed through the prior Elements.
It is very challenging, a white-knuckling endeavor really, doing Life without having more fully figured out and addressed ourselves, and how we fit with our Partner… Once this piece of the puzzle fits, the rest of the puzzle just comes together beautifully with ease… Then focusing on creating our Masterpiece flows naturally and becomes the joyful endeavor it’s supposed to be.
Creating our Masterpiece has to do with Intentionally creating the life we desire. We get to Dream, Design, Develop and Display our ever-evolving Creation, throughout our Human Experience. This is where Living our life by Design requires Co-Creation. For we do not live in a vacuum, we live in relationship(s). And, that impacts and influences the quilt of our life…
Creating our Masterpiece also has to do with inviting, allowing and abiding by Inspiration. It is about having Vision, and not merely having an idea of what we want and setting goals to achieve it… It is grander and more meaningful than that. This is where we connect with our Why. Where we bring in Purpose. Where life makes sense. It has to do with having Inspired Intentionality™ at the heart of creating the life we desire…
It has to do with deciding, owning, who we truly are and are becoming more every day. It has to do with setting up our life to allow and promote this development. It has to do with deciding who we are as a couple, as a partnership. It has to do with defining our Personal and Couple Brand… It has to do with living authentically and honoring ourselves and our partnership.
Our Masterpiece is a weaving together of the Partners’ contributions, gifts, Essence. It is our responsibility to crack the code for a seamlessly weaving experience. So we do get to create a gorgeous and magnificent Masterpiece. We don’t want to end up with a mediocre masterpiece at the end of the day, for that would have been a wasted Human Experience… We want our Masterpiece to be our Legacy…
If all this sounds too grand to you, it’s time to wake up to your Life! It’s time to embrace what you signed-up for… Make this life the best it can be. Make your life a world-class life.
How? Dream, Design, Develop, Display… Here is your Prescription:
1 – Do your own Personal Development work (we can help!) so you don’t get in the way, encourage your partner to do the same… Combine your Learnings…
2 – Develop Courage to go for it! Own your Why, your Purpose. Make this your Life Lens, let it inform your Vision. Create a Joint Vision…
It’s the beginning of 2020, a New Year, a New Decade, a New Era, a New Version of You. You 2.0.Your Life 2.0. No matter where you are in your life, the formula above is pertinent… You can just be waking up to your life, or you can be a bit of a veteran on the Journey. Regardless, apply the Prescription to your current situation and you’ll be cruising along gracefully and joyfully to your best life experience yet…
ASSIGNMENT: Well? Are you going for it? If not, give it a good thought as to why you are holding yourself back from your Best Self and your Best Life… Isn’t it time to stop the nonsense and step up your game? Just saying…
If you are going for it, Yay! Congratulations! It might feel a bit scary, for we do have to deconstruct to reconstruct… Hang in there… You just made the best decision of your life… Seriously…
If you are going for it, have a heart-to-heart with your Honey about Committing to your Best Lives ever… If you find for whatever reason that you can’t do this, it’s totally fine and kind of normal… This just means YOU start the Journey… This is Your life after all… You are responsible for it. You are the boss of it…
Next is to decide what kind of life you want and to start making changes to create it…
Dream, Design, Develop, Display…
You can have a better life. It’s just a matter of how much you want it… I say, Just go for it already! And, Enjoy!
We completed this Series. Yay!! Stay tuned for a compilation of prior series for a richer integration… Here is to our Best Year yet. Here is to our Best Life!
Complete the Assignment, and share your takeaway, insights, and results with a note in the Comments box at the end! I’d love to hear how you are using this content.
Happy Creating!
Copyright (c) 2020 Emma K. Viglucci. All rights reserved.
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Emma K. Viglucci, LMFT has been in the mental health profession in varying capacities for the past 20+ years. She is the Founder and Director of metrorelationship.com a psychotherapy and coaching practice specializing in working with busy professional and entrepreneurial couples who are struggling getting on the same page and feeling connected. The work helps couples create a radiant and successful relationship and meaningful life by becoming a strong partnership and increasing their connection, intimacy, and fun. Emma is the creator of the MetroRelationship™ philosophy and the Successful Relationship Strategy™.
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