As we welcome the month of Thanks Giving, I become more aware of my own Gratefulness Practice. I become more attuned to everything I’m Thankful for, and specially for what I might have been taking for granted. There is so much to be thankful for!
Gratefulness is a research proven tool that helps rewire the brain (create different neuropathways) and transcend the Negativity Bias tendency and its impact. We cannot be in a state of Gratefulness and fear, anger, anxiety, depression and the rest of our negative states at the same time… With a consistent Practice there are also sustained benefits. A significant one to note, is that the Practice is the easiest investment to Be Happy!
So, I figured let’s start the Season right with the antidote to the Negativity Bias. Let’s be intentional about noticing all the awesomeness in our lives, and not taking anything for granted. Let’s be Thankful for all we have. Let’s embrace a richer Gratefulness Practice.
And, while we are at it, let’s fully embrace the meaning of this season. Here is a compilation of past Blog posts to inspire and guide yours:
ASSIGNMENT: On the next 4 Mondays, in your calendar, create these 7-day recurring Gratefulness Grub™ lunch appointments for their respective weeks –
Week#1 – Everyday at Lunch notice and appreciate what has been awesome so far that day
Week#2 – Everyday at Lunch take a moment to send someone a note of what you appreciate about them
Week#3 – Everyday at Lunch take a moment to send a note to a member of your Family-Of-Origin to thank them for something they’ve contributed to the Family
Week#4 – Everyday at Lunch take a moment to share with your Partner, or another significant person in your life if you are single, something they do that touches your heart
Now, this is what I’m talking about. As you exercise this muscle, you’ll be amazed at the things that come up to appreciate and be Thankful for… We do live a pretty privileged life… As you appreciate what you do have, your Abundance increases… Funny thing that is…
A Grateful heart, is an Abundant heart, is a Happy heart… Fully appreciate…
Complete the Assignment, and share your takeaway, insights, and results with a note in the Comments box at the end! I’d love to hear how you are using this content.
Happy Appreciating!
Copyright (c) 2019 Emma K. Viglucci. All rights reserved.
Want to Use this Article in Your Own Website or Publication?
Be our guest! Here is how, you MUST include: Emma K. Viglucci, LMFT is the Founder and Director of Metropolitan Marriage & Family Therapy, PLLC, a private practice that specializes in working with couples, she is the creator of the MetroRelationship™ philosophy and a variety of Successful Couple™ content that assist couples succeed at their relationship and their life. Stay Connected™ with Emma and receive weekly Connection Notes in your inbox with Personal Growth and Relationship Enrichment insights and strategies, visit: www.metrorelationship.com.
Do you find sometimes that when you are doing well or feeling amazing that you question it? That you hold yourself slightly back to prevent disappointment later, because it might just be too good to be true? Well, I had this bad habit for the longest time. Sometimes, I still catch myself going there, and of course immediately course correct. For I’ve learned that’s not too good to be true, but that’s how it’s supposed to be… Enjoy it when you feel it!
I also learned how to create this feeling and how to sustain it… This is not bragging, for this is the point of my work… This is sharing the cracked code!
I have been sharing about all aspects of this overtime, but for today’s issue I want to highlight select tactics to help you start, or continue, to create and sustain feeling amazing for yourself. But before we jump in, Why is feeling amazing important aside from the obvious? Because when we feel good, we can create our successful relationship and meaningful life…
We can’t possibly do these any justice when we go at them from a state of deprivation, exhaustion, lack, trigger, fear, ego and the like. It behooves us to take care of our stuffso we feel amazing in order to live our Best Life.
Note, people strive for achieving certain goals in pursuit of Happiness, feeling good, feeling amazing… But as I’ve shared before, Happiness is a choice, an ongoing practice, a part of the Journey, not the destination.
You can achieve goals and still not feel good. When you take care of feeling good, and I’m not talking about empty pleasures, then you’ve got a chance at creating your dream relationship with your partner and the life you desire. Feeling amazing is an inside job and a prerequisite for a life well lived, not the other way around…
If you are still feeling dissatisfied, empty, stuck, behind, betrayed, let down, disappointed, and such it is imperative that you shift how you look at life and your existence.
If you get sick frequently, have a chronic diagnosis, have a hard time sleeping, are under or over weight, live in a mediocre environment, have financial challenges, are struggling in your relationship, have difficulties with your children, are not making headways in your job, career or business, or just don’t feel right – it’s time to shift how you look at and approach things…
This is an inside job that you have to do, nobody else can do it for you. Stop blaming how you were raised, your circumstances, your partner, your boss, your neighbor, your mail-carrier, your dog or cat… It’s about nothing and nobody else but you…
Do you want to feel amazing, have a dreamy relationship and a rocking life? It’s all in your own beautiful hands. You have ALL the power, and don’t you dare believe otherwise… Call me if you do, and I’ll set you straight! (wink)
SO, let’s get to it. Here are tactics from our Success Strategies to help you feel amazing and creating your Best Life. To get you moving in the right direction with ease, joy and delight:
BE THE BOSS OF YOU (1) – If you are not in charge of yourself, you are giving your power away… When you give your power away, you are disempowered to feel and create what you want.
You are at others’ mercy – their whims, feelings, needs, preferences, choices, etc. You allow yourself to be blown with the win. You don’t get what you want no matter how much you address it, complain or yell about it. This is not about demanding respect from others in an attempt to get your power back… You have to take it, you have to own it…
Taking your power back is not about being a jerk, mean or aggressive. Taking your power back means setting boundaries that you uphold. The boundaries are for you! I remember an exchange with a client when this concept finally clicked for her. She couldn’t believe that all this time she had been trying to enforce consequences on her partner… Like “punishing a child”…
No, having consequences just means there is a result to the situation that is an Intentional Outcome set and carried out by you… You decide and stick to if you’ll participate in something, if you’ll pick up slack, if you’ll extend deadlines, if you’ll leave on time, if you’ll get in the car, if you’ll continue to engage in a conversation, if you’ll keep the job or the client, if you’ll go on that vacation, etc…
You see, you decide what YOU will and will not do depending on what is happening – the boundary is for you, you can enforce this… You cannot enforce anything on your partner, or others… This is a powerful concept. Once you fully embrace this, everything becomes a breeze – I promise.
STOP FIGHTING (2) – Fighting with your partner is the surest way to set the relationship back, even if just temporarily. I’m not talking about disagreeing. You will disagree. This is perfectly normal, and actually desired…
You can’t possibly agree on everything all the time, for you are two separate individuals which automatically implies having differences. This is good, this is part of the Journey… Having differences creates curiosity, interest and spark in the relationship…
Disagreements are a part of being with someone else. It’s what we do with the differences and how we manage the disagreements that is important. Allowing a disagreement to become a fight and allowing the fight to get out of hand is extremely detrimental to the relationship. It is like putting a knife to your Bond…
It takes a while to repair this cut and come back from it. This approach to relating is such a waste of resources. You set yourself back every time you have to invest on getting back to where you started from. And, you have to do this before you can get to anything else.
Sometimes people don’t get to anything else at all because they are constantly trying to regroup… They insist on allowing disagreements to get out of hand and then they pay the price. They get stuck with the status quo at best, or actually go backwards with frequent transgressions than don’t allow for regrouping… After a while, it’s impossible to come back, never mind create something amazing…
Stop being stubborn and going about interactions to prove your point and make your partner wrong. Nothing good comes of it. And, by the way, you are usually both right… Sorry, to break it to you. Do you want to prove you are right, or do you want to create a successful relationship? There are different ways to go about meeting your needs, being heard, seen, understood and the rest of it. Being logical and proving your case isn’t one of them.
TAKE CARE OF YOURSELF (3) – When we don’t feel good, have unmet needs, are easily triggered, and are a walking sourpuss where we can’t even stand ourselves, something needs to give. These are indications that we are not properly taking care of ourselves. And, it is our job to take care of ourselves. Nobody else will, nor should they.
What does taking care of ourselves mean? It means taking care of our physical, emotional, intellectual, and social needs. It means minding our spirituality. It means learning how to self-regulate, address unfinished business / heal wounds, grow and integrate ourselves, appropriately address triggers, being mindful not to trigger our partner and cocreate old patterns, it means being proactive about our wellbeing.
It means going the extra mile to make sure we operate from our Best Self. It means we commit to becoming our most Authentic Self, to Becoming who we are and beyond…
It means we take all this to the next level and hack ourselves for a superhuman experience… It means we fully embrace the body within our spirit and milk it for all it has to offer… This means really caring for ourselves all around… And, this takes on a gazillion forms. The trick is to find what resonates for us and to fully go for it…
GIVE YOUR PARTNER LOVE (4) – This should be simple, right? Just give your partner love. It is interesting how not simple it can become… People get so stuck on their side, their ways, what they want that they completely lose sight of their Partner, and the Relationship. They get stuck on a part of the relationship (themselves) that they miss out on the Whole…
We start all our sessions with Appreciations. Even when partners come in obviously hating each other at the moment. They struggle a bit with this sometimes, but they know the rules and the benefit of this.
They understand that even when they are struggling, even really disliking each other at the moment, that at the end of the day they do like and love each other… Because they are mad at that moment doesn’t mean that the good stuff is no longer there. Doing appreciations even when not in a good place is a good reminder of this… They can keep sight of the forest and not lose it for the tree.
So, regardless of what is happening, always keep your side of the bargain. When in doubt, keep going as if all is as you like… I know it’s challenging when we are triggered and not in a good place. But this is not a reason to throw out the baby with the bath water, to throw out all the skills and commitments, and such. Keep things going, keep investing, stay true to you and your commitment, honor your love and act from it.
When you don’t feel like it, it means you are in your head (your ego is getting the best of you!). Do what it takes to snap out of it and engage your heart. Keep showing your partner you care about them. The consistency rebuilds, builds, as opposed to creating more damage if you were not doing this or doing the opposite for that matter. This investment pays huge dividends.
SYNCHRONIZE (5) – It is terrible to feel overrun by all the commitments and demands of life, especially if we have children and have their lives to manage as well. Life can get hectic, spin out of control and takes us down if we let it. This is not the life we came to live. This is not a life well-lived. What is the point of having it all if all is kicking our butt.
There is a myriad of tools, techniques, systems and such to help us manage our life. But these don’t do us any good if we don’t create the time to learn about them, implement them, integrate them, conquer them. So, the first thing to get a handle and feeling better is to decommit, streamline, and create more space… I write a lot about this because I know how it gets people.
It cracks me up when I work with overwhelmed partners and we address this they refuse to simplify. They have all kinds of logic around their values, interests and things that they use as excuses to maintain their choices. The question becomes, how much do they value their peace of mind, health, harmony and joy in their home. For their approach is not giving them any of these…
After you make yourself simplify, then you manage what’s left with ease by synchronizing with your partner like the gears of a clock. You divide and conquer, having each other’s back, honoring your own and the other’s needs, and operating as a Team…
No going rogue, making assumptions, dropping the ball, not honoring commitments and the like. Have Sunday Synchronization Meetings™ to get on the same page, get current, assign tasks and coverage, confirm schedules, etc.
Nobody ever said creating your Best Life is easy. It doesn’t happen by accident. It happens by Design. It happens through accountability (personal ownership), investment, dedication and perseverance.
Assignment: What Element in your life seems to need attention – Mindset (1), Alignment (2), Dynamics/Patterns (3), Intimacy (4), Partnership (5)?
Choose the first one that pops out at you. Don’t overthink it. We already know nobody is perfect and you might want to address, tweak or upgrade more than one Element. That’s ok, you can do that but not all at once. You can come back to this for more… For now, focus on the one that stood out to you.
Make a commitment to clean your side of the street on that Element – do your side of the work, of the investing. Remember you have control and power only over yourself… Do use it, don’t give it away… And, don’t try to control another, it’s just a waste of resources…
Decide what will be the shift you’ll create, and how you’ll go about it. And, go for it. Consistently. Until you feel the shift…
You can feel amazing, have an amazing relationship and an amazing life. All you have to do is want it and Go For It, until you have it…
Complete the Assignment, and share your takeaway, insights, and results with a note in the Comments box at the end! I’d love to hear how you are using this content.
Happy Persevering!
Copyright (c) 2019 Emma K. Viglucci. All rights reserved.
Want to Use this Article in Your Own Website or Publication?
Be our guest! Here is how, you MUST include: Emma K. Viglucci, LMFT is the Founder and Director of Metropolitan Marriage & Family Therapy, PLLC, a private practice that specializes in working with couples, she is the creator of the MetroRelationship™ philosophy and a variety of Successful Couple™ content that assist couples succeed at their relationship and their life. Stay Connected™ with Emma and receive weekly Connection Notes in your inbox with Personal Growth and Relationship Enrichment insights and strategies, visit: www.metrorelationship.com.
It helps to still yourself, your mind, and quite all the noise… When we still ourselves, we connect with our Essence… We connect with our Higher Self. We connect with who we really are. The more we do this, the more we integrate (Mindsight) and Become who we really are…
Who you experience yourself to be day-in and day-out is a conglomerate of defense mechanisms, programming, and habits… We can have a very choppy experience of one-self and a messy and treacherous experience of life if these are not consciously and intentionally addressed…
When we connect more and more with our Higher Self and operate more and more from who we really are, life becomes more exquisite every moment… It becomes easier to know and use our Gifts, to know and pursue our Purpose, to know and be in Love. To be in Love with All. Yes, I love you as well…
It is marvelous to be in the flow. It is marvelous to be productive and creative. It is marvelous to crank. It is marvelous to focus on The One Thing. When we focus on the one thing, our energy is like a laser beam. It reaches the target with impact. When we are not focused, our energy disperses and might not even reach the target, never mind have impact… This is basic physics.
This basic concept has major implications for how we do our Life. When we still ourselves and connect with our Essence, we get in the flow, we can focus on the one thing and have major impact…
We can influence, help and support others with who we are, however we choose to manifest that… This is where the juice is at (Big Potential)… Here is where the Meaning is. Isn’t this the point at the end of the day? To have left our mark in some way, shape or form. A life in pursuit of pleasures is not a life lived as well as a life in pursuit of meaning…
It is marvelous to be in the flow. It is marvelous to see our loved ones for who they are, not who we make them out to be… It is marvelous to be in connection, to feel the love. It is marvelous to show and live our love. It is not about the fancy car, the big house or the millions in the bank. It is not about the fame.
Though these are social scripts that lure us, and sure they are nice perks. But to have an amazing life, a full human experience, is about being in connection. Is about having community. It’s about belonging. It’s about having loved and having loved well. It is about the relationships we create. Strong relationships support us in having longer, healthier and happier lives!
This is why I set up my Life to foster connection and meaning. This is why I set up my Practice to foster connection and meaning. This is why set up my work to Serve others and help them create connection and meaning… I’m lucky that my chosen profession is about creating strong relationships, and that it inherently focuses on the importance of connection.
What are the implications of this for your own life? How do you pursue meaning? How do you do connection and relationships? How do you do the relationship with your Partner? How do you set up your days to support you in having your best human experience? This are intense questions, but they don’t need to be intimidating. The key is to be Intentional about your life…
The easiest way to get on your right track is to design your Ideal Day and to strive for getting closer and closer to it every day, for life is but a big collection of days… And, your ideal day is but a daily routine made up of a set of powerful habits… Wellness, Connection and Success Habits…
Assignment: You can do, be or have ANYTHING you want… You can most certainly have the Life You Want… You just have to want it bad enough. You have to OWN it. You have to go for it. Make a commitment RIGHT NOW to go for it, let go of the excuses.
Walk through that imaginary threshold of your comfort zone into the mystery, the possibilities – just one step into it is all it takes to get going… Your exceptional life is not going to be created with how you do things now, or you would have created it already… You have to step up your game…
All you have to do is be COMMITTED and install your new Habits to support your Design… You have to have Relationship (Connection) and Meaning (Success) Habits. And, it’s challenging to focus on these when we don’t feel well… So, it’s imperative that you Wellness Habits as well, a Self-care Practice…
Let’s make this really simple to get you on your right track… Pick one new Wellness Habit you fully commit to embracing and start it now. Own it!
Research supports that the best lives are lives with strong Relationships and Meaning. It is up to us to make sure we rock these in our Life. That we Design our daily life with these in mind, and with all the support we need to do these well… Life doesn’t have to be difficult. It is what we make of it. Make it a good one with ease!
Complete the Assignment, and share your takeaway, insights, and results with a note in the Comments box at the end! I’d love to hear how you are using this content.
Happy Committing!
Copyright (c) 2019 Emma K. Viglucci. All rights reserved.
Want to Use this Article in Your Own Website or Publication?
Be our guest! Here is how, you MUST include: Emma K. Viglucci, LMFT is the Founder and Director of Metropolitan Marriage & Family Therapy, PLLC, a private practice that specializes in working with couples, she is the creator of the MetroRelationship™ philosophy and a variety of Successful Couple™ content that assist couples succeed at their relationship and their life. Stay Connected™ with Emma and receive weekly Connection Notes in your inbox with Personal Growth and Relationship Enrichment insights and strategies, visit: www.metrorelationship.com.
I’ve had an interesting coming together of influences this week to inspire today’s topic (in the end only a minor detour from our Editorial Calendar). I had a request to write about addiction, and of course today is World Mental Health Day… So, I’ve decided to combine these and write about them in our usual context… [If you are in immediate need of assistance, please refer to the Hotlines provided here]
There are a number of addictions that impact our Journey. The most common addictions that you might be familiar with, and possibly even have in your own life, include:
Behavior Related Addictions – Gambling, Internet, Gaming, Shopping, Plastic Surgery, Sex & Love, Codependency, Risk Taking, Anger, Exercise, Work
Yes, I’m adding Codependency as an addiction… This has also been called “Relationship Addiction”… In a nutshell, this is when a partner is so focused on the other partner’s wellbeing that they lose sight of taking care of themselves, and they have a difficult time changing this pattern of behavior…
Most of my writing has this lens as an underlying theme… I usually cover this from the angle of not Owning Ourselves and Loving Too Much… And, even have a simple test to determine if one loves too much – you can get it here: 40 Signs that You Love TOO Much
Addictions alter the functioning of the brain and hence impact Mental Health, some are even considered a Mental Illness themselves, and frequently they are co-morbid, co-occurring, or dual-diagnosis with other Mental Illnesses (anxiety, depression, ADD/ADHD, OCD, and so on)…
Addictions and Mental Illness are very intricately connected sometimes making it difficult to determine if either is the cause of the other… They affect brain structure (refer to the image below) and levels of neurochemicals affecting overall functioning and wellbeing.
The main neurotransmitters affected include:
Serotonin – associated with regulating body temperate, sleep, arousal, appetite, mood, pain
Dopamine – related to experiences of pleasure and the reward-learning process
Norepinephrine – helps moderate stress response
When our Mental Health (brain) is impacted, everything in our life is impacted…
We are born with a basic brain organ that continues to develop as we grow. It is actually not fully formed until our early 20s (Brainstorm)! The interactions, experiences and lifestyle we have growing up impact how our brain forms, develops and functions… This in turns informs our personality, gifts, skills, perceptions and pretty much everything else about us.
Addictions have been associated with attachment injuries and trauma (less than perfect parenting…) growing up, which impact the development of the connection center in the brain and the ability to self-regulate… This has obvious implications for relationship success…
Thankfully, the brain doesn’t stay static – it has neuroplasticity which means we can further develop it, enhance it, change it, and even heal it as desired. This is amazing news because we are not stuck with the brain we have (The Brain Warrior’s Way)… Whatever has been the negative impact on our brain it can be corrected.
Below is an image of brain scans conducted by Dr. Amen, psychiatrist, brain expert and founder of the Amen Clinics, that show a healthy brain and afflicted brains. Believe or not, he has demonstrated that the afflicted brains can pretty much go back to looking like the healthy one!
We can reverse any developmental and lifestyle negative impacts that have affected our brain. This means we can biohack our brain for relationship and life success!
So, where do we start? We start with the basics – self-regulating to begin rewiring, rebuilding, and further developing the parts that plays such a significant role in how we feel, connect and show up in our life…
Self-regulation can be tackled from so many angles… A basic and very accessible way is through Lifestyle changes… Sleep, nutrition, exercise, self-care, mindfulness practices and the like are key elements for creating Mental Health… Hence all the focus in my writing on building great daily routines with powerful wellness, connection and success habits…
It’s never too late to fix your brain and create your best life!
Assignment: If you know you want to have your best life – live a long, healthy, productive, impactful and joyous life, then you have to do what it takes to make that happen… Are you willing to do that? Or, are you ok settling for mediocracy? If you’d like to join me in creating our best life, then the first step is in identifying what in your lifestyle is messing with your brain…
Then, create a plan to remove that – replacing it with a better Habit to help with your Discipline around it… And, finally is putting the pieces in place to support implementing your plan. Have at it, and have fun!
If it was easy to have a World Class Life, everyone would have one… Will you do what it takes to have yours? Decide now, and go for it!
Complete the Assignment, and share your takeaway, insights, and results with a note in the Comments box at the end! I’d love to hear how you are using this content.
Happy Fixing!
Copyright (c) 2019 Emma K. Viglucci. All rights reserved.
Want to Use this Article in Your Own Website or Publication?
Be our guest! Here is how, you MUST include: Emma K. Viglucci, LMFT is the Founder and Director of Metropolitan Marriage & Family Therapy, PLLC, a private practice that specializes in working with couples, she is the creator of the MetroRelationship™ philosophy and a variety of Successful Couple™ content that assist couples succeed at their relationship and their life. Stay Connected™ with Emma and receive weekly Connection Notes in your inbox with Personal Growth and Relationship Enrichment insights and strategies, visit: www.metrorelationship.com.
Do you have what it takes to live your best life? As I embrace this concept more and more, for myself and to bring to you of course, I’m just in awe at the gorgeousness life has to offer if we actually tune ourselves to it and allow it…
Things started turning around for me a while back when I learned to Let Go… Now, if you know me, you know I’m in no way a slacker, passive, or easy going… LOL I still love to lead, take charge, plan and orchestrate, make things happen, work hard, deconstruct obstacles, etc…
So, what do I mean by Let Go? I mean Trusting that all is working out as it’s supposed to… That things are happening For me and not To me… That we don’t have to white-knuckle life to make it what we want… That life is a great old game we have to learn to play right, by our own rules… When we get this and don’t give our power away to our life circumstances, including our Partner!, it’s when the magic starts to happen…
For you see, our approach is usually to do life by focusing on what others are or are not doing, specially our Partner… By how we can get them to do stuff. By how we want them to be. By how we want them to treat us. By what we can get from them. Or such. And, by Golly this is the completely opposite approach to create our most wonderful life…
You might be thinking, Yeah, that’s right. I want to be treated right, I want respect, I want support, I want my partner to cherish me, and so on… But, I’ll let you in on a little secret: You can’t ask for these things and get them… This is not how this works. Life is not about getting from others, demanding form others, imposing on others.
You might be thinking, How is that possibly an imposition? Respect, support, care and the rest of it is part of being in a relationship. It’s a given and should be done automatically. That’s what marriage is all about. I have news for you, that’s not True. It might seem that way, but that’s because that’s the social script we live by…
I know this is a controversial position – just bear with me for a moment. If it was so automatic, and such a given, and such a part of how things should be, then why do so many marriages fail? I’ll tell you why, because people focus on the wrong things. They stick unwaveringly to the script, they don’t question its validity and how it applies to them. They continue to focus outside of themselves, where they have no power!
Believe me, I get it. We all want those things, and they all are part of the definition of marriage… The point is that we can’t create an amazing relationship by expecting our partner to do right by us, by complaining about it when they don’t, and waiting for them to do it right. Man, this is a divorce waiting to happen. I’ve seen it happen unfortunately when people just refuse to Let Go of this script…
Nothing is a given, we have to Cocreate it… We have to choose to stop following the herd and living a mediocre life, having a tolerable relationship and accepting its demise when it’s not working… We have to choose to stop being part of the 95% who just live life blindly and by default. We have to choose to have our full Human Experience, and full on Play the Game of Life…
What does this mean? This means we fully Own ourselves, we focus on what we are doing, how we are doing it, how we show up, what we tolerate, and such. And, we do this by us Being, Becoming, our best version of ourselves… Again, not by telling our partner what they should do for us, or how to be for us…
When we refocus like this, it’s incredible what starts to happen. All the things we wanted, demanded, and complained about are resolved. We actually get what we want!
I know it’s almost impossible to believe, but it’s True. The reason this works is because when we show up differently, we invite something different… This is Cocreation at its best. We have no control over what our partner does, but we have control over what we do (we have the choice to even address our subconscious driving our stuff – we have ALL the control).
When we approach our life this way marvelous things start to happen… You even cocreate things that you might have never voiced… It’s a truly amazing experience… But don’t just take my word for it, please have a little faith and try out for yourself…
I promise that when you refocus this way you CAN create the relationship, and life, you were beating your head against the wall to have before. Now, it actually does happen easily… Just give it a try… Try keeping the focus only on what you are doing, on Being who you want to be, and on continuing Becoming your best self. The rest just comes!
Stop victimizing yourself. Take charge and do You well! I know you can do it!
Assignment: Stop the looping around in your head playing around with your logic, convincing yourself that your position is right, and making your partner wrong. This is not the way out, nor the solution to your current unhappiness…
Try to suspend logic, your protective Ego, and instead get in touch with your heart, your gut, your Core, Inner Authentic, Higher Self… This part of you can Transcend the micro infractions your partner might inflict on you through their imperfection…
This part of you is Magnificent. When you show up with this part, you become irresistible and your partner wants to do nothing but please you… And, they do it just like you like it, and it’s effortless… (Also, you’ll be able to not get triggered or bothered when they are a little off because their offness is actually so irrelevant in the whole scheme of things…). Make an appointment with yourself to get in touch with your Self… Honor it. Embrace it. Enjoy it!
I believe you have what it takes you create your best life. You just have to want it, and make a decision to go for it…
Complete the Assignment, and share your takeaway, insights, and results with a note in the Comments box at the end! I’d love to hear how you are using this content.
Happy Owning!
Copyright (c) 2019 Emma K. Viglucci. All rights reserved.
Want to Use this Article in Your Own Website or Publication?
Be our guest! Here is how, you MUST include: Emma K. Viglucci, LMFT is the Founder and Director of Metropolitan Marriage & Family Therapy, PLLC, a private practice that specializes in working with couples, she is the creator of the MetroRelationship™ philosophy and a variety of Successful Couple™ content that assist couples succeed at their relationship and their life. Stay Connected™ with Emma and receive weekly Connection Notes in your inbox with Personal Growth and Relationship Enrichment insights and strategies, visit: www.metrorelationship.com.
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With this Mini Course learn how to immediately Break your Impasse, Improve your Communication, Increase your Intimacy, Connection and Fun, & Create a Strong Partnership...
And with Emma’s weekly Love rich with Personal Development & Relationship Enrichment know-how, announcements, resources and more straight into your inbox.
Emma K. Viglucci, LMFT has been in the mental health profession in varying capacities for the past 20+ years. She is the Founder and Director of metrorelationship.com a psychotherapy and coaching practice specializing in working with busy professional and entrepreneurial couples who are struggling getting on the same page and feeling connected. The work helps couples create a radiant and successful relationship and meaningful life by becoming a strong partnership and increasing their connection, intimacy, and fun. Emma is the creator of the MetroRelationship™ philosophy and the Successful Relationship Strategy™.
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