When our relationship is not perfect or when we struggle in our relationship, we might have the mindset that – marriage is hard, being in a relationship is a lot of work, and other such nonsense…
I get it that sometimes our relationship can be really frustrating and that we might feel like we spin our wheels and can’t make the changes we desire. I get it because I’ve been there, and because I see this with the many clients we’ve served over the years.
But because we are feeling frustrated, and we might be feeling stuck our relationship and status don’t warrant such hard assessments and labels. This pejorative view further influences how we view and approach our relationship and our partner. This is the filter that affects everything else from our communication to our collaboration…
Then we enter into additional disagreements, conflict and disconnect where it might feel impossible to create change in our relationship and to create the relationship we desire- but it is not.
The 5 Elements of our Successful Relationship Strategy™ cover the targeted areas to focus on with your partner to seamlessly create a transformation in your relationship. When we intentionally focus on showing up differently, improving our skills, using better tools, changing our patterns and investing in our relationship in these areas- there is no way not to create change in our relationship…
Element1 – Context & Mindset: Empower Yourself– this has to do with all things of the mind. Including upleveling mindset, changing thought patterns, addressing limiting believes, reprogramming negativity bias, and more…
>> So you stop feeling stuck and break the impasse…
~ Partnership Mindset – This is where we embrace a allies vs enemies mindset…
~ Effective Boundaries – This is where we fully own ourselves vs owning our partner…
Element2 – Communication & Alignment: Improve Understanding– this has to do with all things regarding communication. Including having proper conversations, addressing concerns and issues, resolving conflict, repairing, apologizing and more…
>>So you easily get on the same page and understand each other better…
~ Simple Powerful Skills – This is where we improve our communication tools and skills…
~ Speak for Yourself – This is where we get our partner to understand us…
Element3 – Clarity & Dynamics: Change Patterns– this has to do with all things involving emotional patterns and programs. Including addressing our relationship loop, resolving having the same old fight, stopping the power struggle, increasing self-regulation and resilience, and more…
>> So you understand why you have the same old issues creeping up and change the patterns
~ Meet Your Needs – This is where you learn how to meet and get your needs met…
~ Give Something Different – This is where you optimize how you meet your partner’s needs…
Element4 – Connection & Intimacy: Deepen Connection– this has to do with all things on connection and intimacy. Including how to create, sustain and deepen connection, how to increase and expand intimacy, how to enrich exchanges and have meaningful interactions, and more…
>> So reignite your love, deepen your connection, and increase your intimacy
~ Connection Habits – This where you automate improving your connection…
~ Really Date Your Partner – This is where you bring the passion back…
Element5 – Collaboration & Partnership: Become a Team– this has to do with all things partnership and working better together. Including how to have a life vision and set achievable goals, create a smooth-running household, share responsibility, enjoy coparenting, and more…
>> So you create a strong partnership and a harmonious, joyful and loving home and beautiful life
~ Working Life Vision – This is where you align and create a north star for your life…
~ Divide and Conquer Approach – This is where you have you own and each other’s back…
You CAN create a successful relationship and meaningful life, just be intentional about it!
PSS: Do you need support taking yourself, your relationship, and your life to the next level- actually living a healthy, happy, harmonious and overall abundant life?
Copyright (c) 2023 Emma K. Viglucci. All rights reserved.
Want to Use this Article in Your Own Website or Publication? Be our guest! Here is how, you MUST include: Emma K. Viglucci, LMFT is the Founder and Director of Metropolitan Marriage & Family Therapy, PLLC, a private practice that specializes in working with couples, she is the creator of the MetroRelationship™ philosophy and the Successful Couple Strategy™ that assist couples succeed at their relationship and their life. Stay Connected™ with Emma and receive weekly connection notes in your inbox with Personal Development and Relationship Enrichment insights and strategies, visit: www.metrorelationship.com.
When people think of being in relationship or marriage, they don’t usually think of creating freedom. Quite the opposite is true, as with commitment usually comes exclusivity and responsibility which most would probably not equate as definitions of freedom…
The thing is that most don’t go about their relationship properly and that’s why they experience it as limiting, confining, and restrictive… I want to offer you that the opposite can actually be true. That you can create Freedom with your relationship…
As we embrace a gentler approach to life this month with our Monthly Theme to Bask, I invite you to take a similar approach to how you view your partner and your relationship. Let’s upgrade your Relationship Mindset to one that is freeing, refreshing, and empowering…
Just remember that we are as free as we allow ourselves to be… I usually love to refer to the book A Man’s Search for Meaning, by Perter Frankl, when I talk about this concept. We can be in a concentration camp and still be free…
Let’s play at embracing our freedom to be ourselves more, to create our successful relationship, to create our best life, and to enjoy all the little blessings… And, let’s go about it with ease…
Embrace your freedom to go with ease, to be gentle, and to chill…
PSS: Do you need support taking yourself, your relationship, and your life to the next level- actually living a healthy, happy, harmonious and overall abundant life?
Copyright (c) 2023 Emma K. Viglucci. All rights reserved.
Want to Use this Article in Your Own Website or Publication? Be our guest! Here is how, you MUST include: Emma K. Viglucci, LMFT is the Founder and Director of Metropolitan Marriage & Family Therapy, PLLC, a private practice that specializes in working with couples, she is the creator of the MetroRelationship™ philosophy and the Successful Couple Strategy™ that assist couples succeed at their relationship and their life. Stay Connected™ with Emma and receive weekly connection notes in your inbox with Personal Development and Relationship Enrichment insights and strategies, visit: www.metrorelationship.com.
As we go deeper into the summer months, a time to have more fun, replenish, and bask, let’s use this opportunity to make choices that support and enrich our relationship and our life. Let’s make choices that empower us to be our Best Self and have a truly harmonious, joyful and love filled life. This means we must own all aspects of ourselves and our life and shift, tweak, and upgrade anything we want to change. With personal ownership comes freedom… The more we own ourselves and everything in our life, the more we have the power to make the changes we want…
Where would you start? What changes are you looking to make in your life? Does it have to do with wellness, relationship, success? Something else?
Wellness includes things like mental health, feeling good emotionally and physically, having energy and vitality, being healthy, being fit, looking good
Relationship includes things like feeling secure in your relationship, sharing a life vision with your partner, being able to easily get on the same page, meeting your own and each other’s needs, creating and sustaining a deep and meaningful connection, have great intimacy and fun, and having each other’s back and collaborating to create your Best Lives and your Life Vision
Success includes things like being proud of your profession and life endeavors, being productive, contributing, making a difference, and attaining financial freedom
Regardless of the area you are looking to improve, enhance and enrich, the key is to fully own it… Whenever we want to make changes and the changes don’t stick, we are quick to come up with reasons and excuses as to why something didn’t work. We are also great at blaming others and our circumstances…
Do you know what would happen if you took 100% responsibility for yourself, your relationship, and your life? Yes, even your relationship… More on this below. What would happen is that you would create what you desire! What a concept…
Taking 100% responsibility for our relationship means we do our side of the investing- we be the Best Partner we can be. We work, heal, evolve anything that gets in the way of giving love and receiving love. That gets us triggered, showing up with defenses, interacting from blame, distrust, and protection. That has us interacting with criticism, manipulation, and control…
~ We can really do some serious damage in our relationship if we are not careful…
~ We can also create the most amazing relationship… When we show up with awesomeness, we invite awesomeness back, and we create awesomeness…
~ It is up to us what we allow ourselves to create…
We have the choice as to how much we’ll own our life or how much we’ll victimize ourselves…
You have a choice
When we exercise the choice to fully own everything in our life and fully take charge of how we show up and who we become, we gain the freedom of not being at the mercy and whim of others and the wrenches life might through at us… For we have control over ourselves how we react, what we focus on, what we invest in, how we do our days, EVERYTHING… Then, oh boy- that’s when the magic happens…
Taking this much ownership of ourselves and our life, can’t but result in the masterpiece we are seeking to create… This is how we become who we truly are… This is how we have the best relationship with our partner. This is how we crack the code of life. This is how we win at the game of life. This is how we have our best human experience.
Exercise your choice
Which area will you choose right now to focus on fully owning? On fully showing up to? Gently, lovingly, but assuredly taking charge of it? Make your choice right now. There is never a better time like the present time… Now choose what aspects of that area you’ll play with first…
Wellness – Upgrading your mindset, feeling your feelings, embracing mindfulness, cleaning your nutrition, improving your sleep, enhancing your exercise, upleveling your grooming, and so on
Relationship – Creating a joint vision, having difficult conversations, meeting your and your partner’s needs, implementing connection habits, expanding your intimate repertoire, having adventures together, creating a divide and conquer approach to achieving your goals, and so on
Success – Taking charge of your day, reducing amount and length of meetings, creating focus work time, batching your tasks, chunking your time for specific work, having good follow through, getting and giving mentoring, and so on
What tactics and habits will you integrate into your life to start making the changes you desire?
Just the mere thought of choosing to fully own everything is super empowering and exhilarating…
It can also feel frightening, as now it is up to you to create what you want, there are no more excuses… But not to worry you can always get support like psychotherapy, couples therapy, or coaching.
Whatever camp you are on, know that this decision to fully own your whole life is the most important decision you have ever made… This is what gives you freedom and the power to truly have everything you desire.
PSS: Do you need support taking yourself, your relationship, and your life to the next level- actually living a healthy, happy, harmonious and overall abundant life?
Copyright (c) 2023 Emma K. Viglucci. All rights reserved.
Want to Use this Article in Your Own Website or Publication? Be our guest! Here is how, you MUST include: Emma K. Viglucci, LMFT is the Founder and Director of Metropolitan Marriage & Family Therapy, PLLC, a private practice that specializes in working with couples, she is the creator of the MetroRelationship™ philosophy and the Successful Couple Strategy™ that assist couples succeed at their relationship and their life. Stay Connected™ with Emma and receive weekly connection notes in your inbox with Personal Development and Relationship Enrichment insights and strategies, visit: www.metrorelationship.com.
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Emma K. Viglucci, LMFT has been in the mental health profession in varying capacities for the past 20+ years. She is the Founder and Director of metrorelationship.com a psychotherapy and coaching practice specializing in working with busy professional and entrepreneurial couples who are struggling getting on the same page and feeling connected. The work helps couples create a radiant and successful relationship and meaningful life by becoming a strong partnership and increasing their connection, intimacy, and fun. Emma is the creator of the MetroRelationship™ philosophy and the Successful Relationship Strategy™.
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