Ah summertime… What is summertime if not a time for repose and realignment? What about a time to heal, evolve, expand? What about a time to reconnect with our partner and reset our relationship? What about a time to uplevel our life through some couple fun?
Anything goes, really, as long as we are intentional and investing in creating the relationship and life we love…
A softer approach to our relationship helps turn things around and enrich our relationship… Are you familiar with the concept of having a softer life? Well, here I extrapolate that concept and apply it to our relationship. A Softer Relationship™ is one that allows for more ease, harmony, joy, connection and love…
In today’s video, I cover the 5 Key Tactics to help us embrace a Softer Relationship™. I talk about Making Assumptions, Assigning Motives, Giving Grace, Giving Appreciations, and Delighting Our Partner… These are tactics that when embraced they remove the layer that creates drama, disturbances, and disconnect in our relationship. They help the partner create more authenticity, vulnerability, availability, safety and so much more. Enjoy!
PSS: Do you need support taking yourself, your relationship, and your life to the next level- actually living a healthy, happy, harmonious and overall abundant life?
Copyright (c) 2024 Emma K. Viglucci. All rights reserved.
Want to Use this Article in Your Own Website or Publication? Be our guest! Here is how, you MUST include: Emma K. Viglucci, LMFT is the Founder and Director of Metropolitan Marriage & Family Therapy, PLLC, a private practice that specializes in working with couples, she is the creator of the MetroRelationship™ philosophy and the Successful Couple Strategy™ that assist couples succeed at their relationship and their life. Stay Connected™ with Emma and receive weekly connection notes in your inbox with Personal Development and Relationship Enrichment insights and strategies, visit: www.metrorelationship.com.
Some might believe they love unconditionally, because they believe that’s what’s expected and what’s appropriate in love… But upon further inspection it is obvious that their love is conditional… Is there a right way to love? Should we love unconditionally? Or should we, what some might consider, be smart about it and love conditionally?
In my book, love has nothing to do with conditions…
Now, this doesn’t mean we put up with abusive situations, or situations that don’t honor who we are, or that don’t support our purpose and our life Journey… This also doesn’t mean we are to be doormats and have no expectations in our relationship… All these things could be true, and we could still love the other…
So, when people believe love is conditional on certain things, that doesn’t really add up because we can obviously love no matter what, codependence and other dynamics and conditions aside…
But because we can love no matter what, it doesn’t mean we put up with a less than radiant and successful relationship… One that helps us become our best self… One that enriches us and makes our journey better…
~ We invest in cultivating our love, so it doesn’t get tied up with conditions and eroded by unmet expectations…
~ We invest in creating the best relationship to support and help expand our love…
This means we create the perfect space for our love. And this doesn’t mean a perfect relationship- there is no such thing. But it means a relationship in progress to its fullest potential…
Now this is journey worth investing in- playing in this realm and experiencing the rewards it yields is one of the best feelings… It’s so satisfying and fulfilling to take the interactions to the next level where both partners feel fully heard, understood, and accepted. Where they feel appreciated for who they are and what they contribute to the relationship and the other’s life. Where they feel deeply connected, and nourished and enlivened by their interactions.
Let’s commit to playing in the realm of having a relationship in progress to its fullest potential, where our love can thrive and shine…
PSS: Do you need support taking yourself, your relationship, and your life to the next level- actually living a healthy, happy, harmonious and overall abundant life?
Copyright (c) 2024 Emma K. Viglucci. All rights reserved.
Want to Use this Article in Your Own Website or Publication? Be our guest! Here is how, you MUST include: Emma K. Viglucci, LMFT is the Founder and Director of Metropolitan Marriage & Family Therapy, PLLC, a private practice that specializes in working with couples, she is the creator of the MetroRelationship™ philosophy and the Successful Couple Strategy™ that assist couples succeed at their relationship and their life. Stay Connected™ with Emma and receive weekly connection notes in your inbox with Personal Development and Relationship Enrichment insights and strategies, visit: www.metrorelationship.com.
As we embark in this New Year, it is up to us what kind of experience we have and what we are able to realize… Even though a New Year brings with it the promise and excitement of newness, it can feel like a letdown when January 1st rolls around, and life is as it was the day before… Why should the first of the year be any different than any other day? The thing is that It is. Because we say so… We can have a new beginning at any time, including on the first of the year…
So why then, it the first of the year not any different? Well, I challenge you to reconsider if it actually isn’t…
For you see we are always changing, nothing is EVER the same… We are in a constant state of flux. No two moments are the same. Change is actually the only constant in life… The first of the year is different than the day before and than any other day before it and after it…
When things feel stuck, the same, and not able to change it’s because we choose to keep constructing the same story about our experience… We are the ones that choose what we observe, what dots we connect, and what meaning we assign our experience…
If we have the same old thoughts, the same old observations, the same old reactions, the same old conversations, the same old expectations- guess what? We create a very predictable life… We continue to recreate the same thing over and over…
If we are really about creating some new and having a new beginning, all we need to do is suspend the usual… Quiet down the chatter in our head. Mind the habits we engage in from the moment we open our eyes in the morning. Intentionally choose what to focus on and give our attention to at any given moment. Stay open to the flow of life. Look for the synchronicities, the serendipity, the blessings, the magic… Stay in expectation of surprise, delight, and joy.
When we set up our day to live this way, when we align with what is important to us, when we cultivate this state, and when we orient ourselves to realize our fullest potential of our human experience, then that’s the experience we have…
We experience a delightful life- where when we are sick we are just upgrading our body, when something breaks it’s a chance to upgrade it, when someone lets us down it’s an opportunity for a meaningful conversation, and so on…
Then everything is just marvelous. Life is all you desire it to be, and it’s pregnant with promise and blessings…
PSS: Do you need support taking yourself, your relationship, and your life to the next level- actually living a healthy, happy, harmonious and overall abundant life?
Copyright (c) 2024 Emma K. Viglucci. All rights reserved.
Want to Use this Article in Your Own Website or Publication? Be our guest! Here is how, you MUST include: Emma K. Viglucci, LMFT is the Founder and Director of Metropolitan Marriage & Family Therapy, PLLC, a private practice that specializes in working with couples, she is the creator of the MetroRelationship™ philosophy and the Successful Couple Strategy™ that assist couples succeed at their relationship and their life. Stay Connected™ with Emma and receive weekly connection notes in your inbox with Personal Development and Relationship Enrichment insights and strategies, visit: www.metrorelationship.com.
A key element of a successful relationship is having good communication skills and tools. When we don’t, that’s when our relationship is riddled with misunderstanding, conflict, and fighting. This in turn leads to creating friction between the partners that only manifests into issues and disconnection in the relationship.
But it is optimal for creating our successful relationship to have a wider range of skills and tools. When partners improve their communication skills they can:
~ More easily get on the same page ~ Be better able to understand each other ~ Address their needs ~ Deepen their connection ~ Uplevel their collaboration
Improving communication skills is a must have to make all other facets of the relationship go smooth. When we can properly communicate with our partner we can address anything and create anything.
Things that usually don’t get addressed because the partners are afraid the conversation will turn into a fight include things like:
Expectations and thoughts about things
Broken promises and other disappointments
Feelings, needs and preferences
Wishes, dreams and goals
Desires for intimate life
Issues in the home
Challenges different areas of life
And more…
Gaining greater communication skills doesn’t have to be difficult.
In today’s video, I show you 3 levels of communication to start addressing any difficulties you might be having getting along with your partner.
I talk about, how to: ~ Improve Communication ~ Deepen Communication ~ Enhance Communication
Focus on improving your communication and you’ll create immediate ease and joy in your relationship…
PSS: Do you need support taking yourself, your relationship, and your life to the next level- actually living a healthy, happy, harmonious and overall abundant life?
Copyright (c) 2023 Emma K. Viglucci. All rights reserved.
Want to Use this Article in Your Own Website or Publication? Be our guest! Here is how, you MUST include: Emma K. Viglucci, LMFT is the Founder and Director of Metropolitan Marriage & Family Therapy, PLLC, a private practice that specializes in working with couples, she is the creator of the MetroRelationship™ philosophy and the Successful Couple Strategy™ that assist couples succeed at their relationship and their life. Stay Connected™ with Emma and receive weekly connection notes in your inbox with Personal Development and Relationship Enrichment insights and strategies, visit: www.metrorelationship.com.
One of the main reasons couples argue is because they are not on the same page. It’s not so much because they might disagree on something, but it has more to do with knowing and understanding where each partner is coming from. Partners usually make assumptions about what is going on, what their partner wants, and that they both want the same thing… Partners don’t always share what’s on their mind, their wishes, and desires and expect their partner to somehow know… Not sharing expectations with your partner is a sure way to not be on the same page, to have disagreements, conflicts, arguments, and fights.
There are many reasons that partners might not share their expectations with each other, some include that:
~ They might not realize that it’s easier to get on the same page when the parties involved know what’s on the table
~ They might be afraid to share for fear of being misunderstood, judged, and rejected
~ They might be worried that their partner knowing what they want might cause disagreements, conflicts, arguments, and fights
What they don’t realize is that as they each operate from their own set of beliefs, opinions, expectations, and wishes that they are more likely than not to run into trouble. Can’t be on the same team, collaborate and work towards achieving a common goal if the partners are focused on different things and doing things in different ways.
When the partners are not aligned, they are each going in their own direction making it impossible to make progress creating the home life, family, lifestyle, and life they want. Not to mention that there is friction and conflict at every step of the way, making it challenging to get along, feel good about the relationship, and cultivate connection and embrace their love.
It is important for partners to get on the same page about their expectations so they can align and better collaborate, creating a strong partnership and successful relationship…
Clarifying Expectations
The first order of business is to own for oneself what our beliefs are about all areas of life and relationship to make sure we have a clean mindset to draw expectations from… If we have limiting beliefs, a lack mentality, and just overall poor mental hygiene, we are likely to have faulty expectations out of the gate.
Then not only would we not have communicated our expectations to our partner, but they are unrealistic and potentially out there as well. Talk about setting up our relationship to be a struggle…
So, back to the first order of business, review all the areas for yourself first. Scrutinizing your beliefs about them as to:
~ How realistic they are ~ Do they make sense ~ How did you come to believe them ~ Did you choose these or were they passed down to you ~ Do you want to keep them ~ Do they need to be upgraded ~ And so on
Clean up what you believe about each area to be really representative of where you stand with things. Fully own what you believe in its cleanest form.
The areas, topics, and concepts to review include things like:
Dating
Intimacy
Connection
Affection
Touch
Sex
Sexuality
Body
Gender
Gender Roles
Relationship
Commitment
Marriage
In-laws
Husband
Wife
Spouse
Partner
Partnership
Pregnancy
Nursing
Children
Parenting
Discipline
Education
Health
Illness
Death
Weight
Priorities
Goals
Collaboration
Support
Chores
House Keeping
Leisure
Vacation
Career
Success
Finances
Debt
Money
Spirituality
Religion
Politics
Social Systems
Social Institutions
And so on…
Explore as much or a little as makes sense for where you are in your relationship and add other things that are important to you that might not be captured on the list. Then you are ready to share with your partner…
As you can probably see, these are big things that we have all sorts of ideas, preferences, and expectations about that we might not be fully aware ourselves and that are impacting our relationship and our life.
And, as you can probably see, these can wreak some havoc in our interactions and our relationship if we are not proactive about what we belief and expect and about making that known…
Just remember when you have your sharing session with your partner, to be gentle, open, understanding, accepting and mindful. Both your sides are equally as valid, and you might find that you diverge on things.
That’s ok. That’s the point of this exercise. To find the differences so you can work on getting on the same page for improving your collaboration, partnership and overall relationship and life.
PSS: Do you need support taking yourself, your relationship, and your life to the next level- actually living a healthy, happy, harmonious and overall abundant life?
Copyright (c) 2023 Emma K. Viglucci. All rights reserved.
Want to Use this Article in Your Own Website or Publication? Be our guest! Here is how, you MUST include: Emma K. Viglucci, LMFT is the Founder and Director of Metropolitan Marriage & Family Therapy, PLLC, a private practice that specializes in working with couples, she is the creator of the MetroRelationship™ philosophy and the Successful Couple Strategy™ that assist couples succeed at their relationship and their life. Stay Connected™ with Emma and receive weekly connection notes in your inbox with Personal Development and Relationship Enrichment insights and strategies, visit: www.metrorelationship.com.
STAY CONNECTED WITH US, SUBSCRIBE TO OUR NEWSLETTER
And, Get a FREE Relationship Enrichment Mini Course!
You CAN create the relationship you desire!
With this Mini Course learn how to immediately Break your Impasse, Improve your Communication, Increase your Intimacy, Connection and Fun, & Create a Strong Partnership...
And with Emma’s weekly Love rich with Personal Development & Relationship Enrichment know-how, announcements, resources and more straight into your inbox.
Emma K. Viglucci, LMFT has been in the mental health profession in varying capacities for the past 20+ years. She is the Founder and Director of metrorelationship.com a psychotherapy and coaching practice specializing in working with busy professional and entrepreneurial couples who are struggling getting on the same page and feeling connected. The work helps couples create a radiant and successful relationship and meaningful life by becoming a strong partnership and increasing their connection, intimacy, and fun. Emma is the creator of the MetroRelationship™ philosophy and the Successful Relationship Strategy™.
Pin It on Pinterest
We track visits and User's visit information to analyze our performance and trends in order to create targeted messaging and programs to best serve you. We use cookies to provide a personalized and smoother browsing experience. Refer to our Privacy Policy for additional details.
You consent to our tracking and cookies when using our Websites.OK
![Embrace a Softer Relationship™ to turn things around… [VIDEO]](https://akiaiw4iby4ubmrqrbvqcomhaystacksoftwarearq.s3.amazonaws.com/wp-content/uploads/2024/07/18021349/Embrace-a-Softer-Relationship%E2%84%A2-to-turn-things-around%E2%80%A6--1080x675.png)
![How to stop the fighting in your relationship [VIDEO]](https://akiaiw4iby4ubmrqrbvqcomhaystacksoftwarearq.s3.amazonaws.com/wp-content/uploads/2023/09/19124842/HOW-TO-STOP-THE-FIGHTING-IN-YOUR-RELATIONSHIP-1080x675.png)
